Yes I'm ashamed of myself, but what should I have said?

[LynetteScavo]

I was talking to my boys about when DH was faced with a difficulty.

I said something along the line of "Dad didn't just sit around the house moping, he manned up and went out and sorted it out"

DS2 said "So if you were a woman, would you woman up?"

I don't want this to be an "oh isn't it awful there isn't a female phrase for this, life is so unfair" thread....I want to move forward and use a non sexist term.

Should I just drop "woman up" into conversation? Or should I stick to "face up"?

Be hard for your Ds to "woman up" though

Use face up in the future I guess but don't think what you said was too bad, it just means act like an adult to me.

I like 'spine' and 'guts' in these situations. "Summon the intestinal fortitude" is a saying in my house. Speaking of which , I must summon the intestinal fortitude to do some washing up...

Aren't we already up there? You know being women and all that. Isnt it just men that have to man up? Lol

We say woman up!...I don't think it's bad...I have 2 DDs, I want them to think of women as strong. They hear Man up in relation to their Dad.

take on the challenge

not keen on man up, or woman up or grow a back bone - as they have a negative implication that the person is the opposite which in this means someone ineffectual.

I dislike the phrase for two reasons, one a proper feminist reason and the other a 'what about the menz' point.

1. To 'man up' usually seems to mean to toughen up, go out there, and get stuff done - it implies that success through hard work is an exclusively male attribute.

1. It reinforces gender stereotypes so that any male who is somewhere below John Wayne on the tough-and-gruff scale feels inadequate.

Speaking of John Wayne, I have heard an adapted phrase: 'cowboy (the fuck) up'. This still implies that toughness and success is a male field, but it does at least not say that all men should aspire to such behaviour.

In our house we have "woman up", "girl up" and "boy up" (not to be confused with "buoy up" obviously), partly because it just feels mean to tell a small child to be an adult.

I do like "remember you have vertebrae" - I may borrow that one.

As a child my mum used to come and check how I was getting on with some job or other by asking was I "coping womanfully".

I'd be happy to use "woman up".

What has underwear got to do with inner strength though Fidgety ?

How about 'shape up' or 'get a grip'?

isn't this a bit silly?
"Man up"is a soft, slightly daft phrase that implies so much but says so little, as Lynette has discovered. It is gender-specific, when we are already blessed with suitable non-gendered language. "woman up " is just as silly. We are referring to a quality that both genders can adopt. Be brave, resilient, resourceful, determined, focussed - they are all there already. No need to genderise it. ( Gosh, 'genderise' - am hating it, and liking it at the same time!)

I really, really, really detest the term "man up." Seems to be one of those trendy phrases at the moment but yes, it reinforces gender stereotypes - that men have to be strong, assertive and in control (and therefore, women should be sweet, passive, soft and accommodating.)

Face up, shape up, get a grip, all of those do the trick with out any questionable undertones.

"Man up" - have only used it once, ever, as a sort of piss take. To a gay mate who really couldn;t decide which sweater to buy. I used it. We both fell about laughing.