What the GRA reform fiasco has revealed about safeguarding [edited by MNHQ at OP's request].

[FloralBunting]

So, the Times is reporting that the GRA reforms are dead. Time will tell, of course, but as we often analyse and examine beyond appearances in FWR, it occurs to me that this whole affair has brought to light many more surprising and worrying things than we realized.

Obviously, the rampant glee with which so many purportedly progressive men have let their repressed sexism and contempt for women flow freely has been a pretty unpleasant revelation, but I think there is something more surprising than that.

In all the discussions here and elsewhere in the last few years, the women here have been able to pinpoint that the hinge to all possible damage is a total disregard for Safeguarding frameworks.

Time and again, people have appeared on FWR to promote Self ID, gender identity as paramount over material reality, and all the attendant beliefs, and each of them has repeatedly demonstrated a complete absence of safeguarding knowledge.

What is most concerning about that is that some of them say they have had safeguarding training, or even that they work with vulnerable children and others.

It seems to me that, going forward, this egregious lip service - where a vital safety framework has been revealed to be smoke and mirrors among a large proportion of people who are tasked with implementing it - must be addressed.

I propose a concerted focus on actual Safeguarding education and implementation. Time and again, people, some of them in positions of power, some not, have illustrated that safeguarding principles are not at all well understood, let alone adequately implemented.

I'm starting this thread because I think this is a vitally important component of a society that looks after the vulnerable, because not only is there widespread ignorance about safeguarding, but some have very clearly been determined to undermine and remove it entirely, and I think that is something we should stop.

I'm encouraging us all to continue to ask questions, and I think it would be great to organize something lasting and effective, in terms of safeguarding education, so that the hard work put in over these last few years, and the consequences many of us have faced, actually lead in to something that will benefit our society, and genuinely make life better for women, children, and anyone who is vulnerable.

It's a huge subject, Toot - your local authority will have their MASH team information up, which will specify the main strategies, policies and responses in your area. If your children go to a preschool, nursery or school they will have a safeguarding policy that would be worth reading.

The NSPCC pants campaign, as Languishing says, is good in teaching young children about their bodily autonomy, however the NSPCC will not admit that all their messages about 'only you know when you are uncomfortable' and 'no always means no' and 'adults should never pressure you to do something that makes you uncomfortable, particularly around undressing etc' is conditional on whether the person saying no is female and the person being told no is male. If it's the case that a female child doesn't want to undress in front of a male child who has identified as a girl, the female child should be reminded to be 'kind' and that having those feelings and expressing them is discriminatory behaviour. The awful safeguarding messages and outcomes of teaching girls that they may not say no to males if it upsets them, and their feelings of discomfort must be predicated on their first emotionally caretaking any male in the situation, is screamingly obvious.

The Transgender Trend schools pack is well worth a read, and looks at valuing the needs and safeguarding of all children equally regardless of sex and gender identity.

Michelle I was really pleased to see you make the point about personality disorders so well. This is a huge area of weakness in safeguarding, in my opinion. Too many professionals of all sorts don't know about them, or worse still insist that they don't exist (for ideological reasons).

I know someone who did child protection social work training, and the existence of personality disorders was never touched upon. This in spite of, as you say, the huge importance of social workers being able to recognise that predators and harmful actors can be immensely plausible in presenting themselves as innocent and caring.

In contrast, the training put a huge emphasis on anti-oppressive practice. Fine, but if you are constantly worried about something you do being perceived as contributing to oppression and power imbalances, it is highly likely to affect your ability to stand firm when it comes to safeguarding.

safeschoolsallianceuk.net/

SSAUK's website. School focused, fairly obviously. And there are loads of us beavering away in these grassroots campaigning groups, with lots of different avenues of interest.

I'm still rolling ideas around - thinking about an awareness campaign, like the NSPCC Pants one, talking about safeguarding in an accessible way. There are some very gifted communicators among us.

How do you reach a society with a safeguarding message? How can we help build a culture where we all understand our role in safeguarding the vulnerable?

How do you reach a society with a safeguarding message? How can we help build a culture where we all understand our role in safeguarding the vulnerable?

Adults need to understand that we all have a responsibility to safeguard children & Vulnerable Adults.
Safeguarding frameworks have policies informed by legislation of course but the policies aren't in themselves 'Safeguarding'.

IMO this is quite a good demonstration:
www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=J2_fpofbyXw&feature=emb_logo

Great thread. Coincidentally I have been thinking similar this past week. It started with me wondering why LangCleg was such a one-off with her knowledge of safeguarding. Why aren't we all experts? How does one get training - and really good training too, that'll cover all potential pitfalls?

How does one get training - and really good training too, that'll cover all potential pitfalls?

I believe WPUK is looking at the feasibility of running 1 day events on specific topics. Julian Norman mentioned this at the legal workshop she ran at #WomensLib2020 - it would be helpful if one of them is an in-depth exploration of safeguarding.

IMO the trouble is that the general public doesn't appreciate the extent to which the current approach to trans children (and self-ID, which is often what's occurring in practice) threatens safeguarding.

