Chestfeeding/breastfeeding infographic

[MilkSpill]

This has pushed me over the edge today. I'm not sure where it originated but it was shared by The Milk Meg on FB.

The chest feeding stuff really bothers me. It's not just women being erased, now it's babies too. Breastfeeding is not a performance to validate parental gender dysphoria. It's a human right of infants and women, which is systemically denied or used as a weapon against us. I'm not sure if I'm angrier at the TRA pushing this rubbish, or the women's advocates who are embracing it.

The thought of men chemically ‘lactating’ to ‘chestfeed’ a new born baby knocks me sick and those doctors who have helped this should be struck off.

Men trying to lactate is child abuse

This. It’s dreadful

I agree it’s a pile of crap. But also, my thoughts on this.

Part of it is context. There is currently a grassroots loose ‘campaign’ (except to my knowledge it’s not organised by anyone) which is generally tagged as ‘what breastfeeding looks like’. It’s a support thing for parents who have struggled with breastfeeding, often with poorly or disabled babies. So a picture of a Dad bottlefeeding a baby with the tag this is what breastfeeding looks like and below an explanation of the fact direct feeding has been difficult / impossible to establish, Mum is too ill herself to do all the feeds so is lying in bed expressing while Dad does the work of feeding / burping / holding the baby.

It is often NOT associated with posts looking for support with feeding. It is nearly always people saying hey look this is what breastfeeding looks like for my family don’t judge the bottle.

I don’t like the sentiment behind it personally - that it’s ok to judge formula feeding if you are sure it’s formula feeding but don’t judge the pumpers. How about don’t judge anybody and stop with the divisive crap.

Also someone saying about more than one person feeding a baby leading to supply issues, well that’s a hugely complex area. I know there are lesbian couples out there sharing feeding successfully. I think we should be wary of knee jerk shutting down of feed sharing or wet nursing as it can save not harm the nursing relationship. Some women produce fuck tons of milk (me!) others produce hardly any. Our scientific understanding of establishing supply is woeful.

So this poster is jumping on a bandwagon of a theme of ‘don’t judge me’ and with campaigns like that you are always going to get people looking to co opt that and say well if you’re not judging that then also I’m going to post and word it in such a way as to make it seem I don’t deserve judgment either . The mixing up of roles is a powerful way of doing this - the solo Mum is pumping for example. Don’t judge the bottle feeding single parent! And don’t judge the male feeders! It’s a disgusting use of society’s most villified mothers as a human shield.

I want to be kind and say Milk Meg probably saw the ‘this is what breastfeeding looks like’ line, didn’t think about it too deeply and shared it to be inclusive. After all, if you spend your days submerged in female biology you may not be aware of the challenges currently presented by TRAs. However I think the swallowing of biological males inducing lactation is indefensible. She’s really been thoughtless and dismissive here.

ijustwannadance That's so true. I was recently told I couldn't use a topical treatment for a muscle problem because I'm still breastfeeding my 16-month-old, in case a small amount was absorbed into my bloodstream. But yeah, men taking loads of hormones to produce milk...sure, no probs, let's be inclusive, y'all!

That bit about inducing lactation in men sounds repulsive, to be honest. Is there any proof it's not harmful for the baby?

Not I'm not sure, but this article I found (about a thankfully unsuccessful attempt by a man to produce milk) has a few examples linked. However, the article itself is both a bit creepy and rage-inducing, imho!

Oops - here's the link: www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/medical_examiner/2011/05/man_milk.html

That’s exactly it la contessa. There’s no place for resources to be spent on inclusivity when those designed to breastfeed aren’t being supported to breastfeed.

Yes, it's all just paying lip service to 'being inclusive'. Being truly inclusive would be ensuring that women (you know, the ones who are actually supposed to breastfeed) have enough access to support to ensure they can continue to feed if they want to.

But no, true inclusivity is apparently all about the men.

Men can't lactate enough to sustain a baby, it's a load of crap.

Virtue signalling bollocks.

And a complete work of fiction! All these theoretical parenting/feeding scenarios that don’t exist!

Two male parents, one inducing lactation... two females, one lactating naturally and one inducing lactation I mean, what a load of fanciful bollocks.

I know lactivists can be a bit cray cray, but we are not moving towards a wonderful new world in which people of different sexes and gender identities are all merrily lactating because it’s all so lovely and brilliant, we’re really not

I know lactivists can be a bit cray cray, but we are not moving towards a wonderful new world in which people of different sexes and gender identities are all merrily lactating because it’s all so lovely and brilliant, we’re really not

It does seem like we are living in a world where wishing for something makes it true.

I am a man who wishes I was a woman: oh look, I'm an actual woman.

I am a man who wishes I could breastfeed a baby: oh look, I'm lactating!

