Casual sexism in learning session

[MixedMessages]

I work in a very masculine ver corporate environment and I'm struggling to articulate to my male colleagues exactly what was inappropriate about a recent learning session. It was very low level (and its possible I'm overreacting) but it grated.

The male speaker was a internationally published communications expert who throughout the day dropped a number of lazy sexist cliches which really unsettled me - partly because he felt it was ok to use them and partly because no one else even noticed. Such gems as "pretty girls -he meant women- are often the least nice don't you find" and a sort of joke/anecdote about how his "lady friend" told him she'd dreamt he'd given her a diamond ring in the run up to valentines day which portrayed her as materialistic and a bit thick.

It felt wrong but I don't know how to convey that without coming across as petty.

'Pretty girls are often the least nice' god that's grim. Can your coworkers really not see what a nasty comment that was?

It's not petty.

put in the course feedback you think the trainer would benefit from diversity awareness training & quote the examples? I had similar with a safety course at work, it was so full of "the man who designed it..." etc that eventually it was grating on me really badly. Some people are of their generation but thats why such training exists.

I agree - put it in the feedback. I did recently after a trip with my year sixes. We had a challenge of making a rocket car so had to consider air resistance, streamlining, etc. The guy supervising our group immediately allowed the eager boys to take control of the structure of the model and while the quiet girls sat there not knowing what they should do, he gave them card and pens and told them to make some design logos for the outside. After 10 mins or so when I suggested we swap roles, he said "no, no, we're getting on well here." I was very unimpressed.
We are a school in a very diverse and deprived area and lack of aspiration for girls is a MASSIVE worry.
But you have to raise these issues but they go completely unnoticed otherwise!

Did you get any response to your feedback ctrl?

Your story made me feel genuinely really sad.

OP I had one like that and I bitched about it a bit to my colleagues afterwards and they got a bit eye-rolly but listened and smiled. It was an outside speaker, client company so not in a position to feed back at all. What a dick me was though

Not ME! Although my colleagues prob thought so while I was going "AND ANOTHER THING!!!".

What a dick HE was obv.

I gave brief written feedback on the form to the company that provided the session. I have also given it to the functional lead who booked the session but it was very clear she didnt "get" my perspective at all

The "pretty girls" comment really pissed me off, not least because I think he was playing to an audience - so casual sexism to ingratiate himself with "the boys"

Well, there you have the third level of sexism in that trainer's actions: the "boys" were worth playing to and ingratiating, but you [and any other females] weren't worth that effort.

I received computing training at school recently (I'm a teacher). The trainer kept making a big deal of things like:
The first person to do this was a woman, can you believe it? A woman?

And

You could even try and get some girls engaged with this...

He was trying to be inclusive but it smacked of a men's club which had been told to allow women in.

I wish I had given feedback instead of just silently fuming.

No response Whirlpool but I'm glad I raised it anyway.

Yes I think you did the right thing that was awful.