Sure, I get it. Gamer to some people describes an identity. I also didn’t fit in as a kid, in college made good friends with other people some of them boys who gamed too. Nowadays I identify as a “filthy casual“ myself, though I still play for hours Each week. I play more casually because I literally can’t find the time to play as much as I used to given I have a job and kids which demand my time).
Still I can’t see how the identity definition is particularly useful. What If someone, plays games for hundreds of hours and writes commentary on it online? That’s what gaming journalists are, including Anita Sarkeesian. What if someone is a game maker but rarely plays them? If I used to game but can’t for practical reasons am I still a gamer?
I think what seems to have happened is that a lot of people who disagree with gamergate Discourse and definitions nevertheless Buy and play a lot of games (and not just candy crush). So the game making industry is of course going to cater to their expanding market. Jesse Singal is Himself a gamer, for example, he posts About it pretty often.
For me I saw gaming go from games that I at least though appealed to pretty much everyone... to the sort of Xbox era Of immature shooters like Halo, and worse things like Gears of War. I never realized how misogynistic the gaming community was until I went online. I’d only ever played with my brothers and their friends in person And these were all sweet guys who wouldn’t act that way. In college I didn’t have any interest in hanging with the “counter strike crew” - despite them being the most serious gamers - because those guys were the same kind of immature kids I had always avoided Online - instead I played With my friends who are not assholes.
So in my view gaming has always included a diversity of opinion and type and amount of games people play. I’d rather it be a big tent than some club where I have to use homophobic And misogynist slurs to fit in.