Where do I direct my rage and the school re Pink Day?

[AnnieLobeseder]

So our school is having a Wear it Pink mufti day today to raise money for breast cancer.

When I dropped DD off this morning, I walked past 5 classrooms. All the boys bar ONE were in regular school uniform while all the girls were in pink. There was various chatter on the school mum FB group last night about sons refusing to dress in pink.

I'm so angry and disappointed about this; not with the school, but with a society that has drilled it so hard into our children's heads that Pink is for Girls and Never Ever for Boys that boys would rather miss out on mufti day than be seen in Girl Colour.

I want to write to the school and say that I hope they share my disappointment over the poor turnout from boys, and suggest that they might use this as an opportunity to discuss gender stereotyping with the children. I accept it probably won't happen but I have to try.

Can anyone think of any campaigns etc I could point the school towards? The only ones I can think of are Let Toys be Toys, which is more about toys than colours, and PinkStinks, which is more for girls who don't like pink rather than boys.

Help please?

The whole premise of a 'wear pink to raise money for breast cancer' (which I hate; there are so many more imaginative and less cliched ways of campaigning) is that pink is associated strongly with girls/women. So I'd be cross with the school for going with this in the first place, as they're supporting the very concept you then criticise.

I agree Mooncup, but it's not going to be helpful to rant at the school - they're only trying to Do a Good Thing and didn't invent the pink breast cancer campaign. So I think a softy-softly approach is only fair, but I feel I have to do something!

I'd expect the school to come up with an alternative for the boys like wearing red (which is closest colour to pink?)

But possibly the boys don't own anything in pink? Mine do but not sure all their friends do.

I have boys, they wouldn't wear pink. They really wouldn't! I'm not saying it's right, but it's to be expected surely, it's so entrenched that pink is a colour for females.

Dh's work is having a pink or blue day; wear either colour to raise money for breast cancer and prostate cancer charities. Better than just insisting if people have to wear pink which means a lot wouldn't take part and the donations are less!

I think it's odd for a school to support such a gender-specific campaign, though. They must have realised the boys wouldn't go for it and it would just reinforce existing divisions/stereotypes. Much better to support cancer research generally, as kim says.

"Dh's work is having a pink or blue day; wear either colour to raise money for breast cancer and prostate cancer charities. Better than just insisting if people have to wear pink which means a lot wouldn't take part and the donations are less!"

That would drive me insane too.

The thing is, that you can't get boys clothing in pink. So the boys won't have anything pink that they own already, and you are going to be hard pushed to find pink clothing that isn't very obviously girls clothes.

I don't really see this as a feminist issue, more simple bad planning on the part of the school.

It was made clear that boys could wear red, but they are apparently so horrified by the whole day they'd rather not participate.

My sons workplace is having 'pink' day tomorrow he is going to wear a pink tie ,I'm sure most of these little boys will grow up to be fairly sensible men ,I don't think wearing red is a compromise that should be made.

My son would have worn red if it was an acceptable alternative. What was the horror about? Breasts=boobs?

I went to Blackpool this year and there were lots of boys in shocking pink logo style polo tops (as there are every year). I think of MN every time I go and see this. So is it more that certain kinds of boys won't wear pink and don't own pink clothes? DS has no entirely pink clothes but he has t shirts with pink logos on them.

They could point out to the boys that the Cardiff Blues rugby union team's European strip is bright fuchsia pink - and you cannot get any more manly than a bunch of burly rugby players!

I was 'hearing' it more in a "don't be daft, anyone can wear pink" tone of voice in my head, Buffy.

I was grumbling about it on Facebook too, and a friend posted that when she worked for the Fire Service the firemen used to wear pink shirts for a month for charity. Her reasoning was that if firefighters can be brave and wear pink, so can school boys.

My response was much the same as Buffy's. It's shouldn't be "brave" for men to wear a "girly" colour, FFS!!

My stepsons' school goes overboard with this kind of thing so we don't buy new stuff. They don't own any pink clothes so I wouldn't have anything to put them in.

That is based on funds and common sense not the colour pink. DSS1 has a pink ukulele and DS has some pink tights (from a multipack).

I watched American football the other week and all the players were either wearing pink wrist sweat band things or had pink fabric swatch hanging from the back if their trousers. I thought it was great to see folk that kids look up to taking part. Looked like a lot of the crowd had pink bits on too.

Breast cancer affects men too - they can get it and they could be close to a woman who lives with it. Research into any type of cancer will assist research on other types. Why shouldn't they do it?

< realises this is on feminism board... Hesitant to post... Stuff it>

I totally agree with you.

I have 3 boys. No way would any of them wear pink. Also - we'd have to buy them something specifically for the day, as the only pink in this house is mine and waaaaaay too big for them.

The school did not think this through - wearing mufti for charity is great - specifying a colour is a nightmare for all sorts of reasons. Good luck raising it with the school!

I like to think if we did that at our school the boys would probably opt for pink-sprayed hair!

Just as an aside my two boys would never participate in any kind of dressing up day at school whatever the colour. I decided not to force them, not sure how I would have felt if school made it compulsory.