Male nannies/childminders

[Lottapianos]

Just listening to a discussion on the radio about male nannies. The general feeling is that having men work with young children is a good thing. No argument there!

However, the reason given is not because men are 50% of the population and it's good for children to spend time with both men and women so they can start to see both sexes as equal. The reason is that 'men and women play differently' - men are more 'rough and tumble' and kids love that Oh and some boys are growing up without a man in the home and they need a male role model in order to develop normally and not grow up gay. Or something

I really do get sick of all this essentialism - men do this, women do that - in the same way as I can't stand people talking about how boys and girls are inherently different. I really think that putting people into boxes based on their biological sex is stifling and unfair - what happens to people who don't 'perform' in the way they are expected?

Any thoughts on this issue?

[Sixer]

His hair, him wetting himself and he will never forget like you!

[Sixer]

So the difference in a child sitting on a womans lap, whilst reading and her stroking his beautiful should length blond hair, whilst her arms are wrapped around him .....is..?

[MySpanielHell]

But what is the relevance of most abuse happening in the home? That has nothing to do with the question of who teaches in schools and what the cultural attitudes within schools are.

[Sixer]

I've been sucked into something that I think is not relevent to the OP.
I think men working with children is brilliant. They are not all rough and tumble but do understand that is part of some childrens make up. I think most males that want to go along the education route, do so because they want to work with children, want to change opinion and make a difference. I have nothing but positive words, (more so than the females), for the male teachers in my local school. Wish there were more!

[MySpanielHell]

Kim, I am concerned that in society in general, there is an attitude that men need to be protected from allegations of abuse and that people who are not adult and male frequently lie about abuse. It seems that in institutions that are male dominated, abuse is less likely to be challenged (the Catholic church immediately leaps to mind).

So while I am happy with male teachers teaching my children, it could be that teachers do a good job because they are in a profession with many women in it, which stops a culture of masculinity developing.

[MySpanielHell]

It may well be that what attracts some men to work in schools is that there are a lot of female teachers and that creates an environment they would prefer to work in.

It would perhaps be interesting to know how children's behaviour differs in traditional boys' school where most teachers are male and boys' schools where there are many female teachers. One issue that teachers do sadly have to deal with is abuse of one child or teenager by another, and I wonder how the likelihood of that happening differs within different kinds of school cultures.

[EatsBrainsAndLeaves]

It is well researched that men who seek to sexual abuse children do seek out work that gives them access to children. That is an indisputable fact.

[Sixer]

Kim147 www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2664802/Paedophile-nursery-woman-told-Name-your-victims

[drater]

EatsBrainsAndLeaves You are being ridiculous, the majority, 90% of sexual abuse ocuurs by people known to the person being abused, and even so, the likelihood of being abused is miniscule... You are shocking me with your ridiculous attitudes, no wonder no men want to work in childcare when there are ignorant people such as yourself around...

[Sixer]

or how about this for women?
www.channel4.com/programmes/breaking-a-female-paedophile-ring

Good and bad from both sexes, we as parents have to trust what we are faced with. It's not always the males.

[MySpanielHell]

Drater, from the NSPCC website:


'Nearly a quarter of young adults (24.1%) experienced sexual abuse (including contact and non-contact) by an adult or by a peer during childhood.

One in six children aged 11-17 (16.5%) have experienced sexual abuse.

Almost one in 10 children aged 11-17 (9.4%) have experienced sexual abuse in the past year. Teenage girls aged between 15 and 17 years reported the highest past year rates of sexual abuse.'

And both male and female teachers are known to children, so would fall within your 90%.

[Sixer]

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8022861.stm
yet another to read Eatsbrains and Kim. Do you want me to continue, or have you got the point yet?

[Sixer]

Drater, that's only what is recorded by the NSPCC. How much isn't recorded?

[drater]

What I'm saying sixer is that it's ridiculous to generalise all men as potential rapists/molesters/abusers, from your anectdotal evidence. It's like the recent case of a man being forced to move on a plane as he was sitting next to an unaccompanied child, yet the only case of molestation on a plane was by a woman! I wonder if Eats would be fine with people not wanting their child to be in a class with black children, as they are more likely to murder, and if I had a bad experience with a black person as a child? Again, ridiculous generalisations and paedophile/molestation hysteria abound and we wonder why no men want to go into childcare.

[EatsBrainsAndLeaves]

I am not talking about anecdotal evidence. As a previous worker with children I have been on many training courses about preventing child abuse, where research is presented showing that paedophiles seek work and situations that will being them into contact with children. This is not rocket science and is extremely well known, so I am not sure why you are denying it.

[Sixer]

off to bed night!

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

eatsbrains, while I'll agree that some paedophiles seek out positions of authourity, I would repeat that most seek out the vulnerable mothers of yet-more vulnerable children. The vast majority of child sexual abuse takes place within the family, but you seek to demonise all fathers who change nappies?

[LurkingAndLearningLovesOrange]

I agree with Eats. I don't think she's demonising at all.

We live in a culture where if a non male non adult says a male teacher touched her, doubt is instantly cast. That's my issue.

[exoticfruits]

Meanwhile childcare will always be 'women's work'. People can't complain that it is seen like this when they won't employ a male nanny themselves. It will only be an equal opportunities job when they are equally considered. At the moment only a minority of women would employ one, and then they probably have boys and not girls.