Afghan women's campaign to the right to use their own name

[ErrolTheDragon]

DH sent me this link. Women in Afghanistan are rendered essentially nameless.

WhereIsMyName: Afghan women campaign for the right to reveal their name www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-53436335

It really is quite shocking. It's also horrifying how in just a few decades some Afghan women have been persuaded that it is right they are only referenced in relation to their male relations.

I was just coming on to post about that article.

"Using a woman's name in public is frowned upon and can be considered an insult. Many Afghan men are reluctant to say the names of their sisters, wives or mothers in public. Women are generally only referred to as the mother, daughter or sister of the eldest male in their family, and Afghan law dictates that only the father's name should be recorded on a birth certificate."

"The problem starts early, when a girl is born. It takes a long time for her to be given a name. Then when a woman is married her name does not appear on her wedding invitations. When she is ill her name does not appear on her prescription, and when she dies her name does not appear on her death certificate or even her headstone. "

Oh, damn it, sorry, Errol. I just posted on this - should have checked. I'll ask MN to remove it.

These quotes I found really interesting:

'Using a woman's name in public is frowned upon and can be considered an insult. Many Afghan men are reluctant to say the names of their sisters, wives or mothers in public. Women are generally only referred to as the mother, daughter or sister of the eldest male in their family, and Afghan law dictates that only the father's name should be recorded on a birth certificate.'

And I thought this quote was interesting:

'"When men deny women's identities, over time women themselves begin to censor their own identity." '

I have looked but can't find any links to the actual campaign. I'm guessing it might be in Arabic, which will make it harder to find.

God this is fucking horrifying.

Awful. Afghanistan is a classic example of how what a country looks like when men have their entire way on everything and women must be invisible. It's a fucking mess.

If you rank "countries I'd most/least like to live in" and then match them up against women's rights, I'm pretty sure there's a notable overlap.

It's also why I get very pissed off when people say oh you must let the poor illegal Afghan immigrant stay who's made it over from Calais because he's such a charity case, when a) he's started his career in the country in a massive illegal queue jump, b) he has been brought up in a society with those attitudes towards women's rights and he's not just going to shake that off the moment he sets foot in the UK, c) he takes resources away from existing people in need in the UK and d) the real Afghani victims who I'd like my cash to be helping are the women who currently have no sodding chance of getting out of that mess of a country.

The lives of women in Afghanistan never cease to shock me. How unbelievably dehumanising to go through your entire life and your name not be formally recorded or recognised anywhere.

I have so much respect and admiration for the women who are challenging this. Not only do they have to face opposition from men, but other women too.

"When we refer to women by their roles, their original and real identity gets lost," said Mr Darya. "When men deny women's identities, over time women themselves begin to censor their own identity."

And many woman in the country would not support the idea. "When someone asks me to tell them my name, I have to think about the honour of my brother, my father and my fiancé,"

When women are conditioned into thinking they must centre men in all that they do....

I didn't know that before. How shocking.

If your only identity is as Nigel's wife or David's daughter then how are you supposed to leave when they abuse you? Obviously the answer is you can't.

Amazing to see that even when fighting for the basic of human rights, women are told they should be focusing on other things first.

This is the #WhereIsMyName webinar.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=D-ZEsdYsThQ

Looks like the campaign comes under the Chadari Project.

chadariproject.com/about-chadari/

They are on Facebook and Instagram.

It's not very clear how one could donate though.
chadariproject.com/donate/

Oh look the BBC knows what a woman is when she's not from a western culture.

I'd like to be able to support this campaign too.

That's awful. And of course patriarchy playing another blinder by convincing many of the women that being nameless is in their interests. So depressing.

@stillathing Oh look the BBC knows what a woman is when she's not from a western culture

Glad someone else has noticed this!

Not that long ago married women here were referred to by husband's name. When opening our first joint account and despite my own name being given the cheque book( remember cheques!) still referred to me as Mrs Alan ......... As a GC twitterer says "Removing women's ability to describe themselves as a group ( or in my case as a person) is the ultimate act of male oppression"

I didn't know what, how appalling.

Thanks, Nonnymouse, for the links!

I didn’t know this. What a campaign to have to have.

I’m not for a minute claiming that I (or any British woman) faced such vile misogyny as Afghan women, but here in the UK in the 1980’s, I didn’t exist as far as the tax office was concerned, because I was a married woman.
When I sent in a tax return, the replies were always addressed to my husband. He was sent all my confidential financial details.
I retaliated by addressing all my correspondence to the tax inspector’s wife, and asked her to reply on behalf of her dear little husband! Surprisingly, it worked - post arrived in my name after that.

Agree that the idea of a woman being a piece of property of a man with no individual identity is something that has manifested in various ways across the world through history.

I retaliated by addressing all my correspondence to the tax inspector’s wife, and asked her to reply on behalf of her dear little husband! Surprisingly, it worked - post arrived in my name after that.

You are an inspiration.

With the current identity stuff going on, the fact that women have historically in many places around the world been deemed property and still are in Afghanistan to the extent their name must not be shared to anyone but those closest is a real wake up call.

The fact that rape within marriage was legal until the early 90s is a facet of this.

The thing that is really troubling is that women's rights do often get rolled back. Pics of women in Iran before the cultural Revolution Vs after as an example.

In the late 80s I went to a relatives funeral and throughout the service his widow was only referred to as "his wife" , I am not saying this is anything like Afghanistan but I was horrified then and no one else batted an eyelid. This was in the Highlands of Scotland

Absolutely, Shiny.

Some pics from Iran, from 70s to more recent: www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-47032829

And this article on Turkey - although as far as I can see whether they're banning hijabs or enforcing them, women are the ones getting told what to do throughout: www.huffpost.com/entry/women-and-islam-in-turkey_b_1153380?

Horrible that they don't even put the mother's name on the birth certificate out of fear of breaching this norm of not naming women in public. How can any woman assert her custodial rights as a parent?

Sad too that so many of the women campaigning for this have to live abroad. I agree with a PP that I would rather give asylum to 100 Afghan women to live in the UK than 1 Afghan man with the hateful attitudes their culture seems to have towards women.

I have tried to read a lot about Afghanistan for several decades now, and I never came across this custom! This makes me think that my knowledge base is much smaller than I thought.