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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Why am I annoyed about this? Nursery related.

41 replies

JadziaSnax · 30/03/2015 22:02

My 2yo DD is at nursery and they are having a fundraising day where the children bring their dolls in and parents pay a donation. This part is fine and sounds fun for the toddlers.

They've asked that the girls dress in pink and the boys dress in blue and I'm really annoyed about it. I'm trying to put my finger on what exactly is annoying me and I'm struggling to get my argument straight as to why I'm not happy to dress DD in pink for the day.

I have no problem with her wearing pink occasionally, I have a real problem with the sea of pink clothing when I'm shopping.

Am I over-reacting here or am I right to be annoyed about this?

OP posts:
reddaisy · 30/03/2015 22:05

The reason you are annoyed is because it is unacceptable gender stereotyping being strongly encourage by a setting which, in an ideal world, should let children grow and develop into individuals. Complain. I do now after a period of biting my tongue, it might be too late for this year but they might do something a bit more imaginative next year.

Original poster
JadziaSnax · 30/03/2015 22:09

Thanks reddaisy. It does feel like a feminist issue to me but I was really struggling to articulate why. I'm certainly planning on complaining to nursery about this as I do think the gender stereotyping is unacceptable.

If the request was for all children to wear orange, red, green etc, that would be fine and I'd be really happy for DD to take part. The pink and blue business has really got my back up.

OP posts:
Smartiepants79 · 30/03/2015 22:09

Why have they requested that? Very strange and outdated.
Suggesting that any one group of children wear different to another is not good practice.
It is stereotyping and I'm rather aghast that a childcare setting would even suggest it.

lightgreenglass · 30/03/2015 22:10

Complain. Then send her in all blue.

Original poster
JadziaSnax · 30/03/2015 22:15

I'm pretty aghast too Smartiepants, DS went to the same nursery and they didn't do anything like that then.

lightgreenglass, I'm planning on sending her in black jeans, purple flowery boots and her comic relief t-shirt that has 'I believe that I'm the voice of my generation' on the front Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
JadziaSnax · 30/03/2015 22:21

I've just found this from the early years foundation stage curriculum - "Providers must actively avoid gender stereotyping and must challenge any expression of prejudice or discrimination, by children or adults."

I'm using that in my complaint.

OP posts:
LittleMy1 · 30/03/2015 23:32

Bring her in dressed in a blue dress! :)

EduCated · 30/03/2015 23:39

Why on earth do they want them to do that?!

Littlefish · 30/03/2015 23:42

Absolutely complain!

It is just re-enforcing gender stereotypes.

elephantoverthehill · 30/03/2015 23:55

I think in Victorian times - I could be wrong that boys were dressed in pink dresses. Perhaps there might be a huge clothes swap to get rid of gender stereotypes. If not I would question this.

Jackieharris · 31/03/2015 00:08

I'd be very unhappy about this.

I don't think I'd want to send my DC in on that day at all unless they changed their idea.

DadWasHere · 31/03/2015 00:08

Hmm. It seems so against the day-to-day working of the current world they must have some reason for requesting it, did they say why they wanted specific colors? I don't think my daughters even owned pink outfits at that age, not sure I would want to go to a fund-raiser where I had to spend funds just to pass the color bar to go.

Proudmummy2456 · 31/03/2015 00:08

Surely for charity you can not kick up a fuss for one day?!

FishWithABicycle · 31/03/2015 00:16

Tell them that if you submit their instructions for this day to Ofsted they will fail their next inspection - any gendersplit activities are against guidelines. They should change their tune sharpish.

Original poster
JadziaSnax · 31/03/2015 00:36

They have specifically requested pink for girls and blue for boys. Is is worded as an invitation though, not an instruction. The charity is also one that I've supported previously - I have no issue at all with the fundraiser, just the clothing request.

OP posts:
elephantoverthehill · 31/03/2015 00:44

Perhaps just ask why? There maybe a completely innocent reason eg this is what the children wanted to do. But it does seem a bit weird TM

YonicScrewdriver · 31/03/2015 06:43

YANBU.

Dotheyfloat · 31/03/2015 12:08

Proudmummy2456
"Surely for charity you can not kick up a fuss for one day?!"

And ignore this pressing First World Problem, this 'Sexual Apartheid', this, this... 'Pink Holocaust'? Never!

Dotheyfloat · 31/03/2015 12:11

Although I agree with DWH, if you have to buy pink clothing purely for the sake of it, I'd be inclined to politely tell em' to sod off and send them as I usually would.

tethersend · 31/03/2015 12:25

'Pink Holocaust'?

Godwin's Law

CollatalieSisters · 31/03/2015 14:54

against the day-to-day working of the current world ?!

DWH, when were you last in a children's clothing shop? Or even a supermarket?

CollatalieSisters · 31/03/2015 14:57

Didn't know that about the EYFS curriculum - thanks Jad. Is there anything similar that applies to older children, does anyone know?

Smartiepants79 · 31/03/2015 17:20

I don't think this is 'kicking up a fuss' just pointing up this is poor practice and unecessesary.
Gender stereotyping like this should not be being encouraged by childcare settings.

insancerre · 31/03/2015 17:29

You need to complain
I'm a nursery manager and I can't think of any context in which this would be acceptable in my setting
Our boys love pink. We had a charity daycare while back and everybody dressed in pink. It was for breast cancer asconsvof our mums is in remission. Her dbs wore pink, as did most of he other boys.
Our boys wear the princess dresses all the time, probably more than the girls!
The nursery should be challenged on this - they should know better

mepoff · 01/04/2015 02:11

I like peppermint tea