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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

A woman's right to sterilisation

38 replies

Marinetta · 03/12/2019 19:46

I've just stumbled across an interesting documentary about the difficulties young women face when trying to get a sterilisation if they do not want any children. It would seem that many doctors are reluctant to carry out the procedure, often using the excuse that the woman is too young to know what she wants, will probably change her mind later and want kids when she's older or will meet a new partner who wants kids and will therefore regret having the operation.

According to the documentary it is extremely difficult for childless women under the age of 30 to get the go ahead for the procedure. It also seemed to suggest that doctors are a lot more willing to perform a vasectomy on a man and there is a lot more information available for the male procedure where women may struggle to find reliable reliable information relating to a sterilisation.

I wouldn't consider myself much of a feminist but it made me quite angry to see that women are being told that they can't do what they want with their bodies and we are expected to want children and those who don't are treated like there is something wrong with them or like they don't know what is best for them.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 03/12/2019 19:51

It's infuriating, I agree. Most doctors treating women as though they are daft children is the reason I went private at age 27 to have my tubes tied. 20 years later and I've never regretted it. Turns out I knew what I wanted after all.

TooGlamToGiveADamnn · 03/12/2019 19:52

This is one thing that angers me too.. I've already had 1 child and after a horrendous pregnancy and labour, I do not want another. But because I'm 23, they wouldn't even think about it.. but I know 500% I would never want another.

To be honest, my friends mum had three children and when she had her fourth, the baby was born with her whole stomach on the outside at week 29. They told her it was medically dangerous for her to have another pregnancy. But they refused to sterilise her at 38. They even refused to give her husband a vasectomy!

Shortfeet · 03/12/2019 20:00

The nhs should not be paying for this. Come on !

IHaveBrilloHair · 03/12/2019 20:01

I was sterilised age 30, with one child, and a single parent.
I was asked what would happen if I met a guy who wanted children, I was gobsmacked. I said I don't have children for men.
I then went on to tell him I'd already had one termination after a contraceptive failure and I'd have as many as it took to not have more children.
He looked at me like I was shit on his shoe, but signed the paper's for my sterilisation.
I'm 42 now, with an 18yr old and the same boyfriend for 14 years, no regrets.

Original poster
Marinetta · 03/12/2019 20:09

@Shortfeet I never said the NHS should pay for this.
I probably should have mentioned this in the first post but the documentary was not about the UK and the NHS was not involved. The women the documentary followed would have been paying for the operations themselves but still had issues in finding a doctor to take them on.

OP posts:
JellySlice · 03/12/2019 20:09

It's actually relatively easy for a young woman to get sterilised. All she has to do is identify as a man. The waiting list is about two years, at which point the NHS will quickly offer sterilisation.

PurpleDaisies · 03/12/2019 20:12

The nhs should not be paying for this. Come on!

Why not? It’s cheaper than maternity care.

kenandbarbie · 03/12/2019 20:13

Do young men find it difficult to get vasectomies I wonder?

Milanimilani · 03/12/2019 20:13

Sneaky eugenics. Present with a reasonable desire not to have any, or more, children, be sent away. Present with a mental health problem, the doctors rush to sterilise you.

Karwomannghia · 03/12/2019 20:14

Should the nhs not fund contraception?

Goosefoot · 03/12/2019 20:17

It's not consistent, that's for sure. I think doctors are probably right to be hesitant, I've just known far too many women who did actually change their minds to think it's unusual. But for the same reason, sterilisation through other means should also be seen as serious.

I think it was really only ignored at the beginning of all this because for a while the narrative was that it was a remedy for suicide. And more latterly, there is this "be who you really are" business with the implication that it is fulfilling your true nature. And now it's established as a normal practice.

Shortfeet · 03/12/2019 20:19

Oh ffs

BatSegundo · 03/12/2019 20:22

NHS is funding mine, but wanted to rule out cheaper/less risky/less permanent options first, which is fine in my view. Unfortunately, sterilisation regret does happen in 1 in 20 women. Reversal is not available on the NHS and is not very successful. Regret is significantly less common in older women who have children so I can see why younger women find it harder to access. There are some parallels with gender reassignment surgery and I believe both procedures should have significant safeguards around them, age being one of them.

