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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

David Moyes Comments to reporter.

26 replies

DeleteOrDecay · 05/04/2017 11:01

Link:

Thoughts on this? Personally I felt his comments were inappropriate. He has since apologised.

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AssassinatedBeauty · 05/04/2017 11:06

It was a weird and aggressive inappropriate comment. I'm really not sure if he'd have been similarly aggressive to a man, perhaps he would have been.

DeleteOrDecay · 05/04/2017 11:10

Yeah I felt uncomfortable watching it. Although it was said in a 'lighthearted' way I feel like there were dark undertones of frustration in there (his team aren't doing well in the league I don't think). Not saying that he would actually slap her but I feel the comments definitely came from a place of frustration rather than humour. The woman was laughing but it's not uncommon for people to laugh in uncomfortable situations.

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Saucery · 05/04/2017 11:11

I hate the way it's been brushed off as a 'joke'. The first bit, maybe, just maybe, if indeed he would have said similar to a man (which I doubt), but the follow-up along the lines of 'watch yourself' comes across as aggressive and threatening.

WhereYouLeftIt · 05/04/2017 11:19

Moyes is my age and from the same part of the country as me (west coast of Scotland). To be honest, it is the sort of thing I heard said in jest throughout my childhood. It never felt threatening. A bit like Shrek talking to Donkey - 'You're going the right way for a smacked bottom.' It might even indicate a friendly relationship between him and the journalist. Similar to a comment made by a (female) boss of mine back in the 80s about only being polite to people she didn't like.

So no, I don't feel he was being aggressive.

AssassinatedBeauty · 05/04/2017 11:22

What the point of his "watch yourself" comment then, also not aggressive? He's just sadly been misunderstood because he's from the west coast of Scotland?

ZaziesPaws · 05/04/2017 11:26

Hmm, I'd agree up to point Where. If he said "You looking for a fight?" or even "You're not too old for a skelpit arse" maybe.

But the use of the word "slap" and/or the phrase "even though you're a woman" are totally off. It's emphasising something totally unnecessary.

Handsoffmysweets · 05/04/2017 11:29

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request

coldcanary · 05/04/2017 11:35

The reporter did laugh but to me it sounded like 'I'm laughing but you're a dick' rather than joining in with a joke. I know it's pointless to wonder but I really would like to know if he would threaten to chin a male reporter for asking uncomfortable questions.
(And on a footballing note: if he was a better manager maybe he wouldn't be asked questions he finds uncomfortable..)

WhereYouLeftIt · 05/04/2017 12:05

AssassinatedBeauty "What the point of his "watch yourself" comment then"
Just a turn of phrase, one I've used times without number.

ZaziesPaws I no longer use the words skelp/skeplit because living in England nobody knows what the hell I'm talking about! I have Anglicised my speech considerably (although still capable of coming out with words nobody knows but me occasionally).

Handsoffmysweets yes it wasn't the best thing he could have said. I'd have thought he'd been down here long enough to know how it could be taken. It was a stupid thing to say.

coldcanary possibly, but like I said I feel he's unlikely to have said what he said to someone he didn't have a good relationship with. And yes I'm pretty sure he would have said the same thing to a man (slap, not chin. Chin is very English to me.). And I, as a woman, would use the same terms talking to a man or woman.

AssassinatedBeauty · 05/04/2017 12:08

I guess he shouldn't have apologised then, and the FA should not have bothered asking him to explain himself. Just a typical Scots way of talking to people, shouldn't be taken as aggressive.

ithakabythesea · 05/04/2017 12:13

I too am from the west coast of Scotland and can confirm that it is quite a traditional and sexist part of the UK - certainly when I was growing up there. So the argument it is a west coast colloquialism (although I don't really agree it is) is really the opposite of a defence.

coldcanary · 05/04/2017 12:18

Maybe he would say similar to a man, he's never stuck me as being particularly rude in the past just clueless and this was just him running his mouth off at the end of a match. He certainly isn't the first manager to behave rudely towards a reporter.

ZaziesPaws · 05/04/2017 12:36

It's really not a typical Scots way of talking to people.

coldcanary · 05/04/2017 12:44

I suspect it's a lot to do with the way professional footballers and managers are treated as though they're some sort of gods who can do and say no wrong rather than a particularly local way of talking.
His choice of words was ill judged at best but he's one of a long line of people in the sport who has said or done something out of line and it's been excused in some way.

Darlink · 05/04/2017 12:46

Totally agree with whereyouleftit
100% my west of scotland experience of banter.
Doesn't mean I like it (I don't) but it's not a big deal

MiaowTheCat · 05/04/2017 12:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DeleteOrDecay · 05/04/2017 13:08

I do wonder if there would be more outrage if instead of saying "even though you're a woman" he had said something like "even though you're black/Muslim/disabled/etc". It seems like sexism is more socially acceptable than other types of discrimination?

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ZaziesPaws · 05/04/2017 13:23

Well, Darlink "You never, ever, raise your hand to a woman" is a mantra of the men in my family, and is definitely something that is passed from father to son amongst males of my wider acquaintance.

So with some people in the West of Scotland it would be a big deal.

Datun · 05/04/2017 18:43

Apparently she has said she was fine with it and didn't take any offence.

But I agree there was an underlying frustration with her and his choice of language disclosed a sexism that he would not have applied to a man.

With a man he may have said I disagree. Using the word 'slap' to man is a challenge. Using it to a woman is an admonition.

VeryButchyRestingFace · 06/04/2017 15:44

Moyes is my age and from the same part of the country as me (west coast of Scotland). To be honest, it is the sort of thing I heard said in jest throughout my childhood

Another West Coaster here. I struggled to get worked up about it too.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 06/04/2017 17:36

If he had been talking to a man he would have said "smack"

I do think "slap" is used in Scotland in a completely non-literal and hyperbolic way with no intention it should be taken literally.

The expression "a face you'd never tire of slapping" or similar is not uncommon, although likely to be said by women. And used by people who would never dream of slapping anyone.

A member of my book group described Anna Karenina and Jean Rhys as in want of a good slap only last week.

East coaster here , if that is relevant

NewMummyMNetter · 06/04/2017 19:27

My husband showed me this the other day! It's completely shocking! Regardless if it's tounge and cheek (which it wasn't) talking about smacking women is not even funny! The media seems to have brushed over it too!

quencher · 06/04/2017 19:48

He was being passive aggressive. There is no doubt about it.
He Made sure she knew her place next time.

DeleteOrDecay · 06/04/2017 20:23

Yes, passive aggressive! That's exactly what it is, I couldn't quite articulate it for some reason in my op.

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DeleteOrDecay · 26/04/2017 20:29

www.itv.com/news/2017-04-26/sunderland-boss-david-moyes-charged-over-comments-made-to-female-reporter/

Looks like he's now being charged with the fa. Lots of people aren't happy but good on them I say.

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