I have read about the mental load and it does apply in our house sometimes but I also think I can be my own worst enemy as there are some things that dh wouldn't do if I didn't because he wouldn't consider them worth doing and, deep down, he's probably right.
He's taken dd1 out this afternoon and dd2 is (meant to be) asleep upstairs but for some reason I felt the need to bake biscuits for the street party rather than sit outside with my book which is what I really wanted to do. Dh had already bought some decorate-your-own gingerbread men for the kids at the street party so it's not like he hadn't thought about it, but there's no way he would have spent his time "off" baking stuff from scratch and if I ask myself why I did, I suppose it was because I want to think of myself as the sort of capable person that can rustle up shortbread for a street party without getting into a flap and if I think about it harder there are probably other examples of this that I do for my own self-image when if you asked me objectively whether it matters the answer would have to be no. Does anyone do the same?