Usbourne publishing calling mums transphobes

[Abite]

Go woke go broke

Sorry, this bit of my previous post:

• Introverted Izzy has just started Year 8 and is wildly excited when her favourite teacher announces auditions for a Christmas production of Guys and Dolls. Though shy, she’s come to love acting because on stage she “could be whoever I wanted.” And Izzy’s not the only member of her family who wants - and needs - to be who they really are, as she discovers when her dad tells the family he’s transgender and is about to begin transitioning. Though he gently explains, “It’s nothing to be ashamed of, it’s nothing dirty, I’m not ill”, Izzy’s older sister reacts angrily, her little brother accepts it in the same way he understands Spider Man and Peter Parker’s different identities, while Izzy feels quiet worry about how their lives will change. The family’s journey is honestly and sensitively portrayed as they endure hurtful prejudice alongside many heart-melting moments, such as the gorgeous scene in which the three siblings think-up their new name for Dad. This is at once an important support tool for children in similar situations, and a barrier-breaking, empathy-inducing story for all.*

Is a synopsis of the book.

This book isn't being marketed to and for the children of trans families. It's not about them.

There are plenty of trans groups and organisations that will step in to 'support' children and families in this situation.

The book is about getting everyone else to be nice, to go along with this for the sake of the poor children if nothing else. It's gaslighting, pure and simple.

If anyone from Usborne comes to this thread (Hi Usborne!), how about publishing a positive book about gender non-conformity like "My Body Is Me"? One that is actually supportive and accepting of our wonderfully diverse children just the way they are. Mums like that sort of thing. And we are the ones who buy the books for our much loved non-conforming children.

If a children's publisher is not up-to-date with basic safeguarding and issues of grooming, it is not fit for purpose. End of.

One of the main reasons I got into this debate was the wholesale disregard of basic child safeguarding protocols by genderist materials (especially when the children put most at risk by this are the very children who are questioning gender).

No group gets to undermine child safeguarding. I don't care which group it is. Every scandal regarding children has occurred because safeguarding has been subverted - be that Catholic priests, grooming gangs, children's TV entertainers.

I don't give two shits that it's genderists this time. It could be any group.

Books that promote children as responsible for their parents wellbeing are books that promote grooming. Stop looking at this from a genderist prism. It's not about genderism. Look at it from a safeguarding perspective. Because that's what it's about.

So Lang, have you read the book? Has anyone on this thread?

Why do you keep asking that @Retrofitted? Are you saying that the synopses and reviews online (which are many) are failing to describe the book accurately?

Clemene, I said in my first post asking the question: because it seems unreasonable to say that a book is grooming and to condemn its message in very strong terms, as many posts on this thread do, without having troubled to read it.

You have misunderstood the posts, I did try to explain how you have misunderstood but you ignored or didn't understand my explanation.

So Retrofitted, have you read the book. You’re telling everyone here that we seem unreasonable, but you haven’t actually shown any evidence to the contrary.

On that basis @Retrofitted no one can make a judgement on deciding to see a film or go to see a play or read a book or eat in a restaurant based on reviews. We are unable to form any kind of opinion or draw any kind of conclusion about anything based on other people's feedback.

And as I see the monitors are hard at work on this thread, I'll leave it there

Another day, another game-changing boycott.

#byeusborne, it's been dull and tedious knowing ya

Just dropping this here:

childrenoftransitioners.org/

Would love to see the book reviewed by a real life ‘Izzy’ - one that is now adult and able to view their childhood through the lens of adult (human female) womanhood.

Clymene, there’s a very big difference between choosing not to consume content based on a synopsis or review, compared with outright condemnation of it, to the point of calling it abusive, dangerous, grooming and calling for a boycott.

The first is exercising your right to choose. The second is actively seeking to damage the reputation of something without having consumed it.

It’s the reason verified reviews carry more weight than non verified, and why many platforms prevent reviews where the reviewer has not purchased an item.

I've not read the book - obviously. But I have read the whole thread and all the links and synopses. And that's enough for me to take a view on this.

Izzie's story could have been written about my daughter's best friend. It's so similar that I was taken aback.

It happened to this dear, lovely, shy girl right on the cusp of womanhood. It was made public when she'd just turned 12. I mention her age because I think it's significant - knowing what I know now.

The dad in question had cross dressed at weekends for many years. In his 50s he decided to medically transition and went abroad for the surgery. It was a huge shock for everyone outside of the immediate (and very private) family.

The mum didn't discuss much with me- but it was clear this was very hard for her. We all accepted it, kept any thoughts to ourselves, and celebrated the courage of this person. Of course we did.

