And what I am talking about is the risk, and the potential, for the same thing to happen to disabled spaces.
Unless I'm missing something, all that has actually happened is that MrsMaisel has explained why many disabled people prefer the phrase "identify as disabled", and pointed out that disabled people spend a lot of time having to listen to the whole people-faking-disability-for-benefits shit already. Especially those of us with invisible disabilities, who've been at the receiving end of those assumptions.
It is unfortunate that your partner didn't have that part of the form explained, so an informed choice could have been made. But the answer is not to get rid of that phrasing.
I also think the accusations aimed at the disability activist community are unneccessary, especially as you've already shown you've never engaged with that community (if you had you'd already know why "identify as disabled" is the preferred choice).
Clearly none of us in this thread, disabled or not, want able bodied people pretending to be disabled. Whether it's a fetish, a means to deceive, or a genuine mental health issue.
But those of us who identify as disabled would quite like our voices to be at least heard when we point out how we would like to talk about ourselves - especially as there is a tendency for able bodied people to use dehumanising language about us already, or to infantalise us.