This isn't feminism, it's capitalism...

[PatPhoenix]

but I still just had a slightly wry smile to myself.

I have an insanely hot date next Tuesday and I can't wait [drools slightly]. The man in question is mustard keen, and has;
-allowed his beard to grow for me as I like beards and prefer his face with some covering
-bought some massage gel
-plans clean socks
-informs me he will definitely shower first.

I have:
-had my hair cut
-bought 4 different lots of underwear including weird 'sexy' stuff but have fallen back on some new pants and stockings
-bought condoms
-had a facial
-spent a lot of time trying on different outfits and shopping
-booked an appointment to have all the hair ripped off my bottom
-booked reminders for painkillers, exfoliation and aftercare for this
-booked an appointment to have my feet titivated
-spent ages on GoogleMaps working out the most convenient shag-pad, transport times etc
-booked the shag-pad
-written a complex time-line allowing me to get DC off to school, ring my aged mum, do my work hours and get to the shag-pad in an appropriately clean and titivated state.

Now, of course nobody has asked me to do any of this (well, except the work). And a lot of it is enjoyable (not so much the hair ripping out). But it did make me laugh when he said 'I'll be putting on clean socks' as if he was scaling the peaks of preparation.

There was a morecambe and wise show once with a running joke about keeping your socks on - IIRC around the same time as the, er, benefits of having warm feet during sex had been discussed in the media.

Hope your condoms haven't gone out of date.

And the light cultural reference there is Bridget Jones' Baby

I have quite the horror of toes, so I think socks are Very Good Things and actually appreciate clean ones.

[muses on asking for sexy cut out bits in the socks like what I was looking at for knickers]

Stand by what I said, cheap shot. Next time you’re ‘on business’ pass this thread around and see what everyone thinks.
Hope the date goes well OP, end of my derail.

Personally, if I was straight, I wouldn’t have sex with him if he didn’t bring his own condoms. You can use yours, but a display of taking responsibility for his own spunk would have to be shown before his cock, or my condoms came out.

I hope he’s a good shag, and he takes responsibility for his sperm.

Blur, nearly boked typing that. I’m so penis phobic.

I will 'fess up - yes he's bringing his own too. Hmm, my dubious OP is looking even more dubious.

I wish I could imagine being penis phobic. That sounds a bit odd. I'd just like to experience someone else's view properly, that's all. I guess I feel a bit weird and offput when I contemplate a woman's genitals, but I also wish I didn't feel that as it's rather self-loathing.

If you think about it logically, the whole sex thing is completely ridiculous.
Hope I'm not putting you off at all, Pat.

Well, whatevs. If lady bits make you feel a bit icky that’s your business. It was more of a sly dig at some other, no phobic type people.

Sorry bad. I can see it was a crass comment from me.

@ErrolTheDragon - I haven't seen Bridget Jones Baby. It's a true anecdote.