How? How can we tell girls we care THIS little about them? TRIGGER WARNING - abuse and rape

[ThisSistineWontScreamAtItself]

My god. My fucking god. How?

I'm a victim of rape as an adult, not a child. The way adult victims are treated is horrendous.

The way child victims are treated is equally and if not more (even as an adult I don't know if that's ok to say - I don't know what is ok to say anymore and I'm always scared to say anything for fear of being told I am being over dramatic / biased etc) repulsive and makes my heart even heavier.

Eleven years? When he has ADMITTED the charges? How are these our sentencing guidelines? How can this be?

I often feel just in grief for what is happening.

I'm aware this doesn't just happen to girls of course and it is equally as terrible for males who go through the same - I am just speaking in the feminism thread because I feel it's vital that society recognised the value they place on young women is so unbelievable from childhood onwards.

My heart breaks every time I read these stories.

www.devonlive.com/news/devon-news/senior-teacher-who-filmed-himself-1858669

my dd has something I didn't have, and that's me.

This spoke to me so much. I have had similar conversations with DSis, she birthed my beautiful, talented, complex, loving, intelligent, FANTASTIC DNiece. I want better for her than I have had, and I will fight for it, tooth and nail if necessary. DSis knows that she has my full support in sharing my story with DN, as and when she needs to (age appropriately) hear it. I have told DN that I am here for her - she can share, not share, talk, shout, scream, whatever, and i will be here for her. And i will tell her that until i am blue in the face.

Sistine, you have been dealt a heavier hand than most of us. Please know that, today (IWD ), you made a difference to my life, and DN's in turn. Much love, and hope for the future of our girls xx

Sistine, from what you have written, if you have a daughter she will be lucky to have you because you will care and you will believe.

I have 2 DDs and a DS. DD2 who is only in Y2 tells me that the boys in her class already claim that girls are less so I get the fear. And I am doing my best to raise DS to be a good man when he grows and not to think like that. I am glad you started the thread though am rambling myself.

I have sons and I know they're more likely to be murdered than girls. One of my sons was attacked twice in his teens. In one attack his jaw was broken and in the other a bottle was broken on his forehead. He will always bear the scars.

I was more traumatized by being badly beaten up (broken nose, two black eyes, split lip) than by either of my rapes.

The young of both sexes are very vulnerable.

It has made me even angrier that downloading abuse images is not considered 'actual abuse'.

The judge says:
"you have been downloading images of pre pubescent children and you clearly have a sexual interest in children.
"Sadly, you translated that sexual interest into the actual abuse of this girl.
Then the article says "here were also 327 images of young girls, including 12 showing serious abuse. "

Babdoc
Neither of them bought into the fluffy pink unicorn crap

I think your daughters sound wonderful and kick ass. However, saying the above makes me feel you have feminism all wrong, belittling something that is hyper feminine is sexist. A woman should not be belittled because she likes something different to you and something countless women and young girls all over the world like, it's damaging to the cause. I don't like fluffy pink unicorns and have never been described as feminine, so this isn't s defence of me but of other women who do.

Back to the topic, my heart goes out to the victims here, he perpetrator should've been given more than 11 years and the comments about him losing everything make me mad as hell. He had choices, he's entirely to blame.

The man that abused me abused at least 4 others, not all of us got guilty verdicts. He was sentenced for abusing over a period of 30 years. He got 16 years, could apply for parole after 8 (he's been in prison just over a year). Judge described him as a serial predatory paedophile. He could have got life, but he didn't. He needs to die in there, he is not safe in our society

www.pressreader.com/uk/midweek-sport/20190206/281586651843017

I'm so sorry, tooth.

you say this was something you neither chose or wanted

He tried to make it sound as if he could not control his actions. As if he was possessed by something. If that is the case, he needs to be locked away for life.

Will Willden, defending, said Rowe had never been in trouble before

Only because he hadn't been caught. He has a history of many crimes of abuse though. Why do judges always say this about abusers?

I am sorry for all of you who have experienced abuse of any kind

I am so grateful to everyone who has replied on this thread. I can't even put it into words (though I'm about to try!)

It's such amazing support and solidarity and empathy for some feelings I've never said out loud or even in writing before.

I used to say that the one thing I was certain of in life was that I would be a brilliant mum. Then after the attack (which also resulted in a termination) I felt that was stolen from me.

My first experience of being pregnant was that. An experience I had dreamed of since being little was stolen for ever.

But you know what? FUCK WHAT HAPPENED. I am still going to be the mum I have always wanted to be when I have children (whether through pregnancy or adoption to pass on the luck of me getting a second chance when I was a kid).

I feel fired up about this for the first time in ages (in a good way) because you're right, perhaps my experiences might even make me a better mum than I would have been otherwise.

Thank you all so much