I agree here, and would add that, (if I'm anything to go by) the trouble is also largely unaware of safeguarding as a concept. I only started to become aware that it was possible to have a systematic approach, with a set of clear rules after I started to worry about self-ID and visited Mumsnet.

It's gutting that Lang Cleg, who has so much to offer has been booted from Mumsnet, but heartening that so many others are ready to carry on with this essential issue that encompasses self-ID.

Having read this document (from the Scottish primary school with the drag queen scandal) I now understand just how schools are being regulatory captured. Take a look at the hours and commitment required from a school to receive the charter mark. And let's ask ourselves whether safeguarding children in a primary school receives the same levels of time and resources?

blogs.glowscotland.org.uk/re/public/glencoatsprimary/uploads/sites/2371/2019/10/LGBT-Schools-Charter-Standards-e-use-003.pdf

Elsewhere, someone suggested a low cost safeguarding training course. I think it's a great idea, perhaps a way to get away from this misconception that safeguarding is only for a select few professionals, and complex, academic and hard to understand.

That's really what I am aiming for here - practical, accessible ways to educate and therefore implement.

I think there's a need to conscious raise.
People, especially women, make decisions & actions which contribute to child Safguarding every day. Most won't realise this or the extent but then many may also not realise when a decision/action could have an undermining effect.

A key Safeguarding skill is reflection.
In social work reflective practice is a core skill which is taught.

Thank you for this thread.

Michelle your description of why safeguarding fails is spot on. I felt a bit uneasy about the second part though. Mainly because I’ve had a long battle getting the right support for my daughter. I’ve had multiple complaints running at the same time, and have been labelled as ‘a problem’ ‘crazy’ ‘unhinged’ ‘taking resources away from others’. To me it’s circular. If you highlight a safeguarding failure, and the person involved paints themselves as the victim, it gets twisted so the one that highlighted the issue becomes the ‘problem’.

Nonhypothetic tbh, if you worked in a county council office where you were looking at these complaints, you really wouldn't have much issue sorting the genuine ones in genuine pursuit of meeting needs from the ones that are …. well, less than logical and with no real purpose. Honest. It's about agencies having the policies and criteria to be able to take out the obviously purely vexatious and time wasting after a set number of responses, rather than have to follow exact same process even when it's completely obvious that it's vexatious.

How whistle blowers are treated is a very big issue which often reveals wider Safeguarding failings.

Defensive practice wont have the best outcomes & will undermine Safeguarding frameworks

Its why reflective practice is so important.

We, as a society, also have to consider the contributory factors which increase defensive practice.

The NSPCC pants campaign, as Languishing says, is good in teaching young children about their bodily autonomy.

Even this isn't entirely true. Most predators won't start by putting their hands down a child's pants. They'll do things like engage a child in tickling games. Or put an arm around a girl's shoulder and squeeze her breast. Or maybe just be very touchy-feely, so that the child knows something is wrong but it doesn't feel bad enough to speak up about.

Or maybe just be very touchy-feely, so that the child knows something is wrong but it doesn't feel bad enough to speak up about.

Adults might reflect on the impact of forcing children (especially very young ones) to kiss/be kissed/hugged on demand by older relatives who they don't know or when clearly uncomfortable.

Other adults can also help when parents are determined to get their children to kiss & the child is unwilling, just offer up a high five.

All of these may have implications for effective Safeguarding of children

The NSPCC came to my child's primary school and taught the children that child sexual abuse is when an adult does something sexual with you that makes you feel uncomfortable.

No mention that sexual acts with children their age are always a crime.

Or that the actual definition is when an adult does something sexual to a child (or asks a child to do it to them), regardless of the child's response. This used to be the NSPCC's line, too.

I mean this is what grooming is all about - to make the child comfortable with the abuse. We know from survivors of CSA, that they often did not know that what was happening was wrong and it sometimes took them a long time to understand that they were allowed boundaries around their own bodies and that they had a right to assert them, too. Against everyone and anyone.

That the NSPCC is teaching this to our children is hugely concerning.

I mean this is what grooming is all about - to make the child comfortable with the abuse. We know from survivors of CSA, that they often did not know that what was happening was wrong and it sometimes took them a long time to understand that they were allowed boundaries around their own bodies and that they had a right to assert them, too. Against everyone and anyone.

That the NSPCC is teaching this to our children is hugely concerning.

Yes
There are a number of significant indicators that NSPCC Safeguarding framework has failed. Too many people involved with writing policy, training volunteers etc don not understand Safeguarding.
This is one example of the consequences.
There have been other examples of the consequences.

Its very likely that will be very serious direct consequences of NSPCC Safeguarding failures which will only come to light in the future.

Respect someone's boundaries and don't try and gently convince them to drop their boundaries and discount their discomfort. Really simple, and yet we do it all the time.

