Safeguarding Children

[raisinsraisins]

I have always been aware of safeguarding my DC and preparing them for situations they may have to deal with. I thought that the Underwear Rule video by NSPCC was great, and helped me explain to my DC what appropriate behaviour by other people is. When my DC have had to be alone with strangers, I have always told them to tell me if anything happens that didn’t feel right to them. They’re now teenagers, and have never had problems in this regard as far as I know.

However, I do feel that there is now a problem for young girls, as they are being taught that it is normal for men and boys to be in their toilets, changing rooms, sleeping areas and private spaces. Even if the men are naked in front of them this is OK because these men feel like they are women inside. Lots of places are turning gender neutral (mixed sex) too so this is not just about self-ID.

Surely this is going to make it a lot more difficult for girls to be able to learn what is inappropriate behaviour from a man. I have seen women breastfeed, change clothing, adjust their bra straps, and go to the toilet with the cubicle door open so that they can watch their baby sleeping in their pram. This is all normal to me and other girls. If a man now exposes himself to a girl in a toilet will they think that this is also a normal thing to happen? And then girls may get used to this and this could then carry over to other situations in their life?

I think they won't think it's normal and will feel uncfomfortable but they will know that they could get in trouble if they cmplained so will grit their teeth and pretend everything is fine.

And that's just one reason why self ID is such a bad idea.

https://fairplayforwomen.com

This is a really important concern OP. How are little girls to be expected to understand what is and isn't appropriate behaviour from men, when the new rules are so inconsistent and confusing?

If a little girl is exposed to a penis in a changing room by someone calling themself a man, this is a sex crime and a horrified reaction would be appropriate and reasonable. If she is exposed to a penis in a changing room by someone calling themself a woman, this is perfectly fine and OK and a horrified reaction may in fact be a hate crime. How is she supposed to learn boundaries and self-protection under these circumstances?

In general the idea is that you shoudl assume everyone knows best which faciltiiess to use and never question.

I guess the older girls are going to know what is normal behaviour or not. But the younger girls, who may have only ever know gender neutral facilities, may grow up to have a different view on what is acceptable behaviour by a man.

We can't teach girls about consent and the right to say no while at the same time telling them that 50 (or 15 ) year old Steve (now self identifying as Stephanie) has the right to be naked in the changing room beside them and that if they complain, they're bigots. It doesn't compute.

NSPCC threads about Sfeguarding concerns;

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3350778-My-letter-to-NSPCC

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3353658-AIBU-to-be-shocked-that-the-NSPCC-cancelled-their-Facebook-Live-session-with-Mumsnetters-because-they-didnt-like-the-questions-That-they-cant-explain-why-they-arent-putting-children-in-danger

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_facebook_live/a3343961-Facebook-Live-about-talking-to-kids-about-staying-safe-from-abuse-with-NSPCC