What if girls were taught anger is good?

[TerfAndSerf]

Article by Mona Eltahawy

Wow. That was very powerful.

Both this article and the poem it linked to have really inspired me. Thanks op.

It would be a damn good thing. Convincing women that accessing their capacity for violence is 'embracing masculine norms' is one of the primary ways they are kept weak.

Always did like her! And she's right.

Love Mona Eltahawy - really strong voice

I've been thinking about this all day. It's really helped me to see my life in a different way. Thinking about a woman's voice, also today I heard about a girl scout badge in the US that girls can get if they raise their hand in class and encourage 3 other girls to do the same. I hope I get to see the impact of all of this thinking before I die!

On the difference between anger and violence, I've been thinking about anger versus the capacity to physically overwhelm another person, as in the book The Power. I didn't like the book as it travelled some typical story lines about how the world would be of women had physical power. I'd be now interested to know how the world would be if women embraced their anger.

love this

Love it. How do you actually do it though? Would love some practical ideas.

Anger does not equal violence. Non violent does not equal weak.

And I thought The Power was lazy in its execution of its premise which is too bad as a world of women with physical power who still gave birth and lactated would have been interesting to explore.

Anger informs me when my boundaries have been broken. It's a normal feeling that has been made shameful by men. Many women have been conditioned since childhood to suppress anger and it leads to illness - depression etc Some believe it underlies a lot of physical illness - all that rage turned inwards - not through their own making.

Anger is great and for some it takes a lot of getting to

And women are blamed and shamed for being angry, as the article says, because men are frightened by it - because it means we see what's going on and we see the emperor has no clothes on

I really appreciate the sentiment, but what does it mean in practice? My 5 year old dd is chock full of rage atm. It is the toddler sort of rage though, that they feel when you thwart them. It expresses itself as shouting and minor violence. How do you teach them not to scream at you and hit, at the same time as teaching them that anger is ok?

If we got angry we would change the world.

Yes I'd like to know more
Isnt it sad how a small child has no qualms about being angry but as women we have been conditioned to stifle it because it's upsetting to society

It would be amazing but you need to teach them what to do with it.

I could do with being taught how to use my anger positively too

Perhaps a distinction should be made between 'righteous indignation' type of anger and more negative types?

@Fifi5000 I tell DD it's ok to be angry. We talk about why she is angry and I apologise if I have to (normally it's because I'm winding her up). I also tell her it's not ok to hit in anger. She can shout or scream or stomp off. We can talk about it later.

It's ok to be angry,it's not ok to take it out on others.

It's ok to be angry,it's not ok to hit in anger.

woman, I love your post.

My username is ridiculous. Off to change to something a bit angry.

It is not just anger that girls have to swallow - this teacher seemed to think that dd should not stand up for herself This is what the teacher wrote about my dd in y4:

X is a hard working, well liked member of the class. She has a good sense of humour and likes to laugh! On occasions her attitude towards others can be a bit abrupt and sometimes this comes across as being quite rude. She enjoys all aspects of school, but loves nothing more than a challenge.

DD is lovely; her no nonsense attitude seems to help her get where she wants to be and protects her. I wish my other 2 would learn that. That teacher was abrupt and rude. It think she did not like herself being reflected back to her.