"Sex games gone wrong" that result in women's death.

[RubberTreePlant]

Never men's death.

In the need again today.

This is a poisonous notion isn't it?

I agree that it should not be allowed as a defence, allowing it as a defence implies that the other person does not have a duty to make sure they are not causing harm

thank you all - yes - i think we should try a petition.

One excellent woman tried to do one but it was rejected as there was an active case in the courts. These cases are now so common it will not be possible to avoid such a time...

We'll have a think - we only get one chance at the petition wording so need to get it right.

I’ve had a partner (ironically someone I loved very much) frighten me by the pressure he put on my throat during sex.

I guess young men see this in porn, and so do middle aged men, all men basically. And then they try it out, because they’ve got used to coming with that scene in front of their eyes. Do you think it unleashes something in them? A kind of savagery? Which might presumably in many cases have remained latent for a lifetime, if they hadn’t been exposed to these practices?

In saying this I’m trying to work out why there’s been this hideous upsurge in men doing this. Why the courts are even entertaining this as a defence is a different question. Are there any groups of female barristers making a noise about this? In legal journals and articles for press etc?

The pictures are so terrible. She is so tiny and young. For her to be alone, and frightened and killed by that large powerful man, is such a horrific thought.

womandaresto Harriet Harman used to be very exercised about the crap excuses men get away with for killing women. Have you had any engagement with her?

Poor woman

And her poor family and friends that have had to see her humiliated beyond death with this nasty, salacious, victim-blaming treatment of her murder.

The increased pornification of our society is deeply concerning imo.

Just adding this really strong piece by Holly Lawford-Smith www.thearticle.com/when-hundreds-of-women-are-dying-as-a-result-of-sex-its-a-sure-sign-men-are-doing-something-wrong#

(we've clarified that the "hundreds" is a bit of global healdine-y rounding by the news site, in the UK we know of 50 women).

In answer to Victoria's question above - we have heard from Harriet Harman.

I set up the site in response to her appearance on this on Woman's Hour - she hadn't then known of other cases beyond Natalie Connolly's.

Harriet is excellent and raging on the WH piece: www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0001l78

It's not just when it ends in death but also violent sex generally. Look at the two different judgements from two different judges in this case. One was appalled. The other? Oh she was egging them on and obviously loving it. How can they be so diametrically opposed? I think we all know the answer is PORN.

calgarysun.com/news/crime/rough-sex-between-girl-and-three-males-was-consensual-judge-rules

I know of one instance where the sex games thing was toned down.

"Man murdered transgender woman after drugs binge" was the ubiquitous headline. One or two news outlets mentioned 'sex and drugs binge'.

The sexual encounter took place over three days at various locations. The suggestion that there had been 'consent' or 'a game' weren't seen as relevant to Naomi Hershi's conduct before the murder in a hotel room at Heathrow. LGBT newspapers reported the murder as a transphobic one.

The murderer got 20 years imprisonment.

And then they try it out, because they’ve got used to coming with that scene in front of their eyes. Do you think it unleashes something in them? A kind of savagery? Which might presumably in many cases have remained latent for a lifetime, if they hadn’t been exposed to these practices?
I see it as a way of reprogramming the unconscious mind such that domination/strangulation of the partner becomes fused with the peak of sexual pleasure and release, then comes the drive to escalate

Another day - news reports on two more claimed "sex game" cases.

Lorena Mazzeo killed in Spain. Salacious reporting in the mail www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6955461/Woman-strangled-death-shower-hose-sex-game-gone-wrong-Canary-Islands.html

And this man convicted of very serious injuries to his partner, and sentenced to 9 years. Decent reporting from the Liverpool Echo, and Merseyside police seem to have treated this as a serious domestic violence incident www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/news/liverpool-news/abuser-jailed-after-left-ex-16176337.amp

BTW I made a graphic to show how frequently this is claimed as part of a death defence