Gym thinks only men can be Drs

[DrElizabethPlimpton]

I've just seen a link to a Daily Fail article (I won't link obviously) about a gym in Cambridgeshire

A paediatrician joined and she found that her electronic key wouldn't allow her access to the female changing room. The 'glitch' was explained by staff - apparently her title Dr automatically defaulted to the assumption she was male.
I'm currently speechless.

What was wrong with my solution, Kim?

No one is told they can't use a title, the problem is dealt with by techie people and access is provided without insulting the customer.

I bet this gym is one of those places that doesn't have a Ms option too so that women's only option is to be defined by whether they are the chattel of their father or of their husband. I normally choose Mr in those circumstances but then I wouldn't be able to get into the changing room!

'Being told you must use Mr because the system says so is the kind of shit trans people get everyday. And the system won't change wheres i have no doubt the gym will update their system to reflect their mistake'

Why are you talking as if everything gets fixed really quickly for women when it never does for trans people, Kim? Women have been plugging away at these issues for decades and decades. Trans issues have only been brought to most people's attention in the last few years but we're already seeing changes like the Facebook gender identity options.

Being called Mrs DH'sName which is not MY name or title in any shape or form is the kind of shit I get every day and it's not going to stop any time soon.

I think "guys" is sometimes used colloquially for a group of people - otherwise "folks"

Indeed, Countess.

It's not as though this sort of thing is a new issue, like the transgender titles.

Women have been addressing this for decades.

You'd have thought our cis privilege would have kicked in by now, wouldn't you?

Guys is the equivalent of me being told years ago that man in my textbooks, meant women too. It doesn't.
Go around calling men gals and see how they react when you tel them it means them too.

Go around calling men gals and see how they react when you tel them it means them too.

We're only allowed to "misgender" women.

Ok guys folks, I try not to use it myself but I don't think use of it means the user thinks that the "guys" are all men, especially if they have spent any time in the US

(Thinking of the phrase "aww, you guys..." for one)

I agree with alex. That would be the proper way to handle it.

This sort of thing happens to women all the time. It is also clearly a nasty issue for transmen. I know someone who had a patronizing wanker ask him 'and is it Miss, Mrs, princess or queen?'

I mean, that would make most of us puke. But the idea that it's cutesy to ask women about forms of address like that stems from the idea we don't just get a default title. It's additionally shit if that sort of cutesy question is also misgendering you, but the point is, women are taught to expect this bullshit. Not just as errors on forms, but as a constant barrage of comments - like yours, kim - that tell women, oh, what you want? Doesn't matter. Just be Miss for a while til I bother to fix the system.

I think so, buffy. IME there's a hierarchy of things considered insulting in terms of titles:

• calling a man by the wrong one. Shocking! Awful! Forms must default to Mr so this will never occur!
• calling a woman Miss/Ms when she is Mrs. She is married and has bagged her man! Respect must be given!

[very long gap]

• calling a woman one of those weird title thingies like Ms or Dr or something, who knows, can't even say them properly. Silly things. Just take what you are given and be grateful our system lets you in at all.

Guys means men. It is used to mean women too, because culturally the default is male. So women are supposed to accept being called men and feel themselves included in the term. Men would never accept a term that means women being applied to them.

"Men would never accept a term that means women being applied to them."

True.

I have used "guys" gender-neutrally but I accept that's because I'm used to mixed group = male. As per many languages like french where if all women = elles but men+women = ils

I tend to use "folk" these days as yonic mentioned

Women get "misgendered" a all of the time. And we are treated as if we are creating a fuss about nothing if we complain. Women are told everyday in these ways, that women are second class citizens.

kim your repetition of the problem indicates that you don't understand the problem.

Oh Flora... get back in your box.....

The tech people are guys because women know that women can be Dr

"Women get "misgendered" a all of the time. And we are treated as if we are creating a fuss about nothing if we complain."

And that's when we don't even accuse the people misgendering us, of violence. Because we're not narcissistic enough to define misgendering as violence.