After dinner speaking

[skrumle]

I've agreed to do the response from the lasses at a Burns Supper next year, which generally involves making fun of men (as the toast to lasses normally involves making fun of women). Since I was bored I have just spent an hour trawling the internet and most of the suggestions are totally based on sexist gender norms (e.g. jokes about men not being able to multi task and women liking to shop for shoes).

So... any suggestions for funny jokes/comments/stories that undercut sexism rather than promote it?? My audience is "surburban" and mainly 60+

I don't see how you can avoid those kind of jokes if you are meant to be making a toast with gendered jokes?

How many people will be there? Is it possible to "pick" on individuals rather than "men"?

Could you work in conjunction with whoever is doing the toast to the lasses? So you can counter their jokes with your own?

(And wow, aren't you starting early! I'm impressed!)

well... i think you can undercut norms rather than just embrace them but despite admiring comedians who can do that i'm not sure how to emulate them!

don't know the guy doing the toast at all unfortunately! and it was partly because i was at a (non burns) dinner the other night which had outstanding speakers that made me slightly panicky. i have an over-achiever thing going on and this will be my first attempt at this kind of speech - have no idea why i thought it was a good idea to agree to it.

I was at one a few years ago with a great reply - I think it was maybe Jackie Bird (I presume you're in Scotland, and therefore know who she is!) it was pretty good. Have you looked at YouTube for inspiration?

You could look for female comic's jokes to adapt.
This one from Jo Brand is great - it's poking affectionate fun at one person not 'men' in general

My husband can do the work of two men.
Unfortunately those men are Laurel and Hardy

Can you adapt that sort of thing?

Hatty Hayridge used to do a load of stuff where she poked fun at herself for being a blonde woman, but in a 'how stupid is the stereotype' kind of way. Youtube her and see what else comes up along those lines.

If you make sexist jokes about men, then you don't have any right to complain when it happens vice-versa.

You could always try referring to something from his "Merry Muses" collection, "Nine inch" springs to mind... (not very feminist, but can be made funny. An audience aged 60+ would probably be familiar anyway.)

www.angelfire.com/ar/arawelo/jokes.html

Feminist jokes. You're welcome.

I am in the US and a member of a Scottish-American organization that has a Burns Supper every year. The two toasters coordinate and there have not been any sexist jokes for the last several years, thankfully. Mainly both toasts tend to be pretty straightforward and even gallant, but that may be more a result of local cultural norms (we are in the South).