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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I am a female

78 replies

Livpool · 04/11/2018 23:14

Hi all

Sorry if this is weird but I am sick of not being able to describe myself as a woman.
Just seen this description and so feel at a loss xx

I am a female
OP posts:
NarcoNympho · 27/10/2019 15:58

@MrGsFancyNewVagina actually it’s a descriptor if gender, not sex (the full word is cisgender)

@TerfTalk why is cis banned? It’s not as though it’s an offensive term and it’s used in the medical field

CuckooCuckooClock · 27/10/2019 16:28

Cis is incredibly offensive. Please don’t use it.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 27/10/2019 17:02

Could you stop and think a moment. Here are some women telling you they find the way you address them to be offensive. Your response is to tell them they are wrong in their thinking and should accept the term, as you don't find it at all offensive.

Yet you decry 'misgendering'.

Hypocritical much?

That and cis is not a medical term. Oddly many posters well educated in various STEM subjects have explained this in such a simple manner that most hitherto confused posters immediately understand the nature of the misappropriation the term has undergone.

NarcoNympho · 27/10/2019 17:09

@CuckooCuckooClock could you explain how please? Never seen it used as an insult before, more a descriptor! Grin

NarcoNympho · 27/10/2019 17:10

@CuriousaboutSamphire I'm happy to learn, I'd just like to understand why it's offensive Smile

JoyceJeffries · 27/10/2019 17:13

We shouldn’t have to explain - it just is.

MrGsFancyNewVagina · 27/10/2019 17:15

actually it’s a descriptor if gender, not sex (the full word is cisgender)

How many posters have to tell you that it’s offensive, before you upset it into your head? It’s made up word that has been taken from a scientific term and misrepresented in order to stop using the sex descriptors men and women. The same people that insist on using them are the ones that cry about misgendering.

Stop lying about being willing to learn, then dismissing what women have to say. (Just for the avoidance of doubt, I mean women, not transwomen)

MrGsFancyNewVagina · 27/10/2019 17:17

it’s used in the medical field

Only by woke people, not medical staff that actually understand biology.

FreeBedForFlys · 27/10/2019 17:22

No need for cis or natal. Woman is fine.

Narco - you weren’t assigned anything at birth. It’s not like giving people tasks. Medical staff don’t toss a coin or take a vote every time a baby is born. Your biological sex was observed.

crochetandshit · 27/10/2019 17:31

Why is only trans people that are instantly listened to and obeyed when they describe something as offensive?

lazylinguist · 27/10/2019 17:41

Biologically, everyone is either male or female at birth. Their sex is a biological fact and it is observed, not assigned.

Gender is a collection of bullshit stereotypes which say what you should do/wear/like in order to be a 'proper' man or woman. If failing to fit every single one of the stereotypes for your sex means that you're non-binary, then pretty much everyone in the whole world is non-binary, because nobody lives all the girly stuff or all the blokey stuff.

Whatsnewpussyhat · 27/10/2019 17:41

Why do most non binary females present as stereotypically male then? You claim to not feel like either sex, so why hide your breasts?

JoyceJeffries · 27/10/2019 17:50

so we have to bow down to calling you they/them but you will carry on using CIS? Are you controlling in other elements of your life?

NarcoNympho · 27/10/2019 18:48

@Whatsnewpussyhat I’m more gender fluid, sometimes I see the person in the mirror is me and sometimes I want to cut my chest off, it depends on the day. I think enby captures what I am more though.
@crochetandshit but you still think trans women aren’t women which I find offensive and by the looks of the posts on here that won’t happen. I’m happy to not use cis but if I use ‘women’ I also include trans women because, shocker, they exist and are valid.
And @JoyceJeffries, when I said I was enby one of the first comments was ‘oh so your a woman then’. Nah mate, I’ll pass on that. I’m happy to not use cis but when I refer to women I mean all women

Whatsnewpussyhat · 27/10/2019 19:15

This issue is that 99%+ of females (and males) do not "identify" as anything. So why on earth should we have to then refer to ourselves as "not trans" women which is what is imposed on us by forcing the use of "cis"

We refuse the use of it as to use it to describe ourselves would mean we agree with gender ideology when we do not.

A tiny proportion of people have an issues with their biology. Woman already has a meaning.

EmpressLesbianInChair · 27/10/2019 19:23

sometimes I see the person in the mirror is me and sometimes I want to cut my chest off, it depends on the day.

Regardless of my opinions on gender, I'm sorry you feel like that, Narco. It must be very tough.

MrGsFancyNewVagina · 27/10/2019 19:23

I’m happy to not use cis but when I refer to women I mean all women

That proves you’re not willing to learn about why we discuss female rights to safety, dignity and privacy in spaces that are free from male bodied people, since you’re too far down the woke rabbit hole. Explain what a woman is, without using stereotypes and how someone can ‘feel like’ a woman.

pachyderm · 27/10/2019 19:39

There's no such thing as a non binary person. Non binary has no meaning in biology or law. I have never met anyone who could explain to me how a "non binary person" is any different to a person who rejects steretypical gender roles and presentation. I am a child of the 1970s and 80s so you'd want to work really hard to convince me that this is in some way newHmm

BoneAppleTeaa · 27/10/2019 19:41

How old are you @NarcoNympho? I’m sorry to hear that you’re so uncomfortable in your body sometimes.

