Sunday Times: Gender reassignment: I’m man enough to admit that it was a mistake

[TimeLady]

Good on him for speaking out. I wish him well

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/gender-reassignment-im-man-enough-to-admit-that-it-was-a-mistake-g2nn79j9j?shareToken=36344b9975b97432517f1ca4cf4d2a2b

He is quite open that it's a sexual fetish. Perhaps removing his penis reduced his sex drive - just a guess.

It all sounds very tragic. But it's difficult to believe that people like this are being given the rights to call themselves women. Women are not men with a sexual fetish about women.

I hope that he does take legal action- doctors need to ‘do no harm’.

I hope he gets better legal advice than Andrea bloody Williams and the ‘Christian’ legal centre, though. As I recall, they’ve lost every case they’ve brought, including some high-profile anti-gay ones.

I really feel for the man in the article and am glad he’s found some sort of peace now. I agree with Datun that it’s shocking how blatantly fetishistic his outlook was/is (not just dressing in his mother’s clothes as a child, but as an adult assuming that once he’d had SRS he’d be invited to loads of ladies who lunch parties and holidays). I just wish he’d found some more sensible and compassionate help than extreme fundamentalist Christians.

" has not updated a birth certificate, issued on August 31, 2016, which said he had been born a girl."
How can they change a legal document to say something which is simply false. Even if you buy in to the crap that he became a woman once his penis was lopped off, when he was born he was a boy. Surely. What other legal documents can we lie on for a small administrative fee?

Where is the research on being a transvestite ? Where is the research on why some cross dressing males become totally gender dysphoric and some can have live with cross dressing just as a fetish?

This feeling of not belonging crops up again and again. The key to opening the door to the "girl gang". It just isn't true.

It's just all heartbreaking. I'm glad he's got friends now. I wouldn't wish all this on anyone.

I was speaking to a friend about that yesterday. I remember hearing about people being allowed to change their birth certificates on the radio. It was brought in with very little public discussion. I suspect it's not known by most people now.

I worry that parts of his story will be grist to the transphobia mill though; he points out that he was stared at and scared of being assaulted, both probably a result of transphobia. Doubtless the fact that women didn't automatically accept him as one of their own will be construed as transphobia too.

It all sounds very sad tbh. I'm glad his church kept him in the fold, so to speak, as it sounds like he'd have been incredibly isolated otherwise.

I am absolutely sick of this. We're being told that facts are subjective. And called transphobes if we disagree. But it only works one way.

This bloke seems a bit of a mess. He sounds like he has been easily swayed in his decisions to transition and detransirion. I wouldn't be surprised if he was a woman again next year. Its always interesting hear people's stories but my feeling is that the limelight is the last thing he needs.

He was told to live for 2 years "as a woman". If he had followed that advice he might have realised that it wasn't a ticket to a female friendship group. I can't fathom how doctors can mutilate people in this way.

But I also don't understand any cosmetic surgery, it's considered normal for women to request plastic bags to be sewn into their breasts to make them bigger. Why?

It stood out to me that he expected an almost instantaneous group of female friends - the media has helped to sell him this lie that all women are off having Prosecco brunches with our besties, going on spa days etc. It’s not really true of any women I know. Like he thought once he was a woman he’d be in a better social world. Unrealistic gender expectations and Isolation from “normal” life seems to be part of this for a lot of people.

whatever you think about the Christian Legal Centre, this is very true

He is being advised by the Christian Legal Centre, whose chief executive, Andrea Williams, is considering legal action on his behalf. “It is tragic that such a vulnerable man was given a life-changing, irreversible and ultimately devastating operation without his profound mental health issues being addressed properly,” she said

Peter is clearly vulnerable and looking for answers and support, including with the church. they won't encourage him to have elective and irreversible genital surgery though, so he's probably made a better choice this time around

I agree with zanahoria. It sounds like he has very little sense of himself at all and any external influence can alter that sense depending on his mental state. Must be terrifying.

The idea that surgery helps in these circumstances seems almost surreal. I agree too that his inability to 'live as a woman' for two years was a big red flag. Theres a reason for that 'medical gatekeeping' - its gatekeeping for medical treatment.

I'm no fan of the Christian Legal Centre as it is very conservative. Oddly enough the very conservative churches can be good places for some people who are very fragile as the conservative black and white thinking can provide clear boundaries. They can provide a security of being part of the in group. It has to be the right sort of fragile as they don't deal with homosexuality or women in leadership well but I'm glad to hear that this chap is getting support.

Thanks for the share.

As pp said, it all sounds a mess.
Surgery and putting on a dress won't make you something you're not. It won't address psychological issues or fetishes, as he has discovered.

I hope some good will come of sharing this story, if only to highlight the number of children being subjected to amputations, surgery, drugs, infertility.

He is right that hospitals will see more and more children who've been experimented on. Along with mounting numbers of legal claims of course

I feel sad for his family in all of this. The ex wives, the daughter. You only need to read the Trans Widows thread to see the devastating impact these men's actions have on their families.

The changing of birth certificates is outrageous!

How desperately sad. I cannot think of another area on medicine that would happily lop off a healthy body part like this. Dysphoric men are been sold a lie - it’s the lack of penis and testicles that make you a woman, nothing else.
Is this what women are reduced to? Just any body without a penis? I’m staggered by the outright misogyny of transgenderism and how easily people buy into it.

Its worth watching the video when he describes what he's been through-he strikes me as very vulnerable and has been blatantly lied to. I hope he finds peace with himself now.

Poor man. He needed support and psychological help not being pushed towards life altering surgery. This is why birth certificate me shouldn't be changed. It is a legal lie.

Looking at this poor man on the video, I hope he's getting psychotherapeutic help because he's in all kinds of need right now.

I didn't know about the birth certificate thing. You can't lie on a legal document, surely. Poor bloke wasn't born a girl! He was born a boy. It's sex, not gender. I hope he gets the help he so obviously needs.

Articles like this pointing out to the public that AGP cross-dressing is a sexual fetish, not a lifestyle choice, are long overdue.

As a society, perhaps we should be asking ourselves whether public displays of sexual fetishes, of whatever ilk, are acceptable. Most people, I imagine, would have issues with adult babies or rubber-clothed masked pups in the workplace. Where should that line be drawn? Why is womanface acceptable where other kinks are not?

He did well to speak out. We all know what happens when you do.

The part that stuck out to me was also the part mentioned above. His assumption of all the ladies who lunch etc and becoming part of it. How can drs ethically operate based on what are nonsense movie stereotypes that dont actually happen... people who clearly have no idea what a woman is or does performing surgeries telling men it makes them women.

If that's not all about the money and the publicity i dont know what is.

I feel awful for men like him , permanent alterations to their body and beger a part of what they have been told they are.

It's a sad case, isn't it? At least the bloke seems to have some, albeit basic, comprehension of the effects on his spouses and children.

It seems that religion can be both a precipitator and saviour of transitioners. I've read accounts where transition seems to have been an escape from religion and also accounts like these where religion picks up the pieces when transition turns out not to be the hoped-for panacea.

I do not believe AGP can ever be successfully destigmatised until it is understood as an aspect of male sexual identity.

This is going to sound heartless but having read the trans widows threads I found myself reading with growing annoyance at the chaos all of this will have caused to those around this bloke. This wasn't helped by the fact that his current choices are getting him more "you are so brave" comments albeit of a different nature to the ones he will have got before.

His AGP has been completely enabled by the medical establishment at a cost to us all.

I do feel sorry for the bloke and hope he reaches a stable part of his life when he isn't swayed so strongly by urges that come and then go.