I am a woman who is using my breasts for feeding, but I don't like the word breasts because I wish I was a man: oh look, I'm not using my breasts, I'm chestfeeding.

No. Sorry, I know I'm being harsh, but I really have have enough of this horseshit.

www.thestranger.com/queer-issue-2017/2017/06/21/25225867/my-first-time-breastfeeding-my-daughter

I'm reminded of this article about a transwoman chestfeeding her new born - showing how it's definitely not a fetish - quote

Imagine the most electric thing a partner has ever done to you, then multiply it by 10...And yeah, I kind of got off on it. Don't judge.)

when they pulled my daughter free of my wife's body, I was the first one to hold her. I took her back to the hospital room and did what any mom would do—I put her on my bare chest and let her find my breast.

^I'm sure that was healthy for the babies first feed and made your wife feel wonderful...

I am incoherent with disgust at that picture. Appropriation of motherhood is so gut wrenchingly offensive. How can these people look mothers, their own mother, in the face? How can they treat a newborn like a prop? I am chilled by that level of narcissism.
This, to me, shows the gutter level disrespect for women. They can't even muster respect for the process that brought them, and every single person ever, into the world.

They = TRAs that pushed for this crap, handmaidens so woke they're broke, any man who takes a baby from its mother's breast so he can play at a fantasy role...

The only thing this is about is male envy of women and the accompanying desire to take over and own what they cannot ever have.

It's a biological nonsense - but they're welcome to the scabby nipples and mastitis

Chestfeeders can fuck off

when they pulled my daughter free of my wife's body, I was the first one to hold her. I took her back to the hospital room and did what any mom would do—I put her on my bare chest and let her find my breast

This is really disturbing. Imagine having a partner this narcissistic. You sustained and suffered through pregnancy and the painful hell of delivery and this guy just spirits away the child before then mum has even recovered. This almost reads like child theft. The woman was really nothing more than an ambulatory womb for him.

It's just vile. Is that the one who confessed to getting off on the child's mouth going to h** nipple then said 'don't judge me'?

We are judging you that's disgusting and abusive

This is wrong wrong wrong. Sorry but if you are transgender you need to accept that there's something's you just can't do. You just can't. I know it must be hard to accept if you are a man wanting to be a woman but just no. You can't do it and that's that. By all means have a sex changes etc but not this. Bizarre and it must be confusing for child? I can't get my head round this. My sisters ex is transgender and wanted their daughter to call her mum and I thought even that was too far but this is insane.

wow. what about colostrum. what about establishing supply. what about the contractions that come with breastfeeding that help the uterus return to size. what about the fact that every baby is equipped with the ability to be able to smell and find and propel itself to it's mother's milk unaided if the conditions are right. what about the release of hormones during breastfeeding that can help the mother - by that i mean the person who actually had to ride the rollercoaster that is pregnancy and birth - avoid postnatal depression.

what about the fact that the world is already hostile to this beautiful miraculous life sustaining process and that many mothers already don't get to experience much of the above due to less than ideal births and a society which fails to recognise that new mothers need a lot of support especially if they want to breast feed.

i am ALL FOR women's partners getting more involved btw. how about you change every single nappy for the first two weeks. how about you take the baby at 5am every day. that is a great way to start and the bond you will develop with your child will pay off forever.

I felt so bloody guilty for having to take antihistamine tablets throughout my pregnancy.

There is NO mentally sound reason why any born male should be allowed/need to breastfeed. They are doing it for no other reason than to validate their own lies/fantasies of "motherhood". It's fucking sick.
Why are people going along with this crap?!

This is, to me, the worst part of that Slate article, about the (single) man who was trying to force his body to produce milk:

And then I realized I was missing something essential: a child. For all our assumptions about breast-feeding, the one abiding truth is that it exists to nourish and comfort new life. The walls of gender could be broken down, but without a child to benefit, what was the point? (...) But without a child of my own, I couldn't compare myself to the Aka. Good reader, I lost heart.

Maybe one day I'll try again to climb over the gender wall, this time risking the mortification of a swollen breast and the ominous side effects of hormone-boosting pharmaceuticals. It would be nice to have a better reason than curiosity, I think. Perhaps a little baby—someone in need of sustenance and intimacy, searching for a breast to nuzzle. Yours or mine could do.

Fucking hell, that Stranger article.

Me me me me me me it's all about me me me me me me me me me me me me me me meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Seems like she’s deleted it.

No the photo is still there but not listed in posts.

And oh my god that slate article. Both articles I’ve ever read about male lactation seem to think it’s somehow erotic. It’s not in the slightest!

I think the erotic thing was misinferred from hearing about the fact many women do enjoy breastfeeding. Boob plus enjoy must equal erotic right? There being absolutely no other lens with which to view that part of a woman's anatomy.