Inside I wondered how on earth the children were coping but my daughter was absolutely protective of her best friend and would not hear a word of dissent or even concern about the situation. My daughter corrected anyone who still said he, or man, or dad. I was proud of her for being so loyal and accepting. Of course I was.

My daughter spent a lot of time with her best friend and family. On the surface it all seemed okay - as much as it could be.

Now my daughter is medically transitioning too. She suddenly became dysphoric at the age of 20, after a very traumatic time in her life. She was encouraged and supported by other young people who were transitioning and by older adults who I can only describe as activists.

Now I know what I do, and my critical thinking has kicked in, I often wonder how much she was affected by what happened to her best friend, and the gaslighting and grooming of young minds and hearts that took place.

We can't continue to allow a one-sided narrative to be pushed into our children. We owe them the truth and to explain it in a palatable and age-appropriate way.

We do not need books aimed at young children that peddle what can only be described as ideological propaganda.

And you don't think calling people who are questioning the narrative 'transphobic trolls' is saying they don't want our custom? Because that's how that tweet reads.

www.telegraph.co.uk/family/relationships/upset-thought-losing-dad-really-like-parent-transitions/

This article is by the author of the book. It’s behind a paywall, but the full text is posted elsewhere online.

Here’s a couple of quotes:

——————-

‘I first spoke to Justine (NB this is the adult transitioner) and other families with trans parents, back in 2015, while researching a non-fiction book about the experiences of lesbian, gay, bi and trans (LGBT) parents.
[...]
Justine’s daughter Samantha is now in her 20s, but still remembers that first conversation. “I was in my early teens when I noticed little things changing – pink slippers under the bed, the hair, the nails. But it's the modern world; who doesn't like pink? One day our parents sat us down and explained everything – dad was born to be a girl and they both loved us very much.” How did she feel? “I was upset because I thought I was losing my dad. But it's brought us closer, before we were drifting apart, I think because of the secrets. I'm happier in myself because my family are honest with me.”

‘In my research, I spoke to trans parents who came out when their children were in their teens or younger. But I kept wondering: What was it like from the other side? How did it really feel to be a child in a family where your mum or dad is transitioning?
This question inspired me to create the character of Izzy - an ordinary 12-year-old girl who lives with her mum, dad, brother and sister. When her dad comes out as trans, she starts to think that her life is not so ordinary after all.
Izzy’s not real, but the situation she faces is a reality for many children and young people.’

————

So from that it seems that the author only spoke to the child of an adult transitioner for the publicity article, not as research for either of her books (one non fiction, one fiction). Seems like a glaring omission to me, but then, I suppose complicated feelings about parents who transition wouldn’t fit the Stonewall remit.

(This is just a small percentage of the total article, I can’t post the whole thing because it’s against Mumsnet rules re: paywall and copyright)

I agree that we shouldn’t outright condemn anything before reading it...

Shall we buy one copy to share and send it on to each other via snail mail? Slowest book club in the world!

Ah the old mumsnet "YouMustReadALLTheBooks" poster. You still here?

Usborne is promoting this book as a valorisation of a child taking responsibility for its parent's wellbeing. Usborn itself advertises the book with this as its USP. None of the critical posts on this thread magicked this out of nowhere. Usborne did.

Valorising a child being responsible for a parent's wellbeing is antithetical to safeguarding and can act as a grooming mechanism on the book's readers.

If the contents of the actual book are different to the promotional campaign Usborne is running for it, I would suggest Retrofitted address their questions to Usborne. Why would they misrepresent the contents of a book they have published? Especially in ways that run counter to child safeguarding?

Finally, a boycott I can be part of.

I have no objection to Usbourne publishing the book.

I do object to Usbourne publicly labelling anyone who raised a concern about it as 'Transphobic trolls'.

Shame because I have bought quite a lot of Usbourne books over the years. I liked their non-fiction offerings.

I don't really want to read the book, as I don't want to give money to Stonewall. I am making some assumptions about it based on the synopsis and its provenance at this point. I guess I might end up reading it.

I'm told the author of the children of transitioners blog has ordered a copy so I'll be very interested to hear what she says.

What upsets me about this, is given how much propaganda is pushed on wives that we should accept transition and ignore our own feelings, it worries me greatly that this strategy is now being used on children.

I would hate for any children to read this and to feel guilty that they are not being accepting enough because I think that could be very damaging to them. Gaslighting and emotional blackmail are bad enough when used against adults, but unforgivable when used against children.

My ex wanted me to read a book by a couple who had stayed together, to try and get me to think we might be OK. I declined. I can imagine Dad's who are going to transition giving this book to their children to tell them how they should feel and react.

tinsel, its more and more, isn’t it. Children getting their heads messed with by things they hear and read.

I would suggest Retrofitted address their questions to Usborne

The only question I asked was has anyone read the book.