The only problem is, like white people, cishet black men view themselves as “neutral”, with every other gender or sexuality being a deviant."
Maybe everyone views themselves as "neutral"? Or maybe this is a common feeling for men? I don't feel "neutral but then I am a feminist so I probably wouldn't. The writer is gay and that is why they constantly tried to separate themselves from black men he referred to as neutral. (The best word for him to have used probably, should have been "the norm" because everyone else is subset, not normal and or those that are within the status quo when it come to patriarchy and what it entails.)
The argument is not focused between the races but gender difference between black men and women plus gay black men (not general gay man but a subset of gay men i.e. Black men)
you have to look at the argument between black men (falling under the male group as whole) and then black women ( under women) and at the same time not think of all women,because that muddles it.
White women and men in this argument are already the default people,because of race structure/ system. For black men, because of misogyny/sexism being part of their upbringing. They also, see themselves as the default group within its community. Like the leader/controller of the sub group within the system of patriarchy and they too exert their dominance. ( and when it comes to sexism it does also affect all women because of how they have been socialised. But how they. Jew white women and black women is different based on race. The second pint is what is ring looked at because the first point falls under all men).
I also, think that the "neutral" can be explained in way that they don't think about how their actions affect others because it's normal to them. The lack of awareness for the other gender and for white people it would race. Sexuality among each sex to weed out what would be deemed deviant. (I have used sex here on purpose.)
I know that you mentioned that you don't feel neutral. That is true as long as race does not exist and only gender is the means for which things are measured. For black women, you would be neutral to us because you are the default for what a woman is because society says so. As feminist you know that men are the default because society says so.
The male dominance of space and power would make women in general not to be the norm. For something to be the norm, it would have to be accepted as what it is, (for society it would have to be of equal value) we are not as women, nor are people of colour.
But I feel like the author is tantalisingly close to intersectionality by intimating that black men are simultaneously oppressed and oppressor, yet missing the mark with the "cishet" comment. Yes that is what they are saying. They are being oppressed yet fail to see they they are doing the same thing in other ways too. They fail to see the benefit of being male. I think the author is like me. If I was to write something like that about gender, I would have to include black women too. I think this is where they tried to include themselves in the argument about black men oppressing gay men too. The word drove me me crazy reading it but I could see what they were trying to do.