When my daughter was little, I used to give her a little peck kiss on the lips. She's got the most beautiful cupid's bow mouth, and it was something I had adored about her since she first came into the world. When she was about 5, she started to dislike certain aspects of physical contact, including tickling and being kissed on the mouth. I didn't get it at first, because I am a part of our culture of "I think it's harmless" and I brushed it off a few times, but when I did get it, I realized that me respecting her 'no' was a hugely important thing, and this was way before I was a feminist at all.

I looked her in the eye, promised solemnly to never do those specific physical acts, like tickling etc. without her permission ever again, and I've never broken my promise. As a result, we have a relationship based on respect and trust, and she has always known that I will do what I say I will do and have her best interests at heart - which was actually hugely significant when she was trans-identifying because she knew I would not lie to her and wanted the best for her.

Thanks for clarifying Michelle. I suppose I’ve found, as R0wan said, defensive practice when I’ve raised concerns.

This is the NHS trust I’m complaining to - www.theguardian.com/society/2020/jan/28/urgent-inquiry-ordered-into-witch-hunt-at-west-suffolk-hospital

They have completely lost sight of who and what they are focussing on. They are more concerned with safeguarding their reputation. They see all complaints now as being vexatious just because people are raising complaints about concerns that were dismissed or glossed over at the time.

Reflective practice would’ve saved lives at this hospital.

Floral
Beyond your relationship with your daughter, she will also have learned that its ok to say no to adults' touch, that saying no shouldnt result in a withdrawal of love or affection.
Longer term, it may also likely inform how she responds to other people's boundaries.

Some of the most effective actions informed by Safeguarding are like dropping 'good' pebbles in a pond. The ripples travel.

Your daughter is fortunate to have you FloralBunting

Given the open sexualising of children that is currently happening via our libraries and primary schools by introducing them to concepts that they are far too young to understand, I'm just going to leave this article in the Times here. Chickens coming home to roost I would suggest:
Surge in Scots seeking help for fixation with child sex images :

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/dbd44dc2-5756-11ea-8d8f-51ad578bbcfe?shareToken=aabc241e257c45cc0451d575a2cc4e17

They have completely lost sight of who and what they are focussing on. They are more concerned with safeguarding their reputation. They see all complaints now as being vexatious just because people are raising complaints about concerns that were dismissed or glossed over at the time.

Reflective practice would’ve saved lives at this hospital.

Protecting reputation & limiting scrutiny has nothing to do with Safeguarding.

The people in the trust who are driving this will be working from a business model, not a Safeguarding one.

When there is systemic Safeguarding failures it will always be the most vulnerable who will be impacted first & to greatest degree be they children or Vulnerable Adults.

When two laws potentially conflict in the workplace, the Health and Safety at Work act always takes priority. Places I've worked have reinforced that nothing comes before safety. I'd like that to be expanded to include safeguarding. No other legislation or regulation is more important than keeping our vulnerable populations safe. But we need to get people to understand that material biological reality is the consideration that matters, not some philosophical argument about how you feel.

Given the open sexualising of children that is currently happening via our libraries and primary schools by introducing them to concepts that they are far too young to understand

Its not just libraries & schools though.
Many people have been promoting & celebrating adult men performing drag to young children. More who likely see the issues have not been challenging it.

Media & Social Media has been normalising adult men performing drag for years before this.

Pride marches do likewise with corporate sponsors also failing to do basic checks.

2018
'British Airways hires convicted paedophile drag queen as part of its Gay Pride celebrations
Darren Sewell represented national airline at Pride Festival in Brighton in August
Sewell, who has stage name Crystal Couture, was convicted of child rape in 1999
British Airways used an entertainment agency to hire ambassadors for float'
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6143783/British-Airways-hires-convicted-paedophile-drag-queen-Gay-Pride-celebrations.html

Brilliant thread - thanks Floral. Raising awareness of safeguarding is very much needed. Why aren't there free parental courses about it? I think it would be great if there were.

I recently raised a minor safeguarding concern with one of my daughter's clubs. It wasn't something that led to harm but was about communication with parents about who was going to be in loco parentis when the kids were going to be away from the normal club location - they had given wrong information to parents. The response I got was very jarring. I was treated as hysterical and the woman who'd made the mistake (giving us the wrong info) said that she was "worried that I was ok" for raising my concerns. I found it deeply disturbing as actually I wasn't asking for much - I just asked that I know who was going to be in charge ahead of time and that my child would know who it was too (either by meeting them ahead of time or at least a photo). It was interesting as speaking to the other parents, they were equally fed up to have been given the wrong information - and one parent said she had a son who really struggled with change so would have been very upset to turn up and discover a complete stranger in charge - but none of them felt able to challenge (though they were all glad I did so).

I really like the analogy of it being like airport security - there does need to be a cultural shift so it is like this - no-one is above being checked and being singled out for a bag search doesn't mean they think you're a drug lord! Questions from parents should be welcomed.

I do take the point from Michelle about vexatious individuals taking up time too for the authorities and deflecting from the truly vulnerable - they need a special force of older mums who've dealt with both toddlers and teenagers and set boundaries effectively to deal with the vexatious complainants I think!