Update: identifying as non-binary for work award

[Somerville1234]

Can't find the old thread... but anyway, there's an award/opportunity at work, only for people who are LGBT+++. I don't remember all the categories but they included genderqueer, genderfluid and genderfree. Also K, which I'm reliably informed stands for kink lifestyle. I don't understand why someone would need a special thing at work for getting off on weeing and whips (?? I don't watch porn, I don't have a clue), but maybe I'm just old fashioned. Anyway, old fashioned or not, I'm gender free because I don't believe in gender. And I wanted the professional opportunity. (Forgive me for the vagueness - being careful because of doxxing.) And you lot were encouraging...

I ended up applying - which didn't involve saying how I met the criteria, just ticking that I did. And then I was perpexedly approached by my woke boss.
(WB "Erm... so you realise that this is for LGBT+++ employees, Somer?"
S "Yes."
WB "Erm...it was my understanding you're a straight woman...?"
S "I'm genderfree and-"
WB: "Really?"
S "Yes, and I think I need to remind you that the staff handbook recommends that no-one should assume anybody elses's gender."
WB: "Oh, terribly sorry about that.")

I then had a lovely meeting with HR where they were very keen to update my pronouns on the system. I told them that being gender free I require the box beside gender to be left empty, but that I can accept female pronouns because that's my biological sex. They were happy with this novel idea and to learn more about the difference between sex and gender. They young HR person didn't know they're not synonyms but he learns something new every day apparently.

And now... I've heard I'm shortlisted for the next round!
It's been announced to the whole company, and I've had a few bemused looks but no direct transphobia, I'm happy to report.
My longsuffering DH (works in same field) has been teased a bit for my gender identity but he's happy to suffer for the sake of my fight for equality.

Binary Aware Rad Fem?

Biology Aware Rad Fem.

I am in awe, what a marvellous exposure of the ridiculous ideology this is. And such an exposure that they care so passionately about boring mums identifying into their club, when they didn't make any noise whatsoever about the paedophiles and abusers.

Is anyone not blocked by Harrop? According to twitter he is telling people to report genderfree accounts.

I'm not on twitter much and he hasn't blocked me...

Harrop tweeted a "warning" but it was the first reply who encouraged reporting.

Crossposted

Someone who replied to him said this.

How the hell does Harrop know that? I believe quite a lot of us are absolutely serious about being genderfree. If I'm not allowed to be genderfree then for sure nonbinary ('A person is non-binary if their gender identity is something other than male or female. Non-binary individuals may identify as gender fluid, agender (without gender), off the binary, or something else entirely. ')

Maybe he should take to task some of the people who invalidate and mock the lived experiences of women, hmm?

They think it's mockery. They have spent the last goodness knows how long ignoring what feminists have been saying WRT Gender, styling themselves as the Gender warriors who were the first to notice Gender not being a positive thing.

The problem for them is as much as they waffle about breaking the Gender binary, they love Gender. The reason they are so, so pissed off is because they've finally realized that feminists do want to smash Gender, and have stolen their wind. How can they keep saying they want to end the 'binary' (which they don't) if these awful women come along and do a better job.

Harrop & co are spinning in the wind and don't know how to counter it at all. Heartening stuff.

I'm definitely sincere about being genderfree. A rejection of the gender binary is a basic tenet of feminism.

The fact that Harrop and other AWAs think we're not allowed to define our own gender identity is outrageous. I thought their argument was acceptance without exception.

What's so funny is how furious they are that the boring mums they are determined to classify as "cis" have dared to decide our own gender. It's perfectly obvious that they don't think we should be allowed.

While I understand declaring oneself genderfree, I'm not.

Gender isn't a feeling, or lack of it. It's an external system of oppression. I can't identify my way out of it, I have to fight it.

I am a woman, that's all there is to it. A woman in virtue of my biology. Which society uses as a marker to pay me less (won that court case), leave me at disproportionate risk of sexual assault.

I'm not, and can never be "genderfree" because gender isn't a feeling (or lack thereof), it's a political movement.

It's irony not mocking. Many women have found that there is an 'identity' in this movement that actually does describe their feelings towards gender.
Acceptance without exception.
The phrase 'hoisted by his(her) own petard' also springs to mind. Ah well.

Well I’m Genderweid apparently.

Genderweird: a term used to describe those whose gender cannot be described by any existing label, or cannot be pinned down as such.”

Ps anyone wanting to march in Pride can have their very own nonbinary flag here

www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Genderblank-1-554424773

I especially like Astralgender

www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Astralgender-555595035

I think I am Astralgenderweird.

I came out as gender fluid in the survey from this thread. Fair enough, sometimes I embrace the gender expectations of my ascribed at birth sex, my wedding dress for example. Most of the time I wear gender neutral clothing shaped for my sex and give no thought to gendered living.
I am constantly encouraging both my dd and ds to look beyond the gendered expectations society as of them.
To be fair to those on Twitter who are horrified, there is nothing less cool than your middle aged mum rocking up to your party and joining in.

dreich so very true.

That’s us that is.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=7g3P18rTFMA

Twitter is concerned about heresy against the great god, Gender.

You can see their point. If people start to think about what gender actually is, then the whole ideology could fall apart pretty sharpish.

I'm actually a little cross with the dismissal of this as mocking as much as I am amused by the hypocrisy of the AWA's responses.

This isn't mockery, this is part and bloody parcel of the feminist movement to dismantle the oppression that is Gender, and the insistence that our rejection of Gender and the oppressive designation of cis is not allowed is exactly how we show that the Trans movement is not about liberating the oppressed, it's about reinforcing a specifically patriarchal hierarchy.

xeno that made me smile!

But we aren't mocking, after trying to balance raising dc, a career/job and aging I am totally sick of gender and the tripe that comes with it.

Agreed. I'm not mocking. I'm bloody livid. Many women here are survivors who were fighting their way out of the oppression that comes with their born biology when the woke lot were toddling around in nappies.

the woke lot were toddling around in nappies.

Unfortunately some of the ‘woke’ are middle aged men who still like toddling around in nappies. 🤢

I'm loving this. I'm definitely and honestly going to 'identify' as gender-free or perhaps gender-fluid from now on. I've never had a specific 'gender identity', I've always just been myself. I do recognise that I am a biological female and therefore a woman, though. That has nothing to do with identity but with biological and material reality.

Fermat, that's very interesting. Perhaps instead of being gender free, we are gender resistering or refusing?

I started looking into all this gender stuff seriously a year or so ago, when I first came onto FWR questioning what the problem actually was with you all . Reading as much as I could at the time from the trans perspective, I did actually conclude I was probably agender, but also felt uncomfortable identifying as that as surely any 'dysphoria' I felt was basically due to female oppression?

I did think 'surely everyone feels like this' but the more trans literature I read the more I'm told most bio females 'feel' female-gendered (jelly babies!). I wondered if I was c*s, but couldn't get a straight answer from the trans community as to whether it simply meant 'not IDing as trans' or whether it meant 'you have a gender which matches your sex'. I definitely don't come under the latter definition, and I started to accept that I, very boring average normal me who has questioned gender norms for decades, must come under the trans umbrella.

so it's not a game, it's not a prank. I for one have felt like this for ages but have been hesitant in declaring myself as such, because it feels like such a non-event and basically what a lot of feminists have been saying for donkey's years.

Anyone denying this as a prank needs to explain why their examination of their own gender is more worthwhile than mine.

Perhaps instead of being gender free, we are gender resistering or refusing?

Gender resistering - oh yes.
But seriously yes - because Fermat is right, we're not allowed to be free of gender.