Temporary mixed sex changing at swimming pool

[Elepink]

Name changed for this.
The swimming pool is reopening next week - hurray! But they are not reopening the changing rooms due to Covid. Instead we have to arrive in our costumes and get changed (men and women together) in the long narrow spectator area at the side of the pool, and won't be able to choose where.

I phoned to ask them if they could have men and women at different ends for more privacy (it's a long pool) but the member of staff (all young men) said no, this isn't necessary as they expect customers to just towel dry themselves and leave (although they accept some will change totally).

I'm really stressed about this for reasons of privacy and dignity, and previous experience with a man trying to grope me at the pool (not reported at the time). Because this is a sensitive issue for me, I would appreciate honest advice on whether
1- to request again (any suggested wording?) they reconsider and let men/ women use different ends.
2-I should just accept not being able to go swimming again yet !

Thanks

I would speak to them again. They should allow some space for changing that is single sex or at least a private curtained area for changing

Tbh this wouldn't bother me as there's no changing and it's all completely out in the open.

By all means though do go back to them and ask if they would consider having ends, as it obviously concerns you.

Is it possible to park nearby and just remove a dressing gown or similar pool side? And swim, replace cover garment and leave?
It’s not the same experience as pre-Covid but you would get to swim?

Get something like this (I think Decathlon do one for about £30) and then you don't have to change at the pool at all.
sharksswimshop.com/collections/dryrobes-swimming-changing-robes

I was at a rehab centre for three weeks in Germany two years ago -- fabulous, modern place! But they were renovating the changing room area and had closed the men's room, and there was only one changing room for everyone.

There was a natural sorting-out. All the men changed at the entrance to the changing room, so you did have to see a few penises walking through. And all the women went deeper into the changing room, behind the rows of lockers, where they had privacy. After two weeks they reopened the men's changing room.

Decent men don't try to invade women's area. Is there a similar set-up at your pool, where you could somehow agree silently to separate?
........
Today I went swimming; it's a private pool in a hotel leisure centre of which I'm a member. They opened the pool again two weeks ago, but you have to book a slot and you only get an hour. The changing room is usually empty if you don't go on the dot of the hour.

Anyway, today when I went one of the staff members, a young man who usually leads my aqua-fit classes, was there hosing down the shower part of the changing room. He was the only person there. And normally I have my swimsuit on under my clothes, but today I didn't.

At first I felt a bit anxious, but in the end I changed right there with him in the background, hosing down the showers. I didn't check, but I'm sure he wasn't looking. I was wearing a dress and I pulled the suit on under the dress and then took it off, removed my bra, and pulled on the rest of the swimsuit. I had my back to him the whole time.

I could have gone into one of the toilets to change but I would have felt silly. He's a really lovely man and I know for sure he didn't peek, and why would he want to anyway? I'm going on 69!

The member of staff said all customers swimming in the same time slot will be changing in the same area- we will be 'escorted' there and will be mixed sex, with a chair in between us to ensure social distancing.

Multiple issues I can see with this - firstly its more likely to impact women, and particularly those from conservative background, secondly if theyre not enforcing a straight "put your clothes on top of your costume after" policy there's likely to be flashing. Indecent exposure is still a crime as far as I'm aware and there's plenty enough perverts who would get a kick out of subjecting random women to a view of their penis.

Thirdly (thought of another) this is bad enough in a relatively evenly sex split scenario, but if numbers of women reduce due to this absurd changing policy, how is it going to feel being a single woman getting changed in front of a group of men?

Just think of it as a beach.

Surely the logical thing would to have mixed sex sessions, female only and male only sessions? Round here there are lots of men who'd be equally unhappy with this arrangement.

Ffs of course this is going to put women and children at a disadvantage to men

It doesn't matter what you would do for your own decency (which is very easy to sort) it matters that there WILL be people (men) who think nothing of stripping off.

I think I'd approach them again and ask them to modify their rules to "wear your costume/shorts and a robe and flip flops and no removing costumes until you are off site entirely.

Or do sex segregated sessions.

Aren't you not allowed to get changed in changing rooms now anyway due to new rules, so it'd be a case of just putting your clothes on over yourself?
If so (apologies if wrong) but think that's like how it is here (I'm UK)

They need to ban removal of swimming costumes. People should just be toweling off and putting on something over their swimwear and changing at home.

Ask again. I don't think the German example is relevant here as culture and respect are different there.

One women's only session a week would be reasonable too.

This is appalling. I expect there are some men who will get a kick out of watching a woman undress, even if it’s just down to swimwear. I bet there will also be men who turn up without swimwear on underneath and will be gung-ho about flashing everyone while they change. The same again when getting dressed at the end.

I wonder what the logic behind not opening changing rooms is? My gym and pool is open, but they put cleaning stations everywhere and you have to sanitise your locker and the bench before and after using them.

Can they do some women only sessions?

Have they done an equality impact assessment?

@RedToothBrush. It's owned by Placesleisure so I don't know if they are required to do an Equality assessment or not - they run a lot of pools across the country for local councils, but I don't think (?) they are council owned.

@chattylion There was a very busy women only swim session each week before lockdown, but only in term time.

I think I will email them to ask again- if you have any suggested wording I would appreciate suggestions.

If you have women only sessions...absolutely essential in my view, it will be used as a testing ground for any guy who thinks he has a feeling he is a woman. Solution . Men only , women only ,and trans / non binary don’t knows in another .

@Gottalife

Just think of it as a beach.

That's what I thought too.

-You clarify what they said was correct
-You request, if it is correct, whether there are any allowances for anyone with previous trauma etc
-If not, you don't go swimming

I know that's harsh, I know it's not ideal, but nothing about this situation is ideal.

I’d certainly raise it again - it’s really not a big ask. I think people would naturally spread out / try to give people privacy. I do a lot of open water swimming and there isn’t anywhere to change and most people sort of spread out or certainly the guys keep their distance. I have a dry robe - it’s like a massive coat that you can change under - I do a full change to drive home from the lake as it’s about 25 miles away - it would be very hot inside but there is probably a similar thing that isn’t as heavy?

This seems like an impractical set up in general. But I think the idea that it is similar to a beach is on the right track, and they should set the rules to be similar as well - ie you don't get completely undressed.

I would email them again, say that this is potentially problematic for many women and children, especially some who are vulnerable (disabled, assault victims, religious), and they should consider either enforcing no undressing rules, have some women only times, or something similar.

At least you won’t have the wind trying to whisk your towel away at a critical moment.

People manage on beaches, even very crowded ones with the wind blowing and sand everywhere.

And it’s temporary, and you can choose to keep your swimmers on and use a robe or similar.

A full changing robe (top tip, get one with extra slots for your hands to dive in and adjust clothing) is easy to make with two towels stitched together if you can’t get hold of one.