It's just a calendar.......

[newme2014]

Been here for years and recently name changed. Opened our own business last January with my husband ( male dominated job )
Have just started in the last few weeks reading through all the threads here and downloaded a few books which I am reading. I realise I am shamefully uneducated and have in the past been unable to articulate or argue my point properly IYKWIM?
So anyhoo husband mentioned in the passing that a rep had been in with calendars and he'd been given a couple... brought one home for the children for their bedroom and said he'd put the other one up in the tea room at work wink wink??
It's obviously a calendar of naked women. He knows how i feel about the way women are portrayed and exploited but says it's ' only a calendar' and no big deal. The guys need a bit of morale boosting and it's harmless. WTF??? Men need to have a naked female bodies to look at while at work?? Really??
I don't agree and told him to remove it. Nothing else mentioned and when it was brought up again turns out it's still there.
Am I being unreasonable in expecting him to take it down or is it really ok in that kind of work place in this day and age. I don't feel it is but I am struggling to tell him why ( not that I feel like I should have to explain myself to him!!!)
So long and short is i have told him that if it doesn't come down I will be in first thing Monday to take it down. Always thought he agreed with me on these issues and there's no porn etc in our home and he's never been to lap dancing but he thinks the calendar is ok?
Maybe it is ok and i am blowing it up out of all proportion!!!!

He just seems genuinely confused about the 'fuss' I am making about a calendar in a work environment where there is only ever men and there's not likely to ever be a woman working there.

And why won't a woman be working there? Please don't give me any, 'it's male dominated' - in coal mines it is actually illegal for women to work underground, they still have (had) women working in the office.

Rule of thumb for a father of daughters. Would you want your daughter exposed to that? Then why is it OK?

Julietee
I'm going to remember the horny thing. If I'm ever asked to work in a place with a calendar like that.

OP, I just wondered if that would be a helpful question to ask him. He seems to be taking the position that he doesn't objectify women but your staff do, so aw shucks, that's not his fault. Which is give if you were asking him to go round their houses and throw out their porn collections. But he's not just being passive by putting the calendar up (or buying them tickets or subscribing the office to The Sun) - he's making an active decision about business resources (in this case, wall space and promoting the supplier who is still in the effing dark ages)

He just seems genuinely confused about the 'fuss' I am making about a calendar in a work environment where there is only ever men and there's not likely to ever be a woman working there.

You're a woman! And anyway it objectifies all women and the women these neanderthals go home to.. by creating an atmosphere where women are just tits.

Sashh I am only saying there probably won't ever be any women working there as in the 30+ years he's been doing the job he's never worked with a woman.... but that's besides the point really. I also don't work there but I may do one day and yes i absolutely agree with everything everyone has said!
What the guys do in their own time is something i can't control but I can create and foster an environment where women are not plastered all over the walls and perved over.
I appreciate you all taking time to reply... only just started reading this section and have downloaded a few books that have been recommended. I feel a duh moment every wee while. It's amazing what i don't know or what i have chosen to ignore over the years....

I am only saying there probably won't ever be any women working there as in the 30+ years he's been doing the job he's never worked with a woman....

Probably part of the reason there won't ever be any women working there is because he doesn't expect it. Has he ever heard of unconscious bias?

And as you say, as far as the calendar goes, it is beside the point.

I will send him a link to that Ebearhug (if i can figure out how to!!) Thank you....
It's not been mentioned since we spoke last week. Want to make sure we only talk when I know we won't be interrupted !!
I have a lot to say!!