Tips for keeping going / channeling rage into productive actions

[Viago]

Since the Oxfam stuff has come out, I've been reading more on the subject and heard about Kathryn Bolkovac, who was the whistleblower in Bosnia (where UN peacekeepers were involved in the trafficking, rape and torture of women and girls). I've just watched the film where she's played by Rachel Weisz. I might make a thread about the film/KB, but right now I'm so angry it would just be an inarticulate mess.

How do you keep calm so you don't make yourself ill and so that you can be productive and do things to help? Are there good ways to get the anger out? That sounds like such a selfish thing to say, given the situations of the women in Haiti and Bosnia but I feel I can't just be angry, that helps no-one. I am involved in some feminist activism/charity work but feel I can do more.

Does anyone have any advice?

Sometimes I just have to take a step back, avoid news outlets, surround myself with nature and/or people I love and take a break. I also have to actively push aside the thoughts in my head and concentrate on what is directly around me. It can take a few days, but often something will crystallise in my head and I will find everything miraculously clears so I can see a rational way forward.

I haven’t had the opportunity yet, but I also have it in mind that I want to do something active to make a positive contribution and hopefully educate myself in the process. I have been overwhelmed recently with the trans issues that are so widely discusssed here and yet realised how little it actually affects me and how little I actually know. So when I get the chance, I think I might try to get involved and perhaps volunteer in a women’s shelter or similar. Helping people feels better to me than just getting angry and doing nothing.

You aren’t alone in finding it tough.

Keep making noise.
There are so many people, male and female, out there who think there's no need for feminism, no such thing as patriarchy, and in the face of #metoo, UNpeacekeepers and Oxfam revelations, STILL default to NAMALT.

Stepping away from news is good for the blood pressure and mental health, and wise. BUT you're still left with that helpless feeling of what can we do!?... which is equally hard on the mental health.
Bloody hell you can't even donate to a good cause to feel as though you have "done something" because good causes can't be trusted!

Shouting "all men are pigs" is so tempting but it's more productive to approach the issue "women need feminism because male supremacy harms us, look at a) b) c)"....
I post stuff on stuff on social media and bore people with chat about feminist issues and the problem women face because of our position below men in society.

Even if just one person reads/hears sees the light and is "converted" then it's something. My family are all feminists now even my brother! It's very satisfying when a man "gets it".

But yes... walks in nature and candlelit baths also help...

Definitely making time for self-care. I’ve had the flu for the last fortnight and I’ve had to force myself to slow down. I’ve had a couple of articles I’ve wanted to write for FP4W but I’ve forced myself to stop, sleep and just get better. This stuff can really take its toll so take time to breathe, get off the grid, and reconnect with yourself.

I spent a week in a red mist after learning about the Bolkovac saga.

Give yourself a little time to get your head around it. Keep talking to people who see it too. Consider ways and means of having the most impact given whatever your situation is, and pace yourself. This fight isn't going to be over any time soon and we all need a break sometimes

Do you have DC? Sometimes I find that a productive way to channel my anger is to do my best to ensure things are different for the future generation. So I emphasise issues of consent and respect with my sons and my daughter and their friends, and challenge everyday sexism when I come across it.

It’s a small thing but at least it’s something.