Can I fight access in court

[Clurfmurphy]

Hello,
My ex left me after 4 years whilst I was pregnant with our youngest son. I refused to have an abortion so he wrote me a letter "waiving all rights and responsibility" towards our youngest. He saw the boys on and off when it suited him ie between relationships, but all contact died out 1 and a half years ago. Our children are now 4 and a half and 2 and a half, and I have heard through a mutual friend he wants to go to court to gain access. He has a history of drug abuse (weed) and depression, and my children are happy without him. Does he stand a good chance of getting access? I don't want him to mess them around any more.

You'd be better off trying Legal too, but yes, he probably would get access, albeit maybe supervised at first.

www.cyriax.co.uk/advice.htm

Apparently the only right your ex has is to not be denied all contact unless for good reason (as determined by the courts). So, the default is that you can deny almost-all-contact for no stated reason, but from the circumstances as you report them it seems likely that the courts would even revoke that right if you pressed the case.

I'm no family lawyer, but the courts granting him significant access does not even sound remotely likely, what with:

*long-term absence
*sudden reappearance
*age of the children relative to the above
*recreational drug habit
*mental illness
*legally waiving responsibility for one of the children, that's gotta be a big one :P

Good luck, at any rate.

You might be better off posting in the Lone Parents or Divorce/Separation topics, as many of the posters there will have direct experience of your situation. (I'm not saying posters on FWR won't but your post isn't usually the kind of thing discussed on this board).

I wouldn't take too much notice of the gossip you've heard - sounds like he's just grandstanding and making out like you've refused him access, necessitating a court battle. In reality he hasn't even approached you to discuss contact, so I wouldn't think he was that serious.

I take it he's not paying any money for his dc?

Based on what I've read on MN I would think he would have a reasonable chance of being granted some access, but you may have grounds for it to be supervised given his drug use. Obviously depression would not be a reason for him not have access to his children unless there was a risk of harm.

Post in Legal - there is an excellent Family Law Barrister her nn is Spero and she is regularly on the Legal site.

Sorry to hear of your troubles Clurt. I agree with others when they suggest you post in legal. Spero is an actual rather than armchair expert in the field and has been very generous in helping other people with similar situations in the past.

Suffice to say that the courts will attempt to do do whatever is in your children's best interests.

Thank you for replies, I will put a post in legal.