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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Really proud of my 17 year old daughter

192 replies

NicholasTeakozy · 25/03/2013 14:15

She posted a staus on Facebook which read:-

Seen a few status' tonight that have kind of annoyed me. I don't consider myself a feminist, but with issues like this I am. Why are women's bodies over-sexualised all the time? Why can men walk around with their tops off showing off their bodies but it isn't socially acceptable for a woman to do so? Why are women deemed "disgusting" or "sluts" if they do exactly what a man does? Why is there such a taboo on our bodies but men can prance about however the fuck they wish? Nah, fuck that. Ladies, do what you like with your body (within reason). Fuck all you patriarchal cunts.


Cue two of her male friends who argued that women who dress in skimpy clothing are more likely to be harassed and sexually assaulted Hmm to which she replied it's the rapists' fault, not the women. Over the course of an hour she tore all their arguments apart and made them look stupid. She really brought a smile to my face and made me swell with pride to see such passion and anger in one so young.

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EduCated · 25/03/2013 20:19

Soz, Copper. I shall go flagellate in the corner. Breasts fully covered, obvs.

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UptoapointLordCopper · 25/03/2013 20:28

And someone said "I couldn't get past the "I don't consider myself a feminist" ". She's 17, FFS. Give her some time.

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NicholasTeakozy · 25/03/2013 20:41

Edu :o

I should point out that she, like her siblings, has been brought up to speak her mind. They have also been taught to stand up for their beliefs, to question everything, to trust their own minds, to have enquiring minds. And most of all, to know that on the rare occasion I ask them to rein things in that they've gone too far.

DD was reacting to her male friends who had posted statuses about how girls shouldn't go out wearing skimpy outfits then complain about harrassment. And yes, I fully back her use of bad language.

Why the fuck are you attacking my daughter for her choice of language? Surely the point is her point of view? This isn't AIBU ffs. :o

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Mitchy1nge · 25/03/2013 20:45

good for you op!

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TeiTetua · 25/03/2013 20:56

Well, chip off the old block, isn't she. I wonder if kids swearing in public and not being lovingly corrected by their parents shows something about society in general? Part of the "sexual revolution" maybe, and as with most of that, you can see its good and bad points.

EduCated in particular, it's actually men more often than women who are required to keep their bodies covered up. I think it's interesting to consider when that happens, and when it's the reverse. And also what happens to someone who breaks those rules.

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Mitchy1nge · 25/03/2013 21:00

what's wrong with swearing?

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Wishiwasanheiress · 25/03/2013 21:00

Dear effing Mary Martha n f-ing Jane - uve never met a mf teen that swears? Shut the F-ront door!

I really don't believe u. We swore from 12. Not in front of parents/friends parents that'd be dumb but at school hell to the mf yeah we did! Either u aren't hearing it or they are very good actors.

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ramios · 25/03/2013 21:02

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Wishiwasanheiress · 25/03/2013 21:03

Op u seem to be being hounded for something ridiculous. I think ur daughter used EXACTLY the language of her peers.

Just some prefer to think it isn't.

Bull sh.....

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DaffodilAdams · 25/03/2013 21:04

Well clearly that isn't the case ramios. It's just in your head.

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ramios · 25/03/2013 21:05

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ramios · 25/03/2013 21:05

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Thisisaeuphemism · 25/03/2013 21:08

Fucking hell

Nicholas, can you get your daughter here ;)

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Wishiwasanheiress · 25/03/2013 21:08

Oh heavens, forgot to say, op ur daughter made great arguements. Good on her! :)

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DaffodilAdams · 25/03/2013 21:09

I actually missed she had said cunt blind as a bat. It is a pretty patriarchal to use a part of a woman's body as an insult. So I am definitely not keen on that. But the message is fine.

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Sunnywithshowers · 25/03/2013 21:09

Do one ramios

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MissBeehivingUnderTheMistletoe · 25/03/2013 21:14

LordCopper - this thread is in feminism/WR. The OP's daughter may only be 17 but according to the OP her children "...have been taught to stand up for their beliefs, to question everything, to trust their own minds, to have enquiring minds" but she does not see herself as a feminist. I'm not sure that I'd be proud of that tbh.

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UptoapointLordCopper · 25/03/2013 21:16

How many of us have our opinions maturely formed by 17? She may not consider herself a feminist now but she has certainly made a feminist stance. Give her time, I say. She does not see herself as a feminist yet.

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ramios · 25/03/2013 21:16

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Wishiwasanheiress · 25/03/2013 21:17

Ramios, yup can deny that. Extremely easily. Quite enough reportage to anecdotally support me too. Review any news area you like. State of dress is reserved for court. At point of report it isn't. That isn't a coincidence. It's just a 'thing' trotted out to garner outdated and uneducated support. Majority of rapes are by people known to the victim. Dress is very much a last point. Not a first.

Anyone who watches basic tv drama knows this.

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defineme · 25/03/2013 21:30

I think the language was entirely age appropriate and I'm assuming she wouldn't use it with her Granny or at work. My kids know there's a time and place for all language. Really normal, ordinary, respectable people use language like that. The only reason some of you think they don't is because they don't use it in front of people who wouldn't use it.
I hope she defines herself as feminist eventually.
Ramios appears to be at a different level of development to everyone else on this thread.

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TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 25/03/2013 21:36


Once more, from the top, for ramios.

The majority of rapes are committed by someone known to the victim. Clothing has nothing to do with it. Even the small percentage of stranger rapes are committed on victims in a cross section of clothing.

Most feminists are against page 3 because it objectifies women in the pages of a national newspaper - it normalises the viewing of women purely as sexual objects. It isn't prudery.

HTH.
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dummad · 25/03/2013 21:54

Like the passion, abhor the language.

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EduCated · 25/03/2013 22:17

Tei Men who walk around uncovered might get the odd look and a tut or a sigh, even a look of disgust.

Women are encouraged to do it and are then vilified for it by the press and by society. They are told they deserve what they get, that they are fair game and that they have no right to expect to be respected.

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NicholasTeakozy · 25/03/2013 22:18

ramios Mon 25-Mar-13 21:16:52

Does your daughter have to hate men before you are proud of her?

She doesn't hate men. She hates the patriarchy. How thick do you have to be to not get the difference?

Yes, she's a chip off the old block, and that's a good thing. However, I didn't teach her swear words, her mum did. We both taught her and her siblings to be everything they are.

Neither her nor her sisters identify themselves as feminists. I hope to change that, to get them to realise what they want, equality, is what I hope feminism is about.

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