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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Purity balls, your opinions?

21 replies

FirmlyInTheClosetAsImAMonster · 23/11/2012 14:29

Very interesting video, quite quick but the basics of it is that The US government is using a girls purity or virginity to enforce gender stereotypes and lower womens rights. Not sure I buy it, what do you think?
OP posts:
helpyourself · 23/11/2012 14:33

Not seen the video, but I don't like the concept of virginity as some sacred special thing- I'm a Christian and believe in Monogamy and self respect, but the whole Purity/ Virginity thing forced on girls- nah patriarchal and oppressive.

helpyourself · 23/11/2012 14:35

Couldn't view the video, but from the comments I think I'd agree- thanks for linking to it, I'll try and watch it later.

namechangeguy · 23/11/2012 15:12

One of the things I have learned on here is the inherent danger of penis-in vagina sex for women, in terms of infection and risk of pregnancy. Added to which, from a pleasure point of view, for many women it does not lead directly to orgasm. Some feminists feel that there is too much focus in society on PIV as the only form of 'real' sex for the above reasons, which by default also means that lesbian and gay people 'aren't doing it right'.

From this point of view, can it be a good thing to focus young women on abstaining from PIV, perhaps in favour of less risky alternatives health-wise?

helpyourself · 23/11/2012 15:38

If that is the intention of the purity movement, ncg I don't think the organisers know it- in fact they'd probably be horrified if that was a consequence!

namechangeguy · 23/11/2012 15:58

Might it be an unintended positive outcome though? A lowering of STDs and unwanted pregnancies has to be a good thing. If we didn't focus so much on PIV, maybe women would be more free to choose different sexual practices.

Just musing here, I don't know enough about this movement.

Nicknamegrief · 23/11/2012 16:03

As another Christian, are church teaches no sex before marriage and no heavy petting/necking either.

It is taught just as much and expected of just as much with boys as it is for girls.

So I have never considered it oppressive in any way.

expatinscotland · 23/11/2012 16:14

Plenty of these in the US, with the fathers taking the lead in protecting their daughters' purity and 'true love waits' rings and such.

Thankfully, I no longer live there.

amarylisnightandday · 23/11/2012 16:17

True love waits......that's been around donkeys years now in the us I remember a doc about it in the 90's where they but dc all their secular music!

Namechangeguy - I like your spin in it Grin

MistletoeAndTomHardyPlease · 23/11/2012 16:19

how many of those girls daddies stayed pure till marriage? Very few, if any. I'm guessing.

MistletoeAndTomHardyPlease · 23/11/2012 16:20

pure? yucky word. as if you are tainted once you have sex

this has really annoyed me actually.

MistletoeAndTomHardyPlease · 23/11/2012 16:22

sorry just had to have a little lol at miley Cyrus. she's never off liam hemsworth now!

StewieGriffinsMom · 23/11/2012 16:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sleepyhead · 23/11/2012 16:30

I've read several articles over the years which suggest that the emphasis on "purity" and virginity is interpreted very literally by teens, ie anal/oral is fine, piv is not.

I'd worry that there's an emphasis on keeping yourself "pure" which translates to intact hymen, thus neglecting safe sex messages and risking higher levels of oral/anal transmitted stds. I wonder how much other types of sexual contact are discussed at all.

grimbletart · 23/11/2012 17:09

The day they have purity balls for boys is the day I'll think this is anything but misogynist twattery.

Trills · 23/11/2012 17:10

"Purity balls" sound like something you'd put into your washing machine.

GetAllTheThings · 23/11/2012 17:20

I'd think purity balls should be a term for abstaining boys.

That whole thing with girls pledging their virginity to their dads is uber creepy.

maybenow · 23/11/2012 17:27

haven't watched the video (bad internet connection) but i can't stand the word purity for virginity.

what does that make me? and every biological mother in the world - impure?

sex isn't dirty. virginity is not pure. yes, i'm for not having sex until in a committed relationship willing to deal with the consequences of conception, but no, i don't believe in the idea of 'purity'.

expatinscotland · 23/11/2012 21:35

'The day they have purity balls for boys is the day I'll think this is anything but misogynist twattery.'

EXACTLY!

AndIfATenTonTruck · 23/11/2012 21:42

It's only sixty years (or less) since a woman was expected to go and be "churched" some days after childbirth. To wash away the filth of the filthy birth thing. Hmm . My grandmother told me, in reference to my mother who was born 1951. Just while we're talking of purity and women's bodies.

samandi · 26/11/2012 13:12

I think the whole thing is weird and creepy.

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