PurpleDaisies · 03/12/2019 20:23

There are some parallels with gender reassignment surgery

Like what? Hmm

PurpleDaisies · 03/12/2019 20:23

A woman wanting to control her own fertility is nothing like gender reassignment.

Goosefoot · 03/12/2019 20:24

Like what?

Like making you infertile.

PurpleDaisies · 03/12/2019 20:26

Not wanting children or not the same as wanting gender reassignment.

What rabbit hole have I fallen into here?

villamariavintrapp · 03/12/2019 20:27

I don't think people are very well informed about sterilisation though.. often people want to be sterilised because they're definitely sure they don't want any more pregnancies, but it's not actually the best contraception-vasectomy is more effective, and so is Mirena coil. So if you definitely don't want to become pregnant again, there are better options. It's also major abdominal surgery, which can have significant complications/side effects and risks are much higher than for male vasectomy.. increased risk of ectopic pregnancy etc. There are lots of reasons that doctors are reluctant.

BatSegundo · 03/12/2019 20:31

purpledasies like it being a permanent change to your body that is difficult to reverse that is regretted by a not insignificant number of people who undergo it. Both need safeguards around the gatekeeping of the procedure and the younger the person, the more cautious we should be. That's all.

IlsSortLaPlupartAuNuitMostly · 03/12/2019 20:33

Bear in mind that standard tubal ligation is not gold standard contraception. If pregnancy would be truly disastrous (eg it would be medically dangerous and abortion would be difficult to access) then standard female sterilisation may not be a sufficiently safe option. Vasectomy is far more reliable if you’re planning to stick with the same man.

Many of us know women who’ve changed their minds about wanting children between the age of 18 and 40, even if they were apparently completely certain about never wanting them, so I understand why gynaecologists who spend their lives dealing with infertility might be reluctant to risk actively causing that level of distress in a patient. However - nobody ever asks a woman in her twenties who’s TTC, or indeed pregnant “are you sure? You’re quite young and it’s a big irreversible decision. What if you change your mind?”

BearHunting · 03/12/2019 20:38

The nhs should not be paying for this. Come on !

I disagree with that in principle. The NHS pay for other forms of contraception. And funding sterilisations is going to be cheaper than funding maternity care.

Although having said that, I was told recently by my GP surgery that there’s funding issues around female sterilisations. They’d rather give out a contraceptive implant or coil. And they suggested that DH gets a vasectomy instead, so presumably there’s no funding issues there. Incidentally, there wasn’t any mention of medical risks or reasons against female sterilisations during the appointment. Just talk of potential funding problems 🤷‍♀️

IHaveBrilloHair · 03/12/2019 20:52

I got pregnant with a coil in, the pregnancy that led to the termination the NHS paid for.

IlsSortLaPlupartAuNuitMostly · 03/12/2019 20:57

This is an interesting NHS link showing referral criteria in one area.
www.fundingrequests.cscsu.nhs.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/Female-Sterilisation-Referral-Criteria-April-2011.pdf

Greenmarmalade · 03/12/2019 21:00

I was offered sterilisation when pregnant with my 4th. The consultant offering it to me thought I was having my 3rd. I was planning a csection, so I guess it makes sense to get it done during the same op (although I didn’t).

ComeOnGordon · 03/12/2019 21:01

It cannot be described as major abdominal surgery IMO - it’s a quick laparoscopic procedure done under GA but as an outpatient.
I think the NHS are being short sighted in not paying for it - if a woman is sure of her own mind that she doesn’t want any more children then paying for contraception for the next 15-20 years is surely going to cost money too or the cost of maternity care and all the health costs of bringing another child/person into the world.

It was the best decision I ever made - I was sure that I never wanted to be pregnant again and according to my gynae the failure rate is similar to other contraceptives in the first 2 years and after that its virtually 0%.

I was only 32 but had no trouble getting it done (this was over a decade ago). The doctors explained the risks and that reversal wasn’t really an option but no one tried to dissuade me