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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

90% Think it's okay to hit women!!!!

26 replies

FatimahZarah · 15/09/2011 12:22

thisisabuse.direct.gov.uk/

Can anyone here actually believe the results of this poll?

We should demand it be taken down

OP posts:
shesparkles · 15/09/2011 12:24

I don't know any men who believe that, goodness knows who they sampled

ImpyCelyn · 15/09/2011 12:52

My brother thinks (or at least thought) that it was not OK to hit women in general but that as I was his sister that didn't count. That was when he was about 18, not a child. When I told him I thought he had a bad attitude towards women he told me I was a clueless bitch and hit me.

Also I knew some men at university who thought it was modern thinking that if you're in a situation where you would hit a man (fgs anyway) you should hit a woman as well - cos they want to be treated equally after all. They couldn't understand that some of us thought it wasn't even appropriate to hit a man just because he insulted you, your girlfriend, you family, whatever.

So I do think that perhaps there are men who would say it's not OK to hit your wife or girlfriend, but then have different rules for other women.

I can't believe it's 90% though, that seems ridiculous. Absolutely horrifying if it's true.

JLK2 · 15/09/2011 22:45

The OP should probably say that the poll question is "is it ok to hit your bf/gf if they flirt?"

It is not specifically about women at all.

KRICRI · 16/09/2011 11:26

Even so JLK, I think it's pretty stupid to put a poll like that up on a site which is meant to raise awareness and prevent abuse in teen relationships. Like most anonymous online polls, it means nothing. But, in this context, it undermines everything else that site is trying to say.

If anything, it's "a bunch of boring old government tossers say hitting your partner is wrong, but look, other kids think it's okay, so hey, it's okay!"

Riakin · 24/11/2011 13:58

lol wut!

definately fake.

Hulababy · 24/11/2011 14:00

I don't known many people that believe it is okay to hit their partner, regardless of gender.

I do know of some people who would think it is okay to hit anyone if they did something they feel was wrong. But tbh, gender doesn't come into it with those people, although I do have to say that I know of more women that think it is okay to use voilence in this way, than men.

Drowz0r · 11/12/2011 20:27

Most online polls give hugely inaccurate results due to loaded or ambigious questions. For instance:

"Is it ok to hit a woman?" can be taken and written in a variety of ways - so without context it's difficult to answer honestly.

In a general sense, it's not alright to hit anyone - but if you were taking into account all circumstances then yes, many people would hit someone, and seeing as woman are "someone" then many people would answer yes.

Context is probably all that was missing from the poll.

BCrocker · 04/03/2012 18:47

Surprised anyone would believe this! That would make 10% of the population who believe hitting a woman is wrong...

What percentage think hitting a person is wrong, of either sex?

Trills · 04/03/2012 18:50

I am not going to react until I know what the question actually asked and who the respondents are.

Trills · 04/03/2012 18:51

if you're in a situation where you would hit a man (fgs anyway) you should hit a woman as well

Yes, but rather missing the point that there are really very few situations (self-defense, for example) where you should hit a man.

rubmeup · 19/03/2012 16:48

its nonsense

rubmeup · 19/03/2012 16:50

....and dont even get me started about the rubbish impycelyn is extrapolating from her experience with her brother......its even less relevant or well structured than the poll in question....which is worthless

truthwillout · 19/03/2012 21:51

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

Schnarkle · 19/03/2012 23:44

To blah or not to blah?, truthwillout, THAT is the question.

KRITIQ · 20/03/2012 00:37

Suzanne Steinmetz, respected? Pull the other one. She died a few years ago and yes, was known as probably the world's leading advocate for "battered men," and her use of Strauss, Gelles, et. al.'s discredited "conflict tactic scale" to inflate proportions of domestic abuse perpetrated by women was constantly challenged.

However, even SHE was quoted in Alix Kirsta's book Deadlier Than the Male as admitting that the way men and women conceptualise being abuse differs sharply. Women tend to internalise the messages of their abusers about how they are useless, worthless, deserve abuse for not being good enough and that the abuse is their fault. This can effect their self esteem for a lifetime. Men who are abused tend to locate responsibility for abuse they suffer squarely with the women who abuse them - they are crazy, they are hormonal, they are deranged, etc. Steinmetz admitted that men who are abused tend to retain higher levels of self-esteem, and any loss tends to be regained after the relationship ends. Not so for women.

If you are going to quote research, it's good to know what you're talking about first.

Zaraa · 20/07/2012 20:20

One problem with feminism I have is all too often statistics like this are thrown around, they often come with no source and they change all the time. Almost as if someone is just pulling figures out from their to scaremonger people into supporting feminism.

Give you a tip- it doesn't paint feminism in a very honest light.

StewieGriffinsMom · 20/07/2012 20:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HecateHarshPants · 20/07/2012 20:28

If 90% of people who responded to that survey believe that, then is that a reason to take the poll down, or to use that poll to say no! This is wrong - and why. And educate? Since the site's aim is to educate?

exoticfruits · 20/07/2012 20:44

Goodness knows who they asked-but I discount it straight off.

Trills · 20/07/2012 20:45

Zombie thread, anyone?

StewieGriffinsMom · 20/07/2012 20:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Trills · 20/07/2012 20:53

I don't know - but I think that if the best example you can come up with of something people are doing all too often has not been mentioned for 4 months then maybe they are not doing it that often at all (even if that is what they are doing).

Zaraa · 20/07/2012 21:12

I'm interested in this case where they got the 90% figure?

Did they go to a prison and only poll inmates who had been charged with sexual assault?

Did the surveyors ask misleading ambigious questions and/or twist the responses to get the result they wanted?

It makes me wonder. I just find it very difficult to believe if in an unbiased setting a large number and range of people were asked "do you think it's ok to hit women" that 90% would reply "yes I think it is ok to hit women".

StewieGriffinsMom · 20/07/2012 21:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Trills · 20/07/2012 21:16

If you see my comments above from back in March, I can see a number of ways of phrasing the question where you might answer "yes it is okay to hit a woman".