“Friend zoning”

4 replies

Kit19 · 19/08/2019 08:28

Was looking forward to the new Jane Austen adaptation “sanditon” and then I read this www.radiotimes.com/news/2019-08-15/itv-jane-austen-adaptation-sanditon-like-love-island-says-andrew-davies/

PSA:there is ZERO requirement for a woman to reciprocate a guys feelings & comments like this from Davies just perpetuate the idea that women “owe” men who fall in love with them. I mean ffs how is this STILL a thing?

(Also the term fanny flutter made me a little sick on my mouth(

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wacademia · 19/08/2019 08:47

I can't remember who called this behaviour "girlfriend zoning" but it's a very apt description: the woman wants to be the man's friend but the man decides to girlfriend zone her without consulting her first, then acts like his decision is somehow her fault.

BarbaraStrozzi · 19/08/2019 09:06

I remember someone on here saying that the sort of man who talks about "friend zoning" thinks of women as a kind of slot machine: you put kindness in one end and you're supposed to get sex out of the other.

It's yet another variant on women as not fully human, with no right to their own desires. It sees women as passive recipients of men's desires and gatekeepers. We're not supposed to like sex with men we fancy, we're supposed to gate keep and award sex as a prize to men who have deemed themselves sufficiently morally worthy.

(Thinking about it, in Davies' oeuvre, typically it's only the "bad girls" who've allowed to enjoy sex).

Forgotthebins · 19/08/2019 09:17

I can never decide if I think that Andrew Davies actively detests Jane Austen's cleverness and nuance, or if he's just another mediocre male climbing over a woman to advance his own career.

Original poster

Kit19 · 19/08/2019 10:04

@wacademia - is never heard of it put like that before & it’s perfect

@BarbaraStrozzi yes it’s exactly that!

@Forgotthebins both! I shall be very interested if he keeps to Austen’s level headedness as regards women with little money or connections. Apparently the “ friendzone (or not) ” character is of a lower social status but passionately in love with her and therefore I entirely expect Davies to have Charlotte end up with him something Austen would never have done

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Flip