I was at FE college from 97-99. I was the equal ops officer. We ran a very small LGB club and a trans woman joined. I really liked her, she was lovely and she asked that they change it to LGBT.
The gay guy who was running the club was VERY AGAINST. We had a whole meeting about it and it was so civilised. The gay fella said that sexuality and gender were completely different, the challenges faced were very different and it didn't make sense to join forces.
The trans member said that as she was a lesbian as well, there was a cross over. Plus a lot of the violent transphobia and homophobia comes from the same place: performing femininity is wrong.
The rest of the club didn't feel strongly either way. Just that they wanted to be welcoming, to offer safety to those who were at risk from male violence for not conforming to heteronormativity and what was the harm? So, we added the T. This will have been in 1998 in a small midlands town.
I think the gay guy started an exclusive spinoff club, but no one thought that was transphobic.
Even though this trans member was attracted to women she never moaned on about the cotton ceiling or anything like that. It was all very wholesome. I went to NUS conference with her but she got her own room, I bunked with another young woman. No one questioned this or thought it was transphobic. It just made sense, as she was at the start of her transition.
The late 90s were very different.
I think what's happened is that lovely people like my old friend have been drowned out by people who are not acting in good faith who have glommed on to the movement.