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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Catcalling pregnant women?!

43 replies

HairsprayBabe · 19/05/2020 11:07

Hi I don't really post in on this board but I thought I would get the most support here.

I am nearly 32 weeks pregnant and obviously so. I haven't been out on my own much since before I started showing with CV19 and all but I needed a prescription and my chemist is only a quick walk away from the house so I went for a walk down on my own this morning.

On the way there two men were working in a front drive and shouted something along the lines of "I bet your husband enjoyed doing that to you". I was a bit taken back because even though I have experienced cat calling pre-pregnancy I didn't expect it. I ignored and went down a different street home. Where a different man working on a car on the side of the road again shouted over this time saying he wished he had put that baby in me.

I again ignored but I just got in and had a bit of a cry, I felt really vulnerable and I am worried about going out again on my own if I need to.

Is catcalling pregnant women a thing? I think I am just shocked because I didn't expect it and I didn't really know how to handle it other than ignore and waddle walk a bit faster.

OP posts:
T0tallyFuckedUpFamily · 19/05/2020 14:18

Would you really? When I was pg I knew I could neither run away nor take the risk of being attacked so I didn't dare confront any of them.

I grew up in an abusive household and I left it an angry young woman, so I’ve said worse to creepy men, but to be fair I’ve never been pregnant so don’t know how I would feel under those circumstances. I swear if I was still a young woman, I’d be wearing a jacket camera, every time I left the house, so I could put these perverts online. It’s bloody depressing to think I was first cat called at 10yrs of age and 42 years later, young women are still going through it. Feminism isn’t needed and women have equality now, my arse.

zipzap02 · 19/05/2020 14:18

Ugh. Makes me cringe. Disgusting . Bless you.

deydododatdodontdeydo · 19/05/2020 15:25

Disgusting, what goes through their heads?
I honestly think they just like being unpleasant and making people uncomfortable and it's almost nothing to do with sexuality or anything. Like others said, they look for the vulnerable. I bet they were bullies at school.

AsTreesWalking · 19/05/2020 15:46

OP how truly horrible, I'm so sorry that happened to you.

TheProdigalKittensReturn · 19/05/2020 16:35

I honestly think they just like being unpleasant and making people uncomfortable and it's almost nothing to do with sexuality or anything. Like others said, they look for the vulnerable. I bet they were bullies at school.

Yep. They're getting something out of it, but that something is all about power and has nothing to do with any sort of healthy sexual impulses.

Rocaille · 19/05/2020 17:58

When I was pushing DS in a pushchair some blokes in a van slowed down alongside me and yelled MILF and some other gross stuff

Same, except it was my DD in her pram and they yelled 'slut'.

IdblowJonSnow · 19/05/2020 18:01

Ugh. That's awful op. So many vile men out there. Do kids learn about this stuff in high school so they're educated not to do it?
I live in a fairly PC bubble but have had more of my fair share of incidents over the years. Its fucking awful when it happens. Crying is a reasonable response and buggar all to do with hormones.

maria860 · 19/05/2020 18:56

I feel so bad for you I've never experienced this actually and I've come actors some right creeps over the years.
I'm 24 weeks pregnant and I do hate people staring at me in general now I feel self conscious.
I work in a very male dominant environment and I'm so glad I am on furlough as you get comments there all the time everyday it's stressful and as women we have to put up with it I don't know why though.
What is the matter with people are they honestly finding a sexual thing in pregnant women it's weird and kind of creepy.

T0tallyFuckedUpFamily · 19/05/2020 19:03

I honestly think they just like being unpleasant and making people uncomfortable and it's almost nothing to do with sexuality or anything. Like others said, they look for the vulnerable. I bet they were bullies at school.

I’m afraid I don’t really agree with you on this. It is sexist bullying because they don’t do it to men. Whether or not they were bullies in school, doesn’t come into it.

MsTSwift · 19/05/2020 19:34

“Nothing to do with sexuality or anything” is that a serious post ? 🙄

SapphosRock · 19/05/2020 21:06

Sorry OP that sounds vile.

I wasn't catcalled as such but a man jeered at me in front of his mates for being 'fat' when I was 8 months pregnant.

I remember crying afterwards too. Bloody pregnancy hormones.

It just happened the once to me. Twice in one day sounds like really bad luck Sad

deydododatdodontdeydo · 19/05/2020 23:17

It is sexist bullying because they don’t do it to men.

I'm afraid I don't really agree with you on this. It is sexist bullying. But I think the men who do this will also bully men. For different reasons, and no doubt they hate women, but they absolutely bully men too.

TehBewilderness · 20/05/2020 00:10

Catcalling is a public display of male dominance.
Hollaback is a website where you can post a pic of the cat caller, if you had a phone with you and if you though to take a pic.
A lot of cat callers run away now if women get out their phone. They know.

I am sorry they did that to you. I remember being terrified the first time I was cat called while pregnant. That was in 1965.

ILikeSardines · 20/05/2020 01:20

I'm sorry OP that's awful.

I have seen a lot of posts on here over the years with women talking about this.

I had the opposite experience, when I was heavily pg it all stopped. And it was lovely! It was only the second time in my life since about age 12 where the male gaze thing stopped and it made me realise both times how uncomfortable I felt just all the time generally because of it.

I'm in my mid to late 40s now and it has pretty much stopped. And when men do notice there's not the same creepy/ aggressive undertone. I love it. I realised, this is how men must feel all the time! Relaxed, confident, not being eyed lecherously all the time and worse.

The whole thing is shit op yes. They want to upset you is the bottom line. Bastards.

1Micem0use · 20/05/2020 06:30

I was going for a walk with my 4 month old in a sling. Some men we walked past said good afternoon, and commented on how cute my baby was. Said bye and walked away. Then one of them chased after us and asked for my fb. I pretended I didnt have fb. Not getting the hint he asked for my phone number. I looked at him in the eye and said i dont give my number to strangers. Then I turned and walked away. But I was shaken up for the rest of the day.

PositiveVibez · 20/05/2020 07:54

I remember pushing my buggy along and I did used to look young for my age. Not a humblebrag - I don't anymore 😂, but a transit van with 3 men actually stopped to ask me if I knew where the nearest council estate was, then all pissed themselves laughing.

I assume because I looked young and had a baby.

Fucking knobs.

Original poster
HairsprayBabe · 20/05/2020 09:50

Horrible that so many of us have gone through this ☹️😓😢

Thank you for the support I'm am glad to know it's not me

OP posts:
AtaMarie · 20/05/2020 10:04

Happened to me just once. A man passing me called me “sexy” and gave me a long up-and-down leering look. Am the type to snap back but being seven or so months I felt very exposed and upset.

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