People's feelings about themselves and their 'identity' has never been in question. I'm really not sure if this talk of having one's "existence denied" is down to wilful ignorance, or just plain stupidity. This line of thought does not pass the most simple tests of reason or rationality.
I read this recently on GenderCritical Reddit.
"I think when they say "you are invalidating my existence" they really mean it. The woman they "create", and are in love with, only exists through them putting certain types of clothing (makeup, affectations) on and presenting "her" to the world. If you see through "her" to him, "she" doesn't exist."
Which would explain how differentiating between male bodied people with a feminine gender identity and biological women determined to preserve their sex based safe spaces can feel like a "hateful" attack by someone "threatening your very existence".