WIBU to write back

[HereBeFuckery]

matadornetwork.com/life/dear-straight-allies-please-dont-come-pride-youve-understood-6-things/

Posted by an acquaintance on Fb.

I want to post back 'Dear people-who-attend-Pride-who-consider-it-to-be-an-event-aimed-at-them (so as not to leave out any of the alphabet soup),
Please stop misgendering me as 'cis'. Please stop speaking to me as if I am a particularly oblivious tourist.
Please stop assuming I give a shiny shit about whatever your kink/fetish/orientation/presentation is.
Please take a second to notice that you mention ONLY your 'trans sisters', which kind of tells you something about the agenda here, doesn't it?
Please stop making out that gay/queer etc people can't hold hands in public. It's 2019. In the UK (where the Pride you are talking about is about to happen), this is now reasonably unremarkable, with some discrimination still, but we do not in this country (by and large) live in the age of The Love That Dare Not Speak Its Name.

Looking at those behaviours (name calling, mansplaining, arrogance, ignoring a whole group of people based on their sexual organs, exaggerating severity of discomfort), I am going to hazard a guess who wrote this (I didn't look at the byline.)

WIBU to post this?

Now read thread

Idea gay men and lesbians can hold hands and no one bats an eyelid not true

However the trans thing means I can hold hands with 6'1 DH and say we are lesbian couple so all bets are off really

@StrippingTheVelvet so questioning anything to do with the gay/queer/trans etc community makes me homophobic? Even if my question is based on asking gay friends to explain their experience to me (when they are comfortable to do so), and checking my thinking to make sure I am not making their lives harder.

Okaaaaaay. That was kind of my point, thanks for making it for me.
No questioning. Got it.

@RiddleyW it was addressed as a letter. Admittedly with no names recipient, but yes, I took it to mean it's addressed personally to all readers. Is that okay?

You don't think you're making the lives of gay people harder by dismissing the idea of homophoobic hate crimes?

Yeah the dismissing hate crimes was what did it for me.

Why is this posted in feminism? Do you think lesbians are somehow getting in the way of feminism?

It was posted in feminism because of the trans narrative. And because it's a free country.

As a femme-presenting queer woman

Nope, that doesn't mean trans at all. It's a North American term, it is how my Canadian friend describes herself and she is a biological woman. I'm assuming it just means she is not butch and dresses in a more stereotypically feminine way.

I do agree Pride has now become a party spot for straight people and the high ticket prices probably push a lot of gay people out.

Agree pride has become v corporate. At companies that sponsor allies are invited to go so you can't really blame them if they do. I think the whole thing has lost its way.

Gay bloke at work v pissed off his view is pride is protest been watered down etc.

Thing is, Eg this person. The words don't mean much really. Femme presenting queer woman can mean male or female attracted to males or females. Kink is queer now. Everyone pretty much is under the trans umbrella.

You can't change what words mean and who is included in groups then be pissed off when people act based on the new meanings and structures.

All the straight men and women with blue hair / who once kissed someone same sex / are het but like a bit of light bondage at the weekend have been explicitly told they are part of this and are welcome.

In fact the only solid part in femme presenting queer woman is that the person wears things like skirts and makeup.

Queer means nothing, woman means nothing.

It's all about the clothes, that's the only piece which actually means something.

FUCKS SAKE.