Name changing

[nocluenoclueatall]

Okay. So I got married three years ago and kept my own name. It wasn't a decision I thought about much, I liked my name, and didn't really see the point changing it. I still don't.

BUT... when I had DC1 (now two) I gave him DH's surname. Again, didn't think about it much, it just felt like the right thing to do. I'm pregnant again and now wondering about the whole surname thing. I still like my name, and I like DH's and DC1s, but if DC2 has the same name I'm going to be the odd one out. Which I really don't like the thought of at all.

What are our options? DH would love it if I added his name to mine, but knows my thoughts and never mentions it. I don't really want to have two surnames, I like my name just as it is.

What do other people do about this?

Maybe keep your surname and double-barrel those of your DCs?

What Snorbs said.

DH and I both have our respective names. We have been thinking about changing our family name to something completely new by deed poll, though, once kids come along.

I realize this is unusual. It's also definitely influenced by the fact that we are both not emotionally attached to our family names.

Do what we did; I have my name, DH has his. Boys have his name. Girls have mine.

But aren't you already the odd one out? What is it about having a second child that has made you question the initial decision?

Double-barrelling the kids' names will certainly raise fewer eyebrows than different sibling surnames (there was a thread in AIBU about it the other day). I will just be giving DCs my surname as second middle. Not ideal but I really, really don't like our surnames combined and don't care enough to do anything more boundary-pushing. Also my mum was the odd one out as she kept her surname and it has never bothered me in the slightest.

Thanks everyone for your replies. Still not sure what to do, I think it's a bit of a thorny issue for me, but Bue it's good to know that kids can grow up in a two-named household and come out of it unscathed.

Actually I think I'll probably do what you're planning - my surname as a middle name. Not ideal, but it might help out at passport control (I have to take my son's birth certificate at the moment when we're traveling a deux... it always takes ages because we've got different nationalities as well and there's nothing on children's passports to name the parents. Which always struck me as a bit odd, but there it is).