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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Women being dismissed at the doctors

33 replies

UpfieldHatesWomen · 16/10/2019 16:15

I've had this problem a number of times, and a recent incident has got me absolutely fuming. I'm hardly a hypochondriac, I prefer to not go to the doctors and only go on average every two or so years when I have a problem that won't resolve on its own. This time I made an appointment because I had made a connection that I was getting chronic acne appearing overnight, at the exact same time and only when I had this other symptom, and wanting to know if the doctor could shed some light on why this was, as it didn't seem to fit the condition I'd been told I had. Instead I was told the acne wasn't connected, that I was imagining it, and was given the same prescription as before, which obviously hadn't worked. I've had other painful conditions dismissed in the past, on one occasion having to return several times for the same issue only to be asked by one doctor with a 'concerned' face why I was so worried about it as though I had Munchhausens (it was more the constant debilitating pain than 'worry' that was the issue, but of course that was all in my mind, silly woman!) until I finally got a diagnosis. In fact at this surgery I saw a number of different doctors, and the female doctor who finally diagnosed me asked 'has anyone actually examined you?' - indeed, the four previous times I'd been in they hadn't. Yes, it could be down to lack of time or resources on the NHS, but can't help think I would have been taken more seriously if I were a man, especially as these kinds of dismissive attitudes towards female patients are well-documented. Anyway, I'm venting a little bit, but I was wondering if there is any sort of campaign I can join that addresses these kinds of attitudes towards female patients? I'm lucky enough that this hasn't threatened my life so far, but it no doubt has for other women.

OP posts:
Antibles · 16/10/2019 16:58

I hear you UpfieldHatesWomen. I have bitter personal experience of this too. I could write an essay. And yes, it can cost lives.

AnneLovesGilbert · 16/10/2019 17:01

I’m sure @Graphista had a thread on exactly this. Sorry you’ve been treated so badly OP.

Grasspigeons · 16/10/2019 17:05

I hear you. The difference between my husbands level of treatment and mine is stark, to the point he handles all the chikdrens medical stuff now (after witnessing how dismissive someone was in A&E to me and our son, until he made himself known)

Horses4 · 16/10/2019 17:06

My daughter has been in a wheelchair for three months because of precisely this sort of attitude, when in fact she had drug-induced b12 deficiency. Three weeks off said drug, she is walking as well as a kid with arthritis can. To say we are livid is an understatement.

MadamBatty · 16/10/2019 17:11

Hi my friend died recently from uterine cancer at the age of 49. 6 weeks from diagnosis to death.

She’d been to the doctor 4 times over the previous year with flooding & been told it was ‘just menopause’

PlasticPatty · 16/10/2019 17:12

My gp treated me as if I had was a liar, and actually accused me of lying.
The new one is slightly better but after years of disrespect from the gp mentioned above, I daren't go!

UpfieldHatesWomen · 16/10/2019 17:16

So sorry to hear of these other experiences, especially where there are children involved as well. It's happened to me on numerous other occasions in addition to those given above, to the point where I'd really rather do anything than see a doctor. I'll have a look for the thread by Graphista, thanks AnneLovesGilbert. I wish there was some way doctors could be held to account for this kind of behaviour, such as a database of woman- friendly doctors (and those that aren't). I made sure I left a negative review on Google explaining what happened, which is something I suppose. If there was a campaign raising awareness of this I'd join it.

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UpfieldHatesWomen · 16/10/2019 17:18

MadamBatty I'm so so sorry. This is the inevitable outcome of this kind of dismissive attitude, there are no words. Flowers

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DaveMyHat · 16/10/2019 17:43

Have been back and forth to the doctors with chronic pain. I keep being prescribed anti depressants. I'm really pissed off. I don't think I have anything 'serious' but it is greatly diminishing my quality of life. I am depressed by my circumstances but I don't believe that antidepressants are going to fix things. I don't feel that I am believed. And I also hate going to the doctors and up until recently have rarely been.

MIdgebabe · 16/10/2019 17:49

Recently in the papers. They have improved the diagnosis of heart attacks in women, but haven't seen an improvement in survival rates, because the doctors are still subconsciously undertreating the females. Less likely to have stents for example,

OhHolyJesus · 16/10/2019 17:50

I'm so sorry to read these stories.

Experiences like this is why I never go to the doctor.

I'm not on twitter but this would make a good hashtag.

BeyondAvoidant · 16/10/2019 17:54

I've said this before, but I have a long history of my problems. I visited the GP as was experiencing mania along with my depression and was referred to the MH nurse. A bloke, who told me I only had PND and actually rolled his eyes at my concern that it wasn't that. Put me off mentioning my mental health for years, until I went around the frontline HCPs and got a direct referral to psych from an associated professional. I was (and am!) autistic, which had been the source of my mh struggles all along.

