Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Flip

Original poster

Pride?

25 replies

Isadora2007 · 15/06/2019 09:39

I’m sorry if there have been other posts here about this.
I am wondering given the GC stance of so many people here, myself included, how to feel around Pride?
There is a local acquaintance who is very much a spokesperson for Pride etc and I am constantly clashing swords with him on fb over trans issues. Given that Pride is LGBTQ+ these days, I feel conflicted. But then part of me wants to be supportive to the LGB element and I think as a mother it is good to attend with the children for diversity etc as we live a bit of a sheltered life.

OP posts:

EverardDigby · 15/06/2019 09:44

I'm bisexual and I don't go. Last time I went to our local one and took DD there were too many men in bondage gear for me to feel it was appropriate for children. I used to love Pride in the 90s, it was one of my favourite days of the year.

thatdamnwoman · 15/06/2019 09:46

I, my partner and a number of feminist GC women I know have been boycotting Pride for years. We have friends who are developing GC attitudes but who go to Pride for the fun of it. I'm afraid watching men dressed up in leather and rubber isn't my idea of fun, probably because I'm a lesbian...

DoctorDread · 15/06/2019 09:52

I took my DD last year and whilst we had fun, I agree there was a lot of fetishwear on show which caused a lot of questions so would suggest not if you don't fancy answering questions about sexual fetishes that you're not ready/don't feel are appropriate to answer for you mr DC. It was a fun day but it shouldn't really be a sexhibition imo and like any festival, it's predominantly geared up for adults unless otherwise stated as family friendly so I guess that's something to bear in mind. That said, it's probably not as bad as the Naked Bike Ride which is definitely a sight!

JackyHolyoake · 15/06/2019 09:57

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

thatdamnwoman · 15/06/2019 10:22

It feels like that at times at Pride, because although there are lots of ordinary people wearing everyday clothing there it's the men in bondage gear and fancy dress and leather who are the loudest and most visible. Pride has been taken over by them.

NeurotrashWarrior · 15/06/2019 10:30

A gay friend commented that as a person who'd received homophobic bullying he took umbridge at the thought of straight pride. My agreement was that pride is trying to be so inclusive it's becoming exclusive.

If I'm honest in a way LGB to me is so normal these days why do we need to make such an enormous thing about it? It should be normal. Pride often appears to me more like a Rio carnival.

Personally I'd get hold of a stack of books which normalise same sex relationships and tackle stereotyping - to me PRIDE is now a massive stereotype - and perhaps attend a different type of festival such as a Mela.

sackrifice · 15/06/2019 10:32

I call it SHAME here.

It's not what it was that's for sure.

Deliriumoftheendless · 15/06/2019 10:39

Last year our Pride was quite boring- Unison stalls and places hawking marriage packages. Plus a stall about eco issues. I took my little daughter and we left once we’d had an ice cream. Dunno what it was like at night.

GrumpyCatLives · 15/06/2019 10:59

My local pride has made it very clear that anyone with gender critical views is not welcome, so i don't go.

Go where you're celebrated, not tolerated.

moofolk · 15/06/2019 11:07

I was at Pride in Manchester last year when I heard Tony Cooper advocate dragging lesbians off the march 'by their saggy tits' from the stage. (Ref to Get the L Out in London).

He's apparently stood down now but who knows?

Lesbian presence is there but not as pronounced as male presence and the general vibe is not GC. Granted I was working at the Sparkle Stage but a weekend there has given me my fill of drag now I have had enough.

My gf would like us to go together but we are both unsure m. She has problems with Pride too which are more related to how commercial it has become which is also a massive bother for me. Manchester Pride is now such a behemoth it is moving out of the gay village.

Original poster

Isadora2007 · 15/06/2019 19:52

Thank you all for sharing. I think your views seem very much what I was already thinking... shame.

OP posts:

BuzzShitbagBobbly · 15/06/2019 19:57

I was in a position to veto my company joining on the blind "let's rainbow our logo" idea.

I told them it was political and not representative and not appropriate for our company. We have remained resolutely un-rainbowed.

