help me find a non sexist credit card!

[MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay]

I am fuming tonight.
DH and I have a joint credit card.. or it WAS. I am the family banker, and so all the finances, pay card etc. Generally I pay online but Tescos only update their site once a month which irritates me as often I pay it off mid month.
So tonight I rang them to pay it off and after an interminable length of time trying to get thro to an actual human, I checked the balance and asked to pay.

At which point they asked if my husband was there.. I asked why. Well, said the woman, we need the permission of the primary card holder before I could pay! Hmm since when I asked, as we had a joint account (had specifically stated this when we opened the account a few years ago) and were joint card holders.

On no, sorry he is the primary card holder. Since when? Since we made a few changes to our system. Why have you made HIM primary card holder, given that ALL account payments, issues etc have always been done by myself, paid from MY account etc... never had an issue before!

pause.. silence.. then 'sorry but HE is the primary account holder' ' new policy..'

I am fucking fuming. I had to hand the phone to my bemused husband who confirmed bla bla and gave it back for me so I could pay. Which I did and curtly informed them that we were now closing the account.

SO.. I m looking for a new account. We prefer a joint account for ease but under NO circumstances am I ever using anyone who automatically makes my husband primary holder over myself! Surely there must be somewhere out there that isn't so ridiculous?

(failing that any recommendations for a card for myself....)
Ta!

I don't get it...

nickelbabe is distracting herself from her other concerns by posting on here and I thought nothing would be better than another reminder she's not yet in labor.

I'm not sure she loves me very much right now.

I think maybe joint accounts induce the things that lead to you getting in a state where you eventually do go into labour...

True.

In our case DH was the first applicant for the Tesco card as I am a SAHM so he's the one with the income, so more likely to get the card. We got very fed up with them refusing to speak to me, so he wrote a letter (well I did, but in his name and he signed it!) authorising them to talk to me. Now when they call they'll talk to me, sometimes they need to check the file for the authorisation, but it's not been a problem :)

nah, i don't think they do

I think a joint account would induce a migraine at the very least for me! :)

I kind of see what you're saying LRD, but I'm just wary of entwining my finances with any other person more than is absolutely necessary. A dear friend was unable to get a divorce for 2 years because of a dispute related to debts run up by her ex on a joint account shortly after they split. She was unable to get the account closed while it was in overdraft and he refused to pay anything in to clear it. She couldn't afford to pay off the overdraft herself so was well and truly stuck. It was an absolute nightmare.

I guess the underlying issue is that if you are in a position where you have to share responsibility for financial management with another person, be they partner or housemate, you absolutely have to have clear communication and preferably, similar attitudes to money, or there could be choppy seas ahead.

Anyhow, sorry that that is quite a diversion from the original thread.

sorry bumpybecky that was to LRD not to you!

I'd guessed that! you in labour yet? [ducks]

I have recently married and our finances are separate - I pay the bills and he puts the right amount in my account every month.

I rang up British gas to put DH on the bill so he could talk to them, bearing in mind I have been the customer, and the bill comes out of MY account. To my annoyance we recieved a letter address to Mr & Mrs DoesNot's DH GiveAFig.

Pissed me off so much, where's MY name? Why am I all of a sudden Mrs DoesNot's DH GiveAFig instead of just mrs DoesNotGiveAFig? grr. Sorry for the hijack.