Marriage certificate

[PsychicPaper]

I have just come back from the registry office where we have given notice of marriage.

I was asked for my Dad's name, and his occupation

Not a word was spoken about my Mum.

Really?

yep, I was appalled by this too. My dad wasn't even at my wedding and my Mum "gave me away".

I am guessing it is a tracking thing - we are registered in our fathers names and this allows our details to be tracked via that route. but what about people who have no registered father - there are plenty of single Mums out there. Is the father's occupation put down as NA and the Mum still ignored?

This is something which needs changing. An MN campaign perhaps??

exactly, I have a close relationship with my Dad, but no more so than with my mum.

Lots of people don't even have a father named on their birth cert, but almost everyone has their mother, its much harder to be confused about maternity than paternity.

Or what about families with LGBT parents, who counts as the Dad?

The most logical solution to me would be to have space for 2 parents, and let the bride/groom choose, within reason, who to list there.

I think it should be both.

Presumably the requirement is a hangover from the early days anyway, when identity rested more in the Parish records than in governmental ones. You could probably do away with it altogether from an identity pov, but it is of interest to genealogists and family historians - who presumably would find a record of both parents more interesting.

And father only is not great for those who have to list for occupation 'deceased' (though that isn't solved for orphans even if the forms were amended).

It's ridiculously outmoded.

When we got married I had a bit of a strop about this, and so my father is listed by his retirement occupation/hobby as a small protest

I think now is a good time to change it.

We have had civil partnerships for a while now, thankfully we are finally moving on to fully recognised marriage for same sex couples.

So it feels like time to recognise that mothers are fairly important, have their own names, and guess what, most even have occupations!

It is outdated bollox. Also, for tracing family history it is a real pain as well.

It is another way of eradicating women out of history.

So who can change it, who do we need to speak to?

i think the issue is, you only become aware of it at your own marriage, when most people are busy sorting the wedding out.

Then I imagine it passes from the mind until you are the sidelined mother.

In the meantime, my best solution is to ask our mothers to be witnesses, so they will at least be on the cert

@nameequality on Twitter is doing this very thing. There is a petition here too.

Marriage certificate format has not changed since civil registration started in 1837. All other certicates birth and death have changed and collect more relevant information, but not marriage certificates.

Before 1837 the marriage act and formats was from 1754 and didn't ask for any parental information, occupation or age so in some ways was more PC than it is now.

I have a feeling Europe will have a hand in changes to our certificates any way in the near future

Yeah, I was very cross about this. I've never even met my dad, my mum raised me on her own, and yet I couldn't have her on the certificate. I had her witness it so she'd be on there somewhere, but it still made me angry.

I am interested in Family History and fron that point of view I would prefer it to have Mother and Father. Otherwise it isn't something I am bothered about in fact I I don't think I have looked at my marriage certificate in the past 10 years or more.
The only thing that made me pay it any attention is that my Birth Certificate it reads Father's Occupation: Teacher and on my Marriage Certificate fathers occupation reads Headmaster. It reminds me how hard he worked to improve life for us.

thanks for the link scallops. It's something that has always annoyed and upset me too.

In Scotland, the certificate lists both mothers' occupations. And has done for some time.

Get your act together England!

I got married a few weeks ago and have DM, DF, DMIL and DFIL's details on my marriage cert. I remember writing them all on the notice of marriage form too.

x post with yama

I'm Scottish

Thanks Scallop have signed the petition

Yamma I could also have had a humanist ceremony if i lived in Scotland!

Yep, Scotland's had mother's name, including maiden name, since the start of civil registration.

I thought this had changed, I am to see it hasn't.

I also have no recollection of doing it at out wedding, but DP did the church arrangements so maybe he filled it out...

I attended a Humanist ceremony in 2005. My sister is having one this year.

Honestly, I can't believe in 2013 it is tolerated to treat people this way in England. Women are humans too.

Mine and dh's mum and dad are on our marraige certificate (Scotland)

it's strange, isn't it, our obsession with paternity? And only bothering to remember one side of your family? When it's only recently you could be 100% sure who your dad was anyway?

I wonder what's going to happen when children of same sex marriages come to an age where they get married? Presumably in a female same sex marriage, a father's name wouldn't be on any birth certificate, so it would look like the child had had no parents when it came to get married, surely?

Or am I being obtuse?