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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

sex selection by gay men using gestational surrogacy

11 replies

niceberg · 30/07/2019 11:28

This is an interesting overview of relevant research: www.bionews.org.uk/page_144104

Some quotes:
"A US study of 40 gay-father families created through (predominantly gestational) surrogacy, and 55 lesbian-mother families created through donor insemination, found that 60 percent of the men's children were boys and 40 percent were girls, while the children born to women were 50.9 percent boys, 49.1 percent girls (Blake et al. 2016; Golombok et al. 2017:6). The sample is not large enough to be conclusive, but together with the memoirs [referred to earlier in this article], it does raise the question of whether sex selection for boys is taking place among gay men who choose gestational surrogacy. "

"Other evidence suggests that in Europe and the US, SSS [social sex selection] is used most often to produce boys (Lemke and Rüppel 2019:89, Sharp et al. 2010). The Gallup polls indicate male preference is predominant among would-be American fathers and has changed very little over the past 78 years. In 2018, 43 percent of the men surveyed said they would want a son compared to 24 percent who opted for a daughter (Newport 2018). Women responding to the Gallup poll have consistently shown no preference. "

The author discusses possible reasons ('replication' of the parents; choosing traits that will help the child 'succeed') but does not address the possibility that the apparent skew by men toward choosing boys over girls could be down to old fashioned misogyny. Interesting omission. Interesting stats.

OP posts:
KettlePolly · 30/07/2019 11:54

That's interesting. Rich men who can buy what they like probably would tend to opt for an heir.

Jamsangwich · 30/07/2019 11:59

Could it also be that gay men may feel more confident in raising a boy, seeing as they were boys themselves at one point?

OvaHere · 30/07/2019 12:05

I can see that a number of same sex male couples would consider parenting a male child as an 'easier' option.

If they've thought ahead they may have decided that parenting a female child through puberty might be awkward and difficult.

It's not that different to straight men with daughters who opt to leave 'female business' to mothers. In the case of gay couples/single men there won't be a mother/daughter relationship to fall back on so they might choose sex selection to avoid it all.

I'm sure this isn't the whole picture but I can imagine it being part of the reasoning.

niceberg · 30/07/2019 12:11

But it is intriguing that the opposite isn't the case when you look at straight women's preferences, or lesbians who actually have had the opportunity of SSS. They consistently show no preference for girls.

OP posts:
TinklyLittleLaugh · 30/07/2019 12:16

But is it even possible to choose sex if you have straightforward AID?

InTheHeatofLisbon · 30/07/2019 12:16

Rich men who can buy what they like probably would tend to opt for an heir

That's genuinely chilling.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 30/07/2019 12:25

Look at Ronaldo's eldest child. He's like a little clone.

JustTurtlesAllTheWayDown · 30/07/2019 13:38

Could it also be that gay men may feel more confident in raising a boy, seeing as they were boys themselves at one point?

It could be, but there was no corresponding preference for girls among the lesbian couples who had an almost 50/50 split.

picklemepopcorn · 30/07/2019 13:43

Wonder what Caitlin Jenner and partner will choose? There's a conundrum.

Goosefoot · 30/07/2019 14:03

I wouldn't expect women to have a disinclination to raise boys in the same way men might be uncomfortable about girls.

It's also possibly psychologically easier to direct someone else you barely know to have a sex selective abortion, than it is for a pregnant woman to destroy her own child in her own womb.

drspouse · 30/07/2019 14:24

But is it even possible to choose sex if you have straightforward AID?
I think a reasonable proportion have IVF so could choose if they wished, and if the clinic allowed.

I'd be interested to see the proportion for gay and lesbian couples who adopt. There's a lot more in the way of "matching" that goes on and one of the main reasons why a child needs a gay or lesbian couple (as opposed to just being equally OK with straight or gay parents) is because of abuse at the hands of a birth (or step) parent of one sex or the other. Though I don't know if adults are more or less likely to abuse the child of their own sex.

But, then, children who need adoption come with siblings who also need adoption, and sometimes those siblings come along later and the best home for them is with their older siblings.

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