I don’t think that anyone here thinks trans people don’t exist, or that they’re not valid (what does that even mean in this context?) but no matter how much anyone buys into the gender stereotypes of the opposite / any gender, biological sex does not change.

What is a woman then if you include biological males in the category also?

crochetandshit · 27/10/2019 19:54

Actually when YOU say women you mean nobody and everybody.
I mean women.

MrGsFancyNewVagina · 27/10/2019 20:45

Actually when YOU say women you mean nobody and everybody.
I mean women.

Perfectly put.

EmpressLesbianInChair · 27/10/2019 20:54

Perfectly put.

Yes, but does anyone else get the impression Narco's very young & having a difficult time?

FairyBatman · 27/10/2019 21:02

@NarcoNympho I can’t point you to any articles, but I do find the ones you posted a little contradictory. If you are genuinely interested in learning then I will share my perspective with you

I have absolutely no personal issue with transgender people, women or men. I have worked alongside both for years.

I do have an issue with TRAs who are seeking to redefine my identity purely because it suits them i.e. trying to define me as a cis-woman or a menstruator. I am proud to be female and proud to be a woman, and I get to choose the labels that apply to me as much as any transwoman or enby gets to choose theirs.

I am also really worried that there’s a movement who are trying to regress women’s rights by several decades. If you grow up as a male I genuinely think you’re going to struggle to understand that men can be frightening, and some men will go to incredible lengths to prey on vulnerable women. Self ID will allow men access to women’s safe spaces and many many women are really uncomfortable with this. If a woman dares to discuss her discomfort in the public sphere she’s immediately branded a TERF and shouted down. Some of the langage and slurs aimed at women identified as TERF is downright hideous and makes plain why many women wouldn’t feel safe around the individuals that are using it. It’s ironic really that the loudest voices can’t accept that the male privilege they experienced growing up is influencing their viewpoint.

Secondly feminists have spent decades trying to fight against the idea that women have to present in a certain way, feminine appearance, feminine manners, womanly figure, ladylike behaviour, jobs suitable for ladies, play sport like a girl. As a feminist I believe that there’s no right or wrong way to be a woman, there are times that I utterly reject female stereotypes, there are other times that I embrace every single one of them. It concerns me that females who aren’t “girly” enough or boys who aren’t “men’s men” are being othered, and effectively pushed out of their respective genders. As a result I feel that there’s a risk society will move back to the archaic moulds that we’ve fought so hard to break free of.

Lastly I am concerned that increasing numbers of teens are being pushed down medical pathways that aren’t fully researched and have unknown long term effects. Young girls are being given puberty blockers that may well render them infertile at the same time that women in their 30’s are denied sterilisation or hysterectomy ‘because they can’t possibly know if they will want children in future’ If a grown woman in her 30’s can’t know her own mind how the hell can a teenager? Similarly a biological male with gender disphoria can have breast implants, but a biological female with body dysmorphie can’t.

I really feel for anyone who is so uncomfortable with such a fundamental part of themselves, but you can’t waltz into an established community, start patronising them, vilifying then, telling them that the way they define themselves is wrong, and then get upset and angry when they won’t accept you, people don’t work like that!

Anyway enough rambling, washing up to do.

thirdfiddle · 27/10/2019 21:30

How can a human being be not "valid"? Of course transwomen exist, duh. Saying you'll be offended if I don't agree they are women makes about as much sense to me as saying you'll be offended if I don't agree some dogs are cats.

By the way, that was us being polite calling them transwomen not more accurate descriptors which make more reference to their biological sex which are banned by MN. The quid pro quo for us agreeing to do that was that cis, which many women find offensive, is also banned.

Cis is offensive to me because it implies that a) I sign up to gender ideology, which I don't and b) I have a feminine gender identity to match my sex, which I don't.

I don't have any feelings of gender identity, just an observed sex. You call yourself nonbinary, you ought to understand that. The difference is, I see that sex is a useful category still to describe someone's biology. So I describe myself as a woman because of my biology and only because of my biology. If you're going to make woman mean something else (and I still haven't figured out what it is trans advocates want it to mean) then I would no longer be a woman, but I'd need a new word to describe that useful category of people with female biology which I do belong to, and we'd need to campaign all over again for separate sports and spaces for people with female biology when they need it. Sod that, frankly. Women already had that battle once, I don't see why we should do it again.

mummmy2017 · 27/10/2019 21:41

You can put a new skin on, change the bumps and the bits that show, change how you think , feel , how others view you, but your body inside medically is always as it was, the day you were born.

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