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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

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Original poster

Getting Your Pronouns Right

24 replies

OnlyObjectivity · 26/08/2018 00:24

If we go the way of Canada, it will be a crime to get someone's personal pronouns wrong.

Fortuntately I've discovered that one of Aimee's friends has produced a helpful guide so that we can get it right. How thoughtful...

Let's start with ze/hir:

Ze went to the park.
I went with hir.
Ze brought hir frisbee.
At least I think it was hirs.
Ze threw the frisbee to hirself.

Got that?
Great! - That's one down, and thirty others to go - so don't forget to check out that helpful guide - we don't want to end up on the wrong side of the law now, do we?...

OP posts:

AngryAttackKittens · 26/08/2018 00:25

Ignoring the pronoun issue, how do you throw a Frisbee to yourself, exactly?

Original poster

OnlyObjectivity · 26/08/2018 00:27

In fairness, if you get the angle right, they can behave a bit like a boomerang.

OP posts:

stillathing · 26/08/2018 00:27

Personally, I would have gone to a different park. With someone else.

IfIWasABirdIdFlyIn2ACeilingFan · 26/08/2018 00:36

I think Ze might be a springer spaniel.

LadybirdsAreBirds · 26/08/2018 00:43

Ze took a girl to the attic
Ze wore a dress
Ze has a sin who is now a dortor
The two are unconnected

AngryAttackKittens · 26/08/2018 00:44

Maybe the Frisbee identifies as a boomerang.

(Also wtf autofill, which just presented me with boomerang and Pomeranian as options for the same incomplete word.)

NameChangedAgain18 · 26/08/2018 00:45

This is about ensuring that people fuck up when using your pronouns, so that you can weaponise offence and hold on to your powerful victim status.

HavingALittleBabyToolshed · 26/08/2018 00:47

My pronoun is womendon’thavepenises.

seafret · 26/08/2018 01:29

Yep namechanged think you have it right there. Abusers are known to create traps for their victim to fall into, as an attempt to justify their rage and further abuse and punishing of the victim.

The entitlement of this group is gobsmacking when it sits alongside the utter disregard for women's own feelings.

EBearhug · 26/08/2018 01:51

As I've said before, my pronouns are I, me, mine, myself. If you are talking to me, you may use you, you, yours, yourself. If you start talking to me using any variety of third person pronouns, I am going to think you're a bit weird. (I would quite like my manager to stop using "she" quite so much when he's on the phone. As the only woman in the team, I assume he's talking about me at least some of the time.)

If I'm not there, I'm not really bothered about how you speak, and when it comes to pronouns, I'm most likely to get wound up about incorrect use of my/your/him/her/hirself.

EBearhug · 26/08/2018 01:57

I can't be arsed to read the whole guide, but is it only referring to English? If it's in Canada, then surely it should have to include French? (I am assuming they probably won't try confusing any native languages.) I am quite interested to know how languages which are more linguistically gendered than English are handling the whole pronoun sensitivity issue. Or are they just ignoring it as a load of unnecessary bollocks? Does anyone know?

Ihuntmonsters · 26/08/2018 05:56

I live in Canada and reference females as she/her and males as he/him. If in doubt I use they/them, and if it is an individual who I think might make trouble for me I use they / them and try and avoid referring to the person (avoiding them completely is really for the best I find). In general the laws in this area are primarily about employment or the provision of services and not for ordinary conversation. There are individuals who are looking to weaponise the legislation so it's a definite 'watch this space' but for now transactivists here are very much taking a 'get your changes in under the radar' approach, which is why Bill 16 was hardly mentioned anywhere in the run up to its passage in parliament. We do have a few crazies out here who say things like I am 'a female who fathered two children' but they don't seem to have the same sort of media presence here as similar individuals do in the UK.

nauticant · 26/08/2018 08:49

This is the way I see pronouns being used:

This is about me.
Everyone must centre me.
You must give everything to me, whatever it is.
The only important person is me.

RedToothBrush · 26/08/2018 08:58

I wonder what the campaign for plain english make of this bullshit.

SPOFS · 26/08/2018 09:03

Is there any difference in the pronunciation of 'her' and 'hir'?

ballsballsballs · 26/08/2018 09:55

SPOFS I think hir is pronounced as narcissist.

MagicMix · 26/08/2018 10:27

I am quite interested to know how languages which are more linguistically gendered than English are handling the whole pronoun sensitivity issue

In my country people have invented a third pronoun which sounds a bit more like a person than 'it', which is then used with the neuter gender for adjectives. Actually I think the pronoun was borrowed from Sweden.. I'm not sure how to conjugate it outside the nominative case.

LadybirdsAreBirds · 26/08/2018 10:30

SPOFS

A year 2 CHILD learning Phonics would say they are pronounced the same, but I like ballsballsballs exception to the rule

LadybirdsAreBirds · 26/08/2018 10:32

er ir and ur all sound the same in most cases

Ohh except in heritic and dirty

Original poster

OnlyObjectivity · 26/08/2018 23:54

My pronouns are this, that, and the other.

No-ones talked about Sir/Madam yet - how does that get dealt with if you work in a shop or on reception?

Good Morning Mir?
Good Morning Sadam?

OP posts:

Tonymate · 27/08/2018 07:36

Quite. I'm afraid some people think life is a TV reality show, of which they're the star.

Rufustheyawningreindeer · 27/08/2018 10:12

I just clicked on the thread...and the one underneath that is about a MIL not accepting that her DIL will not take her husbands name

The irony....decades of this and no one blinks. Forget to call someone ze and you should die in a fire

Having said that...that MIL is straight to the clink if this comes in

And the water company who called me Mrs D Reindeer...when my name is Rufus. They will be first against the wall!!

IAmLurkacus · 27/08/2018 22:22

I think hir is pronounced as narcissist.

My tango just came out my nose. I shouldn’t read FWR while drinking!

MrGHardy · 27/08/2018 23:34

Those Canadian "Human Right's Tribunals" are nothing but fascist propaganda courts that tow any one in line that does not follow the agenda.

The idea of making 'hate' a crime, that is now solely based on the accuser's feelings, is incredibly dangerous to society. Coupled with identity politics, any group can play the oppression game and paint any criticism of their 'identity' as a 'hate crime'. Paywall but The Economist had something on identity politics just recently (although it's more just a short summary of the views of the two authors).

www.economist.com/books-and-arts/2018/08/25/francis-fukuyama-and-kwame-anthony-appiah-take-on-identity-politics

"Mr Fukuyama argues, is that many people have concluded that society does not adequately value their inner worth. That is society’s fault, not their own. So the world must change and grant them more respect"

"But he is troubled by even the worthiest ones, because they so often begin by claiming that a group has been done down. To demand justice for one marginalised group is often to overlook the higher goals of equality and respect for all."

I feel like everything I have thought about identity politics in general and how trans activism is the current height of it, is incredibly well summed up by those two quotes.

ps I think everyone here knows who "for all" is particularly relevant to in this case.

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