Taking a break from it all

[CloudsCoveredTheSky]

I have repeaked so many times recently and now I just need to stop thinking about all the trans stuff for a while. The more I look into it, the more I realise how pointless taking a lot of these people seriously is.

You have:

Women who think we should all just "be kind" (death threats towards those we disagree with allowed of course)

Young people who spend way too much time online with no supervision - often in fandoms like Harry Potter and, oddly, kpop (do they think Korean men would, in any way, be interested in or support this stuff? It is one of the most sexually conservative countries in the developed world. They might wear make up, but the likelihood of them stepping up to defend ladydick is zero.)

People in general with low social skills who spend too much time online and just yelltype whatever comes into their heads because it has no consequences and they barely remember what they type from one minute to the next. There's no need to go out and make real life friends or interact with actual humans with all their imperfections because you can just chat online and block anyone the minute you feel uncomfortable.

I've noticed that none, literally none of my friends post pride or LGBT stuff anymore. My friends are all 30s to 40s and very left leaning. No one discusses the misogyny but no one has posted a thing about pride this year, not even my gay friends. I just think most people are sick of it, feel alienated, or support us but don't want a pile on.

I don't even know if these people are representative of the trans community as a whole. When I look at truscum stuff, they seem to hate both us and lgbtq+++++ people and yet they also don't truly believe they can change sex, so honestly, I have no problem with them at all. I don't care what anyone identifies as, as long as I am not compelled to play along or accept that "living as a woman" has any sort of real life meaning.

The more time I've spent on it, the more I realise that social media just doesn't work as an effective communication tool. Not if you actually want healthy discussion. There are not many people in real life who actually yell "SUCK MY LADYDICK" at people (none that I have met anyway.) It's all about clicks and advertising. The whole reddit ban thing has shown that, I think. And when you think about all the trans stuff on the BBC and the Guardian, why is it there? Because the woke click on it, we click on it, the alt right click on it to ogle what they see as freaks, people like my mum who couldn't give a shit about feminism click on it to moan that you can't say anything these days...it's really the perfect storm.

I think I will just avoid the media in general, social media in particular, while continuing to put pressure on my MP and giving money where I can, as well as supporting women and children in other ways (volunteering and supporting female friends). Honestly that just seems more effective than letting this stuff destroy my brain.

No disrespect to anyone who is continuing of course! I just feel exhausted by it all.

I thoroughly agree that anyone using the term 'ladydick' is transphobic. As a PP has pointed out, the OP was using this in the context that it's often used in by TRA supporters against women, i.e. weaponised as a threat. This is harmful to other, less vociferous trans people. It's also a timely consideration of how trans people's right to live unaccosted by abuse is being misappropriated by MRA in general, doubtless egged on by some of the toxic material posted on the manosphere. In relation to the repulsive cotton ceiling arguments and odd appropriation of the likes of the M&S lingerie section, it seems a pity that the agendas of the likes of AGPs, incels et al are not being divorced from the trans cause; or, indeed, that trans people are not actively divorcing themselves from it. You have to wonder why not.

OP, I hear you. There's probably a limit to what can be achieved if, like me, you'll likely be fired if you openly articulate reasonable arguments like JKR's. I've seen the cancel culture in action in academic and elsewhere, and it's brutal. Online pressure groups can do something, but for me they will need to be anonymous. I'll happily write to installers of 'mixed gender' loos to have the women's reinstated, or make other small steps that might make an accumulative difference. I'm a semi-regular and fairly sporadic poster on FWR, because although the issue is important I agree that the time and mental energy it takes up is exhausting.