My exH went to the dr with his first instance of depression. He was referred straight to the psychiatrist, no gate keeping at all.

stealthsquirrelnutkin · 16/10/2019 17:55

Same thing has happened to me multiple times.

The most annoying thing is that when (after multiple appointments) they finally agree to carry out the tests I've been asking for, and the results come back and prove I was telling the truth all along, and it is glaringly obvious that their condescending dismissal of my concerns are shown to have caused me a great deal of unnecessary suffering, they NEVER APOLOGISE! Not once. Mostly they are pissed off to have been proved wrong.

Perhaps we should be aiming to change the way student doctors are trained in the UK?

Goosefoot · 16/10/2019 18:04

I think this sort of thing is common with a number of different groups of people. Women can be one, but it seems some women more than others. Class, education, and age are also big factors.

On the other side though, there are a lot of things that there aren't really good answers or diagnosis for, which can be very frustrating for patients, and doctors don't always communicate well about that.

I've known a few moms who became frustrated with their doctor's attitudes and made a point of dressing up and looking professional at appointments, and noticed a big change in attitude from the doctors. Which is pretty annoying but maybe worth it.

UpfieldHatesWomen · 16/10/2019 18:04

stealthsquirrelnutkin I agree, it would be great if student doctors were given awareness raising training in this area.
BeyondAvoidant I'm sorry you suffered for so long. I'm well aware that women being under- or misdiagnosed when they have autism is an ongoing issue to do with bias in studies diagnostic procedures which focus on male presentation. I think you can also add to that a general minimising of women's mental health issues (or diagnosis of a mental health issue when something else is the underlying problem, as in DaveMyHat's case), just the old 'hysteria' diagnosis still going strong after all these years.

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UpfieldHatesWomen · 16/10/2019 18:08

Goosefoot I agree, I look younger than I am and remember having a snarky attitude from a doctor once who was dismissing my symptoms, until she looked at my records and commented 'Oh, you're older than I thought you were'. Her tone then changed abruptly.

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Judashascomeintosomemoney · 16/10/2019 18:13

Yes, do search Graphista’s thread, it’s excellent and depressing in equal measure.

UpfieldHatesWomen · 16/10/2019 18:31

I've found it, here's the link for anyone else who wants to read it:
Thread

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FleetsumNJetsum · 16/10/2019 18:50

My (male) doctor laughed ha! ha! away my concerns that X symptoms would affect my gums and teeth. Silly woman.

Then at a regular dental check-up my (female) dentist said Yes, X symptoms will possibly adversely affect your gums and teeth, this is what we will do...

Just one of many examples.

Goosefoot · 16/10/2019 20:11

I agree, I look younger than I am and remember having a snarky attitude from a doctor once who was dismissing my symptoms, until she looked at my records and commented 'Oh, you're older than I thought you were'. Her tone then changed abruptly.

The elderly get treated like idiots a lot of the time as well. I do think part of the problem is too many patients per doctor, and they don't get to know them well as people. So impressions and stereotypes tend to play a bigger role in how they treat people, even if there is no ill intent.

PaperFlowers4 · 16/10/2019 21:13

I’ve heard a tip (probably on mumsnet) that if you’re asking for tests or further investigation of symptoms and the doctor is brushing you off, ask them to record your request and their refusal on your medical notes. They have to be accountable then. Women really have to be our own advocates when it comes to healthcare, and not back down.

courderoy · 16/10/2019 21:21

There was something in the news about a health app and heart attacks. The gist was that a women and a man both put in the same symptoms, man got told to go to a&E, woman got told to watch and wait. The justification was that heart problems more common in men and panic attacks more common in women.

courderoy · 16/10/2019 21:23

Article

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/its-hysteria-not-a-heart-attack-gp-app-tells-women-gm2vxbrqk

Not sure if the link will work

Tittie · 16/10/2019 21:37

My mum kept going back to the doctors about her abdominal pain and was given a range of bullshit diagnoses over several months, including a pulled muscle and anxiety (she was really chilled out and hated exercise). It wasn't until the pain was so bad that she wound up in hospital, that she finally got her stage 4 cancer diagnosis (she died 6 weeks later). I'm still fucking furious several years on 😔 and can't help but wonder if the outcome would've been the same if it had been my dad presenting the same symptoms instead.

PastTheGin · 16/10/2019 21:52

It’s a story I know only too well myself. I was suicidal with pain and repeatedly fobbed off with ludicrous suggestions and diagnoses. When I went private a saw a (female) specialist she immediately diagnosed me correctly and was more than impressed that I had made it that far without treatment.
I did complain about my treatment and am now with a different GP practice who treat their patients like adults.