Help me understand!

[allthatnonsense]

Out for dinner with two females acquaintances. The talk turns to gender equality in reference to the BBC documentary about year 3 children.

The other two women have not seen the documentary, but both insist that their daughters like "girly" things because of nature and not because of society plugging away at them from birth.

Conversation was a debate, but both women got very defensive and uppity and insisted that they didn't consider themselves or their daughters to be at all disadvantaged by gender and that they (the adult women) "don't care about equality".

I find the "don't care about equality" utterly devastating. How can they not care? They seemed really pissed off and totally in denial of there being a problem.

AIBU?

It's like someone once mentioned on here about the blinkers coming off- it can be quite painful and I think women sense this and resist it. Especially if your life is not too bad, the ways in which patriarchy impact you may seem relatively trivial. You don't really think of yourself as a member of a class, so your much higher risk of being (eg) murdered by your partner or earning less don't matter (until it actually happens).

I think that the fact that women get heated about this says a lot, too. Protesting too much.
I'd suggest they actually watch it. I've been astonished by some of the reaction and commentary. Girls think they can only be pretty and boys are better because they get to be president? well, der!

I suppose that they probably don't feel particularly strongly about anything much. Their own little lives are ticking along nicely without having to worry about what's going on in the world around them.

My favourite comments were the ones about the public sector being completely equal and even biased towards women. If I wasn't gritting my teeth my jaw would have hit the floor!

It's incredibly frustrating isn't it.
I always think the shoes thing is quite revealing, someone expressed it very well once - there may be some women's shoes that are comfortable and practical, but many/most aren't. Yet mens shoes, almost universally are fit for purpose. Why? Do women not like walking or something?

I'd suggest they watch the programme.

Two words: internalised misogyny.

You don't get it, until you do. I often think what my life would have been without the internet (mumsnet in particular).

You can't put those blinkers back on.

If you can face it, keep debating though, the drips sometimes build into a stream.

I don't think that they will watch it.

I don't think that they want to think about it, talk about it, hear about it.

The weirdest part is how much they moaned about unequal they found parenting and how useless their husbands are for the first hour.

I really want to watch this but I wonder if I should wait and watch it with DP, who is very much a "women already have equality - we have a female PM" brigade.

Does the programme adequately address the issues to someone who doesn't believe they exist?

I don't know.

People seem to be able to believe and buy into what suits them best, despite any evidence telling them that the reality is otherwise!

And when is that not true, nonsense?

Pick any subject.

Fast, always, I suppose.

I meant always true.

You answered your own question nonsense

People will believe a lie if they think, or wish it to be, the truth. Can't change that.

Cf:Brexit

Also see: Trump

You don't really think of yourself as a member of a class

This is very true isn't it - hence all the women coming on talking like your friends, and all the men coming on namalting.

FeedMeAndTellMeImPretty

Definitely watch it with him. Just don't telling that mumsnet recommends it!

You know him Datun ?!