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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Sports Relief

23 replies

LangClegsOpinionIsNoted · 12/03/2020 14:08

This may not make masses of sense, it's something I'm thinking through. Will probably be long as a result!

DD (5, yr1) has to wear sports kit to school tomorrow (and pay a quid, obvs) and she's going to have to just wear her bog standard PE kit.

This isn't because she isn't sporty, she's a really active kid, but she doesn't do any team based, run around with a ball on a pitch type sports. She swims, and is moving through her lessons at a great pace, cycles, and goes horse riding. To me, that's a decently sporty kid, and I've purposely steered her towards sports that she is more likely to keep going with into adolescence and hopefully into adulthood.

But, she can't wear any of the kit for these to school for the day. Swimwear is obviously out, cycling she just wears normal clothes and I don't want her helmet getting clonked around in school, ditto riding hat, and her jodhpurs are incredibly thick material, she'd boil. So she's going to shove her PE kit on.

I started thinking about this because nom hoping DD won't be upset that other people are wearing fun, colourful kit. Then I realised that when I was thinking 'people' I really was thinking 'boys'. Quite a few boys in her class do rugby or football, so they have kit for that. More will happen to have a footy shirt or rugby shirt because their dad will support X team, or because they support their own teams by now. Yes this is a bit of a stereotype but it's what I've discovered from chatting in the playground this week.

The other girls in her class, in contrast, don't do football and rugby, and don't have a team shirt hanging around at home. Lots of them do a range of sports/activities, but they also can't easily wear the kit to school. For eg, ballet and gymnastics = leotards which make going to the toilet in the day a pain, and are cold & revealing unless they put other clothes on top - by which point you can't see the kit. Martial arts - very bulky and warm, and often white, not best suited to a day of school.

My worry is that when she looks around at the school during that day, she'll see loads of boys in their sports gear, looking very obviously sporty. And hardly any girls in obvious sports gear. And this will feed the "sports are for boys" idea that I know from teaching at secondary is still completely prevalent in teenagers. I don't want her to conclude that she isn't sporty because she has worn her school PE kit.

It also annoys me that the thought process behind it is so boy centered - "oh they can come to school in their kit, that'll be nice and easy, won't interfere with the school day etc", which is only true if kit = football/rugby style shorts and t-shirt. And hardly any sports more likely to be done by girls use this type of kit.

Obviously I know girls can play football and rugby, and some will do, and may wear their kit, but most don't seem to, not in this class anyway. And why are those sports the default? Oh yes, it's because they are traditionally 'mens' sports, and so they are somehow better.

I'm annoyed. But I can't quite pin down into less than a thousand words exactly WHY it feels wrong.

OP posts:
Danceswithwarthogs · 12/03/2020 14:53

Do you have any sporty comfortable stuff she likes wearing...? ours love those slightly nylonny running leggings or even jogging bottoms with T-shirt/sweatshirt/hoodie and trainers. The sort of thing she’d be happy to do a park run or holiday sports club in.

I think it’s good for girls to find sports clothing that they like wearing... not covered in Elsa or super skimpy but comfortable and fun... though defeats the point if you have to spend a fortune in shops with a day’s notice Confused

LangClegsOpinionIsNoted · 12/03/2020 14:56

She lives in leggings and t shirts anyway, so she's always in comfy 'run around in' gear. And yes, I don't really want to buy something new just for the sake of it.

It's more that the whole "just wear sports kit" is actually a quite boy-centred thought, I think. Which grates.

OP posts:
ahagwearsapointybonnet · 12/03/2020 16:11

Mm, I thought this was going to be about where the donations are going to from this. Do we know? Hoping it's not going to be like Comic Relief, CIN etc previously, with money going to Mermaids and similar?

CheriLittlebottom · 12/03/2020 16:14

Oh god, I hadn't even thought about that. Anyone know?

Isadora2007 · 12/03/2020 16:14

Tracksuits are sporty and for both males and females. I kind of see where you’re going with it all but your girl could do football etc too which is good.
My sporty girl is a gymnast but has a tracksuit from when she represented our country (proud mum show off!) she will wear tomorrow. My son is also a gymnast and he will wear his tracksuit too.

OhHolyJesus · 12/03/2020 16:17

Yes they donate to mermaids.

Danceswithwarthogs · 12/03/2020 16:18

tbh I think a lot of activities at school are slightly tipped towards boys as they are sometimes harder to engage with school... girls are generally better at sitting down and concentrating without the need for football kits, superhero days, computer graphics, explosions or slime... but please don’t accuse me of gender stereotyping

AuntieStella · 12/03/2020 16:23

I doubt jodhpurs would be too hot at this time of year

Leggings and Tshirts wouid definitely count - it doesn't matter if it's also something they wear all the time.

Official football strips are very expensive, so I don't think everyone (or even every boy) will be in them in a typical state school.

CheriLittlebottom · 12/03/2020 16:26

Jodhpurs will definitely be too hot. She's got in them after a riding lesson on a freezing cold arena, and her classroom's average temperature rivals the surface of the sun.

CheriLittlebottom · 12/03/2020 16:27

I'll report back tomorrow as to whether my worries are justified re. visible sportiness! Am hoping to be wrong!

zanahoria · 13/03/2020 08:17

interesting thread, there are always adults who are more into the gear than the actual sport, not sure its the way to encourage kids into sport, I can see how you feel that gives out the wrong message, good for you for putting activities first. Not sure its a great idea to encourage football kits, although my nephew's school did a sports relief day where he was sponsored to wear a shirt of a rival team, which at least made it more fun.

Qcng · 13/03/2020 08:28

I sent my daughter in wearing her swimming goggles and vague sporty type leggings/top.

I don't think my daughter or yours will be particularly bothered about not having a football kit. Also, not all the boys will have a football/rugby kit, it'll probably feel worse for them!
Also, surely some of the girls will have a football kit?

I get what you're saying, you're worried the girls might get the impression sport is a "boy" thing, but realistically will that be the case?

CheriLittlebottom · 13/03/2020 11:26

Ok, to report:

Sat in the car park (5 mins) counting kit. 28 boys in full footie kit, 3 girls in full footie kit.

In dd's class - 6 boys in full football kit, 2 girls.

Most girls wearing "gym gear", colourful leggings and a t shirt or sweatshirt.

My DD is cheerfully oblivious. However one DD in her class was looking sad and telling the teacher she didn't look very sporty Sad, she was in colorful gym style leggings and a sweatshirt. Another girl was at the front of the class as I was on my way out, cuddled into her mum because she was feeling 'shy' about wearing her gymnastics leotard (with jogging bottoms too).

So yeah, all in all I'd say not working out so well for the girls as for the boys.

ButterflyBitch · 13/03/2020 11:40

My kids school could wear pe kit or sports kit. My sons wearing joggers and his rugby top and my daughters wearing her football kit including shin pads. One of her friends is in her gym leotard and leggings. Surely there will be a mixture of sports/pe kit?

CheriLittlebottom · 13/03/2020 11:46

There was a mix, but the kids who were wearing full football kit were very noticeable - bright, matching colours, including socks etc, and stood out as looking the most 'sporty'. And they were nearly all boys.

inwood · 13/03/2020 11:49

I can't help but think you are way overthinking this. My girls play football, they have kit because they wanted it not because the needed it. Last year they wore pe kit with their shin pads.

They could equally have gone in in a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a t shirt if there wasn't anything else.

CheriLittlebottom · 13/03/2020 11:51

Ok, but two girls in my dd's class were upset as a direct result of what they were wearing. That's not me overthinking, that's just a direct observation.

Danceswithwarthogs · 13/03/2020 12:38

We generally find any sort of mufti extremely stressful in our house, with indecision and last minute changing... possibly down to female socialisation and trying to look nice while being an alien... but more likely breaking routine and introducing choice into an environment which is usually very controlled for them

SarahTancredi · 13/03/2020 13:42

Think our school was a bit more sensible. They could wear sports kit or mufti.

The girls I saw on the way were all wearing sports leggings.

Languishingfemale · 13/03/2020 19:27

Hope it all went OK today for everyone's daughters?

HarrietThePi · 13/03/2020 19:41

What is (a?) mufti? My dd's school didn't do anything for sports relief that I know of.

CheriLittlebottom · 13/03/2020 19:45

Mufti is non uniform / own clothes in school. I had never heard of it living down south and was very confused when I started teaching in the north!

HarrietThePi · 18/03/2020 12:37

Ah thanks Cheri!

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