The Queue for the Loo - why do we still tolerate it?

[ListeningQuietly]

In every public building / space / venue there are two blocks of cubicles.
One will have a queue
The other will not.

Why are the underused cubicles not redesignated as gender neutral
a nice sticker on the door of each one would do the trick
then groups of people from the queue can fully utilise the available resources,
leaving the existing users of that space to carry on using the urinals
and those in the original location with a shorter queue

a win-win I'd have thought

Mixed sex toilets makes them more dangerous for women (almost 90% of incidents are in mixed sex facilities).

There is a power and perpetrator imbalance which makes it more unsafe for women to have mixed sex toilet, than it does for men to have mixed sex toilets.

The solution is properly designed toilets for the volume of users, not increasing the risk of assault for women by having us use mixed sex facilities.

I don't just use any male loo - I make a judgement about whether it's safe. So I would use the men's at Alton Towers, but not in a pub at night. I don't consider it my right to be there and crucially I am no physical threat to the men there. There's a difference between very occasionally doing this and being in a situation where men have an absolute legal right to be in ladies just because they want to.
Even if plenty of women felt okay with unisex loos, plenty don't. Those who do, don't have the right to make that choice for everyone.

whilst the woman's stays for women only..
User, emm not sure if I'm reading your post correctly, but isn't part of the problem that women's aren't women's only anymore?

Op I think you ANBU
(very excited we have a voting button here I thought it was just for the aibu place! )
I xd the vote button by mistake and can't vote now :(

I don't just use any male loo - I make a judgement about whether it's safe.

But how can you justify using the men's toilets when people are arguing that toilets should be single sex? Two wrongs don't make a right do they? You can't say that absolutely no way should men use the ladies toilets because of privacy, dignity and safety issues and then say " oh but if there's a long queue for the ladies it's fine to use the men's". What about privacy, dignity and safety issues then?

I think a better solution would be ensure all the toilets actually work. There’s always at least one of the women’s toilets out of order which doesn’t help.

I’d prefer to keep single sex facilities personally.

Hearhooves
I think the op was tongue in cheek, yes it's not an idea that would work that well but at the same time no one would be thinking of the scenarios if the situation wasn't so bad at the moment. Women's are pretty much unisex or gendered neutral anway while the mens are left as they are. So why can't women use the mens?

Very few feminists on this thread agree with you GinU.

Oncewasblueandyellowtwo

I was more commenting on the several other posters who say they use the men's, plus the one whose DH uses the ladies when he goes to football. Are they all joking too?

I started this thread partly in jest
and partly out of deep anger that women are being expected to adapt and adjust when men are not.

I look forward to the day when 'self ID' boys are at the top public schools and the 'real' boys are told to put up and shut up

I know that many, many people do not want mixed bogs
if nothing else cos men seem to piss all over the floor
but I'm going to an event tomorrow where I know that a wee break will involve 15 minutes in a queue for me but my partner will be walking past empty cubicles
shall make him queue at the bar instead

To clarify, I don’t use men’s loos. I have been inside them due to my job as a police officer. I think toilets should be kept separate by sex. Only exception to my mind would be family toilets with nappy changing that mothers or fathers with young children or babies can use. Basically a family toilet would be a single toilet, sink, and nappy station in a seperate lockable room.

@ siring1 can I ask why you’d want unisex? I’ve always felt they are less safe for women and I like the privacy. I don’t think that’s anti feminist to say.

Sorry tag fail @siring1

I’ve always felt they are less safe for women and I like the privacy. I don’t think that’s anti feminist to say.

It isn't. At all.

What sex do you think of when listing these bahaviours?

-Peeping into windows, especially bedrooms -Spycams for sexual purposes -Theives of underwear off clotheslines -Period fetishists -People who get aroused at urination or defecation -People who get aroused by children -People who are thrilled by making women feel uncomfortable or scared

I could go on but.

Single sex spaces are there for good reasons.

WTF are women doing in there??

It really pisses me off

Ive told this story on another thread

Popped to service station loos...one cubicle for women/disabled access/baby change

In the gents obviously a bank of urinals and there was probably a cubicle in there as well

In the time it took for dd to go at least 20 men had walked in and out

Used the loo again a bit later, i was 3rd in the queue and eventually the door opened and A FUCKING MAN WALKED OUT

me and the other woman left in the queue were

(Before anyone gets over excited it wasnt a trans person...it was a man)

LangCleg Go into your Talk settings and see if its been mysteriously changed as if by magic all by itself. Mine had.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk?call=Preferences

I was really pleased when security policed the doors at the Oval and stopped men joining us in the ladies because they didn't want to queue and by default at a mens sporting event there are fewer queuing for the ladies.

There are studies saying we take significantly longer per visit because we have to wipe every time and do sanitary pad or cup or tampon changes and need more spare to do this and more time. Hence, we need more cubicles.

What on Earth do in toilets? Get in there, have a wee, get out. Job done.

Yes, I know people have issues. But not everyone. Some people are having a simple wee.

I was behind a woman in New York earlier in the year who proceeded to remove all sorts of accessories (scarves, jewellery) and hook them on the door before even starting her wee. fFS.

(I was also behind a trans woman at the toilets in Euston station recently. This person was out of the toilet so quickly that I wryly thought ‘they don’t pass as a woman.’

Fuck that, men's toilets are grim

Lancleg
OP here, I did not put the vote button next to the thread
and I cannot see it when I post.
I think its an MN glitch not a you glitch