Unintended consequences of birth control

[FeministBadger]

This week I've had another frustrating discussion with a doctor trying to push LARCs on me and I ended up lying about planning on conceiving to get them to drop it.

Dwelling on it over the weekend, I've realised that while birth control has been a fantastic freedom for women it's come with a lot of consequences including an expectation that women should just put up with 30+ years of not so minor side effects to control their fertility.

I feel like there's a feminist explanation in here somewhere - it's almost like a backlash of "You want to be able control your fertility? Fine but you're now the only one responsible for if you get pregnant, you ought to be sexually available at all times, and don't complain about any side effects just consider yourself lucky"

Can someone a bit more feminist-y articulate what I'm saying?

HBT that's the same information i remember

I've been thinking this for ages! Well said OP

"Since having DD six months ago I’ve been certain I don’t want to go on hormonal contraception ever again- reading that Germaine Greer quote about 24/7 medication for approx. 24 fertile days a year is a total lightbulb moment.*

It really was a lightbulb for me too. I used a combination of a coitus interruptus, or jumping off at Gateshead (last stop before Newcastle so you get off the train without paying, as it used to be known up North) or remembering dates, if I couldn't remember the date (frequently) my husband just jumped off , he got into the habit of doing that anyway. He didn't mind. Apologies if that's TMI. What was amazing was that I fell pregnant the first time I had sex on the right date so clearly it's a safer method than you hear about, in fact I think it's Greer that says health pros only get to know of the people it went wrong for so hence not thinking its safe.

I also used a cap pre marriage which was fine too. A bit pf pre planning required. But again, dates.

I think the problem with withdrawal is that it absolutely relies on the man, and sadly as we know some men aren't reliable. It'd be interesting to know how many of the 'contraceptive failures' that we use to assess reliability are actually the result of knobheads refusing to use contraception.
There is a fantastic book, I think it's called 'letters from working women' that documents wc women's lives, a lot of it revolved around birth control or it's lack and women's terror of pregnancy. I remember that high praise for a husband was ' he doesn't bother me often'. I guess that's what we have to remember when we complain about contraception
www.amazon.co.uk/Maternity-Letters-Working-Collected-Co-operative/dp/0860680282?tag=mumsnetforum-21

I honestly feel trapped. I have a mirena coil and it’s an ‘ok’ option for now, my periods are much lighter and less painful and migraines aren’t as bad as on the pill. But I’m not entirely happy with it, i’m not comfortable taking hormones for so much of my life.

But would the Drs do anything about my painful periods as all they seem to offer is the pill (horrific migraines) , mirena (a few migraines but not as bad) or painkillers (don’t do much). Is there anything else? It feels like I have a choice of shit or marginally less shit.

Women are expected to be greatful for mediocrity. We’re just expected to suffer shitty side effects of contraception, put up with painful periods and other issues.

I don't have any personal experience but women do say using a menstrual cup makes periods less painful
As to contraception, women here have said fertility awareness and/or barrier methods can be fine. I used barrier methods for years (combination of diaphragm and condoms- not at the same time) it was fine. I suppose if pregnancy woud be an absolute disaster, you might think differently, say if termination was unavailable or unacceptable to you. But if that's not the case I think the slight inconvenience of barrier methods is nothing compared with messing with your body so profoundly.

I love my moon cup. I do still have pain on my heaviest day but not much. I hated tampons, cup can stay in all day, it’s cheaper and less fuss.

Well I think it's summed up in this headline:

www.elle.com/uk/life-and-culture/news/a32487/male-contraceptive-injection-halted-for-same-side-effects-women-have-been-expected-to-suffer-for-years/