FannyCann · 15/06/2019 20:38

Well done Buzz
Hopefully other companies will also be taking a critical look.

NeurotrashWarrior · 15/06/2019 21:04

Rainbow washing.

XXVaginaAndAUterus · 15/06/2019 21:20

I'm going. I think it's more important than ever to support L G & B.

AshQ · 15/06/2019 23:37

I took DS last year to watch the parade but we didn’t go into the main event.

DtPeabodysLoosePants · 15/06/2019 23:46

I find rainbows (unless in the sky) give me the rage these days. There's a massive one flying at DDs secondary school and rainbow flags painted on the wall. She's forced to use unisex toilets and emails to school have so far not gone down well. One teacher is a Mx. I don't even know how to pronounce that. The whole trans agender has taken over and the rights of lesbians are down the unisex pan along with the rest of women's rights. I suspect you're only welcome at pride events if you are male or woke and preferably both.

Supergranscape · 16/06/2019 06:37

Have boycotted Pride the past few years. Just done the March. Reason being that it's become very commercialised and very male orientated. This year I'm torn because I think lesbians need to become very visible again. It seems to me to be all about the trans community now. I'm not transphobic but there has some awful stuff going on. Lesbians being accused of being transphobic because they only want to have a relationship with a biological woman. Saying certain women are not welcome at Pride. It was never like this a few years ago. I salute the brave women at Vienna Pride yesterday. Looking deeper into this and certain organisations there is big money involved. Like a Phoenix we must rise again and try to find some dialogue instead of all this hate. Life is too short.

FionasWineShow · 16/06/2019 06:56

My perception - purely my perception - is that Pride is for gay men, not really the rest of the LGBTQI community. Having said that, even my gay DB doesn't get involved.

I feel like some sort of disintegration of the community is almost inevitable, given how vastly opposed the viewpoints of certain members (L versus TRA, for example), are.

I am GC (there are only two sexes), and fully admit to being transphobic - not because I don't support individual trans people's right to live life as they want, but because basically breathing these days is considered to be transphobic, so you might as well just shrug and admit it, and move on.

MenstruatorExtraordinaire · 16/06/2019 07:56

Last time I went, Pride felt like a massive male wank in public.

It didn't feel like something I'd want my kids to be watching at all. Sad really.

Birdsfoottrefoil · 16/06/2019 08:29

I have never been and never will. It is a long slow burn to getting sex and sexual fetishes accepted as public activities.

merrymouse · 16/06/2019 08:57

It's turned into commercial endeavour that is more concerned with including heterosexual, masculine presenting masons than gay rights.

I also have mixed feelings about whether a parade in itself can teach children much about diversity, whether it's Pride, Notting Hill or Rio de Janiero. Most people don't travel on floats or wear head dresses in every day life.

I don't think the organisers know what Pride is for. Their only metric seems to be corporate sponsorship. Deliberate linking of fetishism and general heterosexual inclusive sex preferences (Budweiser's flags for 'demi-sexuals') to being LG or B undermines gay people who just want to pay the mortgage and get their children to do their homework like everyone else.

It's difficult to argue that relationship education classes for primary school children that include gay people have nothing to do with sex when the people who organise Pride seem desperate to both sell pride as a family event and include 'kink'.

GrimDamnFanjo · 16/06/2019 09:08

A bit of a tangent but a year or so back I was looking for a lesbian cafe in London and research led me to news articles commenting on the decline of gay/lesbian only venues as younger generations reject closed spaces. Makes me wonder whether Pride will need to "diversify " ....

EverardDigby · 16/06/2019 09:40

We had quite a few lesbian pubs in London in the 90s, proper pubs with lesbians of all ages, not trendy bars for fashionable young people, I don't think there are any now. I don't know how lesbians form communities anymore.

BuzzShitbagBobbly · 16/06/2019 09:52

I don't know how lesbians form communities anymore.

A friend of mine and her girlfriend have found a bar which has been adopted by a lot of local LGBT people, but is not exclusively a lesbian or gay pub.

However much of the clientele seem to be (surprise surprise) middle aged men who identify as trans.

Flip