Unsolicited penis pics on OLD

[catimini]

Why?
I just received a photo of a rather unimpressive penis from a "man" I was previously chatting with via what's app. Going very well and now we were just nailing down our schedules to have a drink (date zero).
Out of nowhere, after lots of friendly messages with an X after each one, he wrote:

"I'm so horny today - can I show you?"

And then just sent it.

What the actual fuck??

How is this acceptable/normal/why?

Online dating is destroying my faith in men, quite honestly. Are they all bad? At heart,do they all think of women as orifices for their penis?

I have no idea why a particular person would choose to do this. But it does occur frequently (as indeed does the transmission of pictures of the vulva).

One reason is "because they can"

Another is "because they are focussed on sex, not relationship"

Another is because they've heard that everyone's doing it / expecting it (especially teens of both sexes, so it's a norm from quite young)

I don't get it.

I don't get what men expect to get out of something like this.

This is one of many reasons why I will never go near OLD again.

At least he told you early on what he was like...

Me either. I wrote back - are you out of your mind? What makes you think this is ok? What would you sayif a man sent this to your sister?

And his response was like mine?hahahah.

So before I blocked him,I said it was very small and I've seen bigger on toddlers he response really? Surely you've handled one like mine before?

I despair.

Oh, ok. So he was a twat who was in it all along to send you a penis picture.

I doubt anyone has qualified the number of shots and IMO it is unrealistic to expect it.

We are in the realms of anecdote about the numbers. But yes, shots of vulvas seem to be encroaching more and more on what was previously boob shot territory.

unsolicited vulva shots?

Yes: and is the first thought is pretty much same as OP: 'why wouldn't anyone do that?"

And I think this then leads back to the perennial underlying questions of how people behave online - pictures, spam, trolling etc. Objectionable online behaviour isn't tidily split on gender lines.

And the widespread use phones which capture and transmit images is fairly new and no universal etiquette nor (I think) sufficient awareness of the pitfalls. The breach in Snapchat reported this week shows something of the extent of thoughtlessness. I don't buy the idea that all the breached images were sent with perfect consent, nor that one gender was sender and other the recipient.

I suppose I have a certain level of resignation that not everyone is going to see unsolicited (or just premature) sending of graphic personal images as I do (ie tacky). Am I being too supine? Are there ways forwards in changing online behaviour?

It's just an example of an over sexualised society.

People should really get out more (as opposed to getting it out more).

I need to see some evidence that these unsolicited vulva shots are happening on a large scale.
Over the last few years I've heard so many accounts of unsolicited cockshots. Anecdotal, yes, but it's clearly happening because it's happened to several women I know, whereas I haven't yet heard of any specific cases of vulva shots, even online.

Send a photo of an used tampon in return OP.

Many men seem think that their dicks is the finest, most erotic and most important aspect of themselves and that women will go wild with lust if they see it, like in porn.
It's either that or intending to harass.

Isn't it against the law? It's like a lazy version of flashing. Rather than replying with scathing comebacks would it be better to report him??

(...I'm not sure it's possible though)

I think dirtbags like him enjoy getting any response.

Love it, Briar!

What is the policy of OLD sites on things like this? I got hassled on Airbnb and the mods had a word, but the message thread was on the site.

There was a thread recently where a poster was OLD and various people were chatting and then talking about unsolicited dick pics.

Blah blah etc chat and then it transpired that said dick pics are usually (in the experience of the posters on that thread) FLACCID!

I mean what the actual fuck?

So I just have no comprehension of this at all. It's just bizarre.

General consensus on that thread was that this is the equivalent of flashing - show a woman your knob get a reaction they find something exciting in that even if the reaction is not positive plus thrill of doing it in the first place.

I find it incredibly hard to believe that women are sending random men pictures of their cunts as frequently as men are sending random women pictures of their (flaccid??!!!!) cocks but what do I know.

Oh Catimini I have been out of the game for years but my friends who have tried OLD have had little luck.

If I were single again I think I'd resort to that tried and tested classic of trying to meet people IRL the online stuff just seems like hard work and emotionally draining for little result!

Someone showed me a picture of his on his phone, in a pub, on our first date. So that was nice.

It's true I've been sent a few
I have on my profile now 'no cock pics'
I also have a picture of the biggest cock I've ever seen to send back just before I block the next one who dares send me one

Well done Dolly!

Nice one Dolly

That is an excellent response and I shall be advising my friend who